Life Lessons

The author describes her despair and an enduring dark night of the soul after the losses of her beloved pets a border collie and pot belly pig.

At one point, she even contemplates suicide (giving into the desire to no longer exist). Sy Montgomery doesn’t find hope or release from this dark depression until she takes a journey and a finds solace in ceremony: “I found again the wildness that keeps us sane and whole, the wild, delicious hunger for life. The day we released Christopher back into the forest, it set me free, too” (121).

As we witness the impact of a global pandemic, climate change, and natural resource depletion through hurricanes on the east coast and wildfires on the west coast, the sense of despair and loss can be overwhelming. How do you find hope in the face of despair? How can we transform our classes and education system to help new students and leaders transform despair into hope?

The year 2020 will be one that no one ever forgets. It has been a year of trials, tribulations, and loss. No one knew that when we left for spring break in March that it would be our last time on campus for quite a while. Although there has been much sadness, there has also been happiness. People have gotten to enjoy time at home with their family and/or pets. After being a busy college student who works and has a fiancé, I was forced to spend time with my parents, with whom I live. Before COVID-19, I was at school all day, 5 days a week, while working in between then. During the weekends, I spent my time with my fiancé, so I was rarely ever home. My parents and I, essentially, had to relearn how to live together. Being around each other 24/7 was and is difficult – especially now that I am an adult trying to start my life. Although it has been difficult, I would not trade the time I get to spend with my parents, puppies, and nephew (whom we help my brother raise), for anything. I have come to the realization that once I get married in November, life will forever change. Watching wildfires engulf the west coast and hurricanes and natural disasters ravish the east coast, I am reminded how lucky we are to not be in those situations. I often feel “spoiled” because I do not have to deal with 99% of the situations the rest of the world is faced with. I love the saying, “do not think ‘why is this happening to me’, but rather ‘what is this trying to teach me.’”

I think our perspective on the world is largely shaped by our childhood, but can be controlled through our thoughts as adults. I believe one can speak something into existence. So, I you speak about hope enough, you will eventually start to truly believe it. I also look to God for hope. I am a Christian. I put my trust in Him and know that no matter how much I try to control things, God’s plan will always prevail. I pray every day for those less fortunate than me, and for those experiencing these natural disasters and losing everything they have ever known. I pray that God gives them hope even though they probably cannot see the light at the end of the tunnel, just like Sy Montgomery couldn’t after Tess and Christopher died. However, I am human and I have my many imperfections. My empathy shows and I end up caving in to a panic attack because of the inherent uncertainty of our world. I think that if we taught in classrooms that not everything in life has to go perfectly, that we all would be able to cope with a change in plans much better. Getting rid of the expectation of perfection is the key and I believe would take the pressure off of people to keep making insane progress even though the world around them is practically falling apart. I find that a lot of my anxiety from the global pandemic and crazy amount of natural disasters also stems from the inability to perform as I should academically. I want others to know that it is okay to struggle – that is often where we learn the most about ourselves and retain the most useful information. We should relish in our lives right now and live for the present. Being content where you are currently in life will help you be even happier in the future because you truly appreciate every circumstance – even if it is not part of the plan.