Humility and Authority

Humility and Authority 

In many relationships in life, there is a certain power imbalance in which one person, for whatever reason, has more control over what happens to and with another person.  This happens in employment settings, in government, and as we will see here, in parenting.  

For much of the history of the world, parental authority was assumed and absolute.  There are at least four Bible verses that mandate the death penalty for children who disrespect parents and many that require obedience.   But things have changed and parents are often left figuring out on their own exactly when to exert some kind of authority over the basics of eating, sleeping, and using the bathroom, to say nothing of the nuances of conversation.  

So when do we find ourselves saying “Because I said so!”  when the questions and delays and avoidance reach absurd levels? At what point do we override our ideas of autonomy in the interest of safety, civility, health, or plain old common sense?

Authority FigureS

Then there is the problem of others in the system who may or may not be on the same page.  

• “You let them eat how many cookies??”

• “Didn’t we decide bedtime is 8??”

• “I really don’t care if she really wants to watch those horrible videos!!”

• “Didn’t you hear me tell her this was a bad idea?”

Humility

Assuming control over a person or a situation implies that you are right about something and they are not right in the same way.   The rightness may simply be your own personal importance, or hopefully, about the correct response to a situation.  A basic humility suggests an openness to a different fact or reality even if the disagreement involves your child.   Unless they are wrong.  🙂

Yipes.  There is a book here.  But this is all you're are getting from me just now.