Tips and Tricks

College

• If you need to write a reference you can go to google scholar and click on "- citation sign and copy literature in APA standards 

• If article is locked you can always aks author for copy of it without needing to pay

• You can always try google search for article, author and pdf written next to it

Habits and actions

• Have 30-60 minutes without technology in the morning- no mindless scrolling

• Cut caffeine

• Pace around room here and there (study breaks, phone calls)

• Take time to think ( reflect on your day, how you feel, try not to distract yourself)

• It is better to do "meh" or good each day than great but rarely (example: workout- you do more reps, writing- writing few sentences each day ...)

• Solving confidence with achivement is not always the best option (there is always someone better) - forget about outside expectations

• Test your thoughts
  Example: I am shy- "my brain works like that" ->Reasuring to accept, but makes it harder to change that behaviour- try to remember moments when you were not shy, or were less shy

Assertive communication 

1. Start your message with "I" to take ownership of your feelings and thoughts. For example, "I feel," "I think," or "I believe."

2. Clearly and objectively describe the specific situation, behavior, or action that is relevant to your message. Be specific and avoid making generalizations or assumptions.

3. Use "I" statements to express your feelings, thoughts, or needs related to the situation. Be honest and direct about how you feel or what you think.

4. Clearly state what you need or what action you would like the other person to take. Make your requests specific and achievable.

5. After expressing yourself, actively listen to the other person's response. Give them the opportunity to express their thoughts and feelings as well.

6. Maintain a calm and respectful tone throughout the conversation. Avoid becoming defensive or aggressive. 

7. Treat the other person with respect, even if you disagree.

8. Pay attention to your nonverbal cues, such as body language and eye contact. Maintain appropriate eye contact and use open body language to convey confidence and sincerity.

9.  Try to understand the other person's perspective and acknowledge their feelings. Empathizing with their point of view can help build rapport.

10. If appropriate, work together to find a mutually acceptable solution to the issue at hand. Be open to compromise and collaboration.

"I feel x (expressing your feeling) when you y (describing the behavior). I believe that (expressing your belief)...Could you do z next time (stating your request)?"

• Instead of THIS use THIS : 

 WHY? > WHAT AND HOW?

YOU ALWAYS/NEVER- USUALLY,FREQUENTLY

BUT - AND (I care for X and I want Y)

Social skills 

1. Dont try to be interesting, be interested (ask questions, listen)

2. Use their name in a sentence (It will help you remember next time)

3. Smile 

4. If you are going to give compliments make them genuine

Communication with "entitled" parents

Some parents believe that  they have a right to know everything that is happening in childs life, they dont respect boundaries and have unrealistic demands and expectations

1. Dont try to explain yourself or give arguments

2. Ask them what are "rules of the game" and what is your relationship like(example: If you need to listen while under their roof, what will happen when you move out?)

3. Ask them what is their goal and expectation

4. By asking questions get them to think about situation
   
   

For more detailed examples look for HealthyGamerGGs videos at https://www.youtube.com/@HealthyGamerGG