What Wasn’t Said: Why I Left the Ombuds World

Survivor’s Declaration of Integrity

I am someone who told the truth.
I upheld the values others claimed to believe in.
I was harmed, and I was silenced, it destroyed my career.
But I survived with my integrity intact.

I no longer ask for permission to exist.
I do not shrink to fit a system that cannot see me.
I do not carry shame for the failures of institutions.

I carry fire. I carry clarity. I carry the memory of what should have been.

I am not what was done to me. I am what I create from it.

This is my stand.
This is my healing.
This is my sacred refusal to disappear.

Let this stand as a blessing to all who were forced to walk away in silence. We speak now. We weave new worlds.

A Personal Reckoning with Institutional Betrayal, Suppression, and the Path Beyond

“I did not leave because I lacked vision. I left because I told the truth — and the system was not ready to hear it.”

The Context

For over three years I was of service to the office, to the field, I did my best to walk in alignment with integrity. I did not realize from my ignorance and naievity, I was most likely being manipulated by others to take action that would lead to the closing of the office and the destruction of my career iin this field.

When I blew the whistle on unethical behavior by someone in power— prompted by the Vice Chancelorʻs office to do so - following their prompts - the institution chose silence over truth.

The office was shut down.
There was no public explanation.
There was no formal investigation into the harm I experienced, the battery
The person responsible remained protected.

And when the next journal issue came out? It praised the very individual who had caused harm. My name appeared, but not the reality of what I endured to uphold the values I believed in. The community of peers did not speak out for the importance of all of us doing our best to walk the talk and align with ethical behavior.

What Was Suppressed

• I was harmed by someone in a position of power.

• I reported the harm.

• The institution erased both the harm and the reporting.

• I became invisible in the very system I helped shape. 

What I Chose Instead

I walked away from institutional ombudsing, not because I lacked commitment, but because I refused to compromise my integrity.

And I brought everything I had learned with me:

• Into a trauma-informed, harmony-centered model for justice

• Into a comparative framework that included ‘ōlelo Hawaiʻi, hoʻoponopono, and indigenous systems of repair

• Into art, healing, and systems thinking that honor the earth and the ancestors

• Into visionary work that reimagines economics, education, and governance through a relational lens

For Others Who Have Been Silenced

If you too have been erased, suppressed, or punished for telling the truth—know this:

You are not alone.
You are not broken.
You are not the problem.

The system may try to discard what it cannot contain, but we are not discards. We are seeds. And we have been germinating.

Now, we create from outside the old walls. Not as victims. As builders of what comes next.

We honor our voice. We speak in integrity. We remember what the system forgot.

We are the undercarpet. And we are rising.

I left off here, way back when, when the office closed due to a perceived manipulation by a system to come forward as a whistleblower, which ultimately led to a closure of an office, and destruction of a career, and placed lovingly into the next part of the learning journey. This was a crucible moment for the author, with so much love, and radical accepatance, and taking personal responsibility for not having the skills to understand what was occurring, and being too attached to her deep, deep, deep love and respect for this profession.

Below is what I wrote on the Ombuds Circle Website I put up to try and preserve the work, before setting it all aside, to dive where live was taking me next! I set the intention to create a page for each of these, and am using AI to track what happened in my life, to understand myself, not label or name myself, but let others do that for me. 

Stay grounded in wonder, awe, humility, gratitude, and grace and be true to the wonder of it all!

"A few predictable elements in life include birth, death, and unexpected twists and turns. Unexpectedly, I'm no longer directly working in the field of ombudsing. My mysterious muse is having his/her way and I find myself journeying down a different pathway. The skillsket gleaned from my work as an ombudsman is being put to good use as an Artistic Director, Dance Company Manager, and Executive Director of the Future Traditions Foundation.

So, for now, my ombudsing passion simmers on the back burner in an intoxicating and inviting stew of things yet to accomplish in life & I've archived the Ombudsman's Circle.

Perhaps one day in the future there will be another unexpected turn and I'll find myself working in the field again with time for my researching and writing. I'd love to continue with:

The Cross Sector Studies Project

Update the Ombuds Reading Room

Expand the Case Study Library

Expand The Annual Report Library

Update and Refine: Ombuds 101: An "Idiots Guide" to Ombudsing

Expand the Ombuds Profile Project

Revitalize the Ombuds Oral History Project

Recreate the Ombuds Calendar

and bring the Employment Opportunties Page up to date

MISA KELLY: PUBLICATIONS

Reflections of a Budding Ombuds. California Caucus of College and University Ombuds: The Journal (2002)

A Campus Ombuds Profile. Conflict Management in Higher Education Report (2003) 

The Taste of Conversation, an Oral Histoy of Stanley V. Anderson . California Caucus of College and University Ombuds: The Journal (2005) The Cal Caucus limits its paper size to 10 pages. 

Entire Oral History (insert video link)

MISA KELLY: WEBSITE PUBLICATIONS

Ombuds 101: An "Idiots Guide" to Ombudsing (undergoing revision)

The Basic Ombuds Model. CLICK HERE

A Nuts & Bolts Application of the Basic Ombuds Model: an Academic Ombuds Office Study. CLICK HERE

Catch-up' with Ombudsmania: Expanding The Theoretical Base of Ombudsing: Part 1: a Campus Ombuds Process. CLICK HERE

Catch-up' with Ombudsmania: Expanding the Theoretical Base Part 2: Is Ombudsing Like Mediation? CLICK HERE

The Parallel Socio Cultural Evolution of Ombudsing CLICK HERE

The Taste of Conversation, an Oral History of Don Harstock . Work in Progress

The History of the Categorization of Ombudsmen. Work in Progress

CONFERENCE PAPERS

The Case Study Project: Campus Ombuds; What do they do and How do they do it? CLICK HERE FOR PAPER Presented at the California Caucus of College and University Ombuds Annual Conference, Asilomar Conference Grounds THE RIGHT STUFF: The Habit, Heart and Science of Ombudsing (2002)

The Ombuds Profile Project: Campus Ombuds: Who are They? CLICK HERE FOR PAPER Presented at the California Caucus of College and University Ombuds Annual Conference, Asilomar Conference Grounds THE RIGHT STUFF: The Habit, Heart and Science of Ombudsing (2002)

The Basic Ombuds Model and its Set of Ombudsing Principles and Considerations CLICK HERE FOR PAPER Presented at the California Caucus of College and University Ombuds Annual Conference, Asilomar Conference Grounds “Making Our Practice Fit The Times: Celebrating 30 Years” (2003)

Project Updates: The Case Study Project, The Ombuds Profile Project, The Ombudsman Reading and Resource Room. CLICK HERE FOR PAPER Presented at the California Caucus of College and University Ombuds Annual Conference, Asilomar Conference Grounds “Making Our Practice Fit The Times: Celebrating 30 Years” (2003)

CONFERENCE PRESENTATIONS

1) Four Works in Progress 2) Panel Discussion: New Ombuds 3) Creating an Ombuds Resource Library 4) Works-in-Progress: the Journal CCCUO. Presented at the California Caucus of College and University Ombuds Annual Conference, Asilomar Conference Grounds THE RIGHT STUFF: The Habit, Heart and Science of Ombudsing (2002)

2) The Nuts & Bolts of Ombuds Theory 2) Talent Night Presentation: New Works on Paper, Film: Passage. Presented at the California Caucus of College and University Ombuds Annual Conference, Asilomar Conference Grounds “Making Our Practice Fit The Times: Celebrating 30 Years” (2003)

PROJECTS

The Ombudsman Circle

The Case Study Project

The Ombuds Profile Project

The Ombuds Oral History Project

The Ombuds Annual Report Project

The Ombuds Reading and Resource Guide: Click Here for Archive

The Nuts & Bolts of Ombuds Theory

The Stanley V. Anderson Library

The Ombudsman Institution: Cross Sector Studies: Click Here for Archive

Ombuds Calendar and Employment Opportunties Page Click Here for Archive"