1. Study and test your own projective listening.

PROJECTIVE LISTENING

Are you an active listener? You can consider yourself one if you concentrate on what you hear and process the information so that your views and the speaker’s are unified or combined. That is ideal listening.

At times, however, you listen and absorb the information according to your own perspective. You either ignore or give less importance to the speaker’s views. This is called projective listening.

In projective listening, one does not allow anything that was said to influence his/her attitude and level of knowledge and understanding because one already has his/her own views.

A LITTLE INCIDENT

(by Lu Xun)

Six years have gone by, as so many wakes, since I came to the capital from the village. During all that time there have occurred many of those events known as affairs of the state. A great number of which I have seen or heard about.

My heart does not seem to have been in the least affected by any of them and recollection now only tends to increase my ill temper and cause me to like people less as the day wears on.

But one little incident alone is deep with meaning to me and I am unable to forget it, even now.

It was a winter day in the sixth year of the Republic and a strong northerly wind blew furiously. To make a living, I had to be up early and on the way to my duties I encountered scarcely anyone. After much difficulty I finally succeeded in hiring a rickshaw.

I told the puller to take me to the south gate. After a while the wind moderated its fury and in its wake the streets were left clean of the loose dust. The puller ran quickly. Just as we approached the south gate, somebody ran in front of us, got entangled in the rickshaw and tumbled to the ground.

It was a woman with streaks of white in her hair and she wore ragged clothes. She had darted suddenly from the side of the street and directly in front of us. My puller tried to swerve aside, but her tattered jacket unbuttoned and, fluttering in the wind, caught in the shafts.

Fortunately the puller had slowed his pace, otherwise she would have been thrown head over heels and probably injured.

After we halted the woman still knelt on all fours. I did not think she was hurt, no one else had seen the collision and it irritated me that the puller had stopped and was apparently prepared the get himself involved in some foolish complication.

It might delay and trouble my journey. "It's nothing", I told him, "move on", but either he did not hear me or did not care for he put down the shafts and gently helped the old woman to her feet. He held her arms, supporting her and asked: "Are you all right?" "I'm hurt."

I thought I saw you fall and it was not all rough, how can you be hurt? You're pretending.

The whole business is distasteful and rickshaw man is merely making difficulties for himself. Now let him find his own way out of the mess. But the puller did not hesitate for a moment after the old woman said she was injured. Still holding her arm, he walked carefully ahead with her. Then I was surprised as looking ahead I suddenly noticed a police station and saw that he was taking her there.

No one was outside, so he guided her in through the gate. As they passed in I experienced a curious sensation. I do not know why but at that moment it suddenly seemed to me that his dust-covered figure loomed enormous and as he walked farther, he continued to grow until finally I had to lift my head to follow him.

At the same time I felt a bodily pressure all over me which came from his direction. It seemed to almost push out from me all the "littleness" that hid under my fur-lined gown. I grew weak as though my vitality has been spent, as though the blood had frozen in me. I sat motionless, stunned and thoughtless until I saw an officer emerge from the station.

Then I got off from the rickshaw as he approached me. "Get another rickshaw", he advised, "this man can't pull you anymore". Without thinking I thrust my hand into my pocket and pulled forth a big fist full of coppers. "Give the fellow these", I said.

The wind had seized entirely but the street was still quiet. I mused as I walked but I was almost afraid to think about myself. Leaving aside what had happened before, a sudden explanation for a fistful of coppers... Why had I given them? As a reward? And did I think of myself after my conduct, fit to pass judgment upon the rickshaw puller? I could not answer my own conscience.

Till now that experience burns in my memory. I think of it and introspect with pain and effort. The political and military drama of these years is to me like the classics I read in childhood - I can not recite half a line of it, but always, before my eyes, pursuing me with shame, impelling me to better myself, invigorating my hope and courage, this little incident is re-enacted - I see it in every detail as distinctly as on the day it happened.

QUESTIONS TO ASK MYSELF

1. What is the author’s purpose in recounting this little incident?

2. What thoughts and feelings were expressed by the author? Why did he think and feel that way?

3. Describe the tone or writer’s attitude toward the characters.

a. rickshaw puller

b. old woman

c. people

4. Describe the mood or the feeling that the writer conveyed to the reader.

5. DO YOU RELATE/AGREE?

I DON'T AGREE

Say it differently

1. I'm afraid I disagree with you there.

It's better to buy an apartment than to rent one.

I'm afraid I disagree with you there. A mortgage takes away your freedom.

2. We're on different pages.

I prefer buying material things rather than spend money on travelling.

We are on different pages. I'd rather spend my savings on getting to know the world and having new experiences.

3. I wouldn't say that.

From my point of view, travelling alone is dangerous and boring.

I wouldn't say that. Jumping off the deep end and over-coming a fear of travelling on your own makes you grow, and on top of that, you get to meet a lot of new people.

4. I'm not convinced.

Paper books are more convenient.

I'm not convinced. eBooks are eco-friendly, convenient and economical.

5. I see what you mean but....

To me, living in the countryside is much better.

I see what you mean, but I'm a city girl.

6. Not necessarily.

Working remotely is much tougher than at the office.

Not necessarily. You can save a lot of time and money by not commuting.

7. I can't quite see your point on this.

If you ask me the weather is not something you need to take into account when moving abroad.

I can't quite see your point on this. The weather really affects my mood and energy levels.

8. I'm not sure about that.

It seems to me that you can't become fluent in English unless you live in an English speaking country.

I'm not sure about that. In this day and age, there are many tools that can help you reach a high level of English.

9. Let's agree to disagree.

I believe there's nothing wrong with fast food.

Well then let's just agree to disagree.

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