BPD is a mental health condition characterised by intense emotional experiences, unstable relationships, and a distorted self-image. Individuals with BPD may struggle with impulsivity, fear of abandonment, and difficulty managing emotions. 

While both involve mood disturbances, BPD is marked by rapid mood shifts triggered by interpersonal stressors, whereas bipolar disorder involves distinct episodes of mania and depression that are not necessarily linked to external events. 

Educate Yourself: Understanding BPD can foster empathy.

Set Boundaries: Maintain clear and consistent boundaries to protect both parties.

Encourage Treatment: Support their journey towards professional help.

Practice Patience: Recognise that progress may be gradual.

Yes. Therapies such as Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) and Mentalisation-Based Therapy (MBT) have shown effectiveness in treating BPD symptoms. 

Yes, absolutely. People with BPD often feel emotions very deeply, including love. However, their intense fears of rejection or abandonment can sometimes make relationships challenging. Their love is real, but may sometimes be expressed in ways that are confusing or overwhelming to others. With understanding and support, healthy relationships are possible.

BPD is diagnosed more often in women, but it affects people of all genders. Some research suggests that women are more likely to seek help or be referred for mental health support, which may lead to higher diagnosis rates. Others believe that BPD in men is often misdiagnosed as something else, such as antisocial or substance-related disorders. 

Romantic relationships can be deeply affected by BPD. Intense emotions, fear of abandonment, and sudden shifts in mood can lead to a cycle of closeness and conflict. A person with BPD might idealise their partner one moment and fear rejection the next. This doesn’t mean they don’t care – it reflects their emotional vulnerability. With good communication, boundaries, and possibly therapy, these relationships can improve and even thrive.

Common signs include intense emotional swings, fear of abandonment, unstable relationships, impulsive behaviours, and a shifting sense of identity. People with BPD may also experience episodes of anger, anxiety, or despair that feel sudden or hard to control. Not everyone will show all these signs, and many of them overlap with other mental health conditions, so a proper diagnosis is essential. 

BPD and Narcissistic Personality Disorder are different. People with BPD often fear being abandoned and may feel deep shame or worthlessness. Those with narcissistic traits might struggle more with empathy and need constant admiration. While both conditions can affect relationships, the emotional needs and root causes are not the same. Only a trained professional can make an accurate diagnosis. 

BPD does appear to run in families, suggesting a possible genetic link. However, genes alone do not cause BPD. Environmental factors, such as childhood experiences and family relationships, also play a key role. Having a relative with BPD does not mean someone will definitely develop it.

BPD is not the same as PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder), but the two can be linked. Many people with BPD have a history of trauma, especially in childhood, which may shape how they see themselves and others. While BPD and PTSD are different diagnoses, they can co-occur, and some experts believe that BPD may be a complex response to long-term trauma in some cases.

Yes. While BPD can be a long-term condition, many people experience significant improvement over time, especially with the right support and treatment. Therapies like Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) and Mentalisation-Based Therapy (MBT) have helped people manage emotions, reduce impulsive behaviours, and build stronger relationships. Recovery doesn’t always mean symptoms disappear entirely, but it often means a more stable, fulfilling life.

Yes. People with BPD can be deeply loving, devoted parents. However, emotional ups and downs may sometimes affect their parenting, especially under stress. With awareness, support, and possibly therapy, many people with BPD can learn to manage these challenges and build healthy, nurturing relationships with their children. It's important to support parents with BPD without judgement.

You may feel this way because the person with BPD can have intense emotional reactions or switch moods quickly. This can lead you to feel unsure of what might “set them off.” It's not your fault. Learning how to communicate clearly and calmly, while also looking after your own emotional needs, can help reduce this feeling over time. You're allowed to feel safe in the relationship too. 

BPD is a complex mental health condition marked by intense emotional responses and difficulties in relationships, identity, and self-regulation.

 The core symptoms typically include:

• Fear of abandonment – Going to great lengths (real or imagined) to avoid being left or rejected.
  
  

• Unstable relationships – Shifting between extreme closeness and sudden distance or conflict.
  
  

• Identity disturbance – An unclear or unstable sense of self, goals, or values.
  
  

• Emotional instability – Intense mood swings, often triggered by seemingly minor events.
  
  

• Chronic feelings of emptiness – A persistent sense of inner void or lack of fulfillment.
  
  

• Impulsive behaviors – Risky actions like spending sprees, unsafe sex, substance use, or binge eating.
  
  

• Intense anger or difficulty controlling it – Frequent outbursts, sarcasm, or bitterness.
  
  

• Dissociation or paranoia under stress – Feeling disconnected from reality or suspicious when overwhelmed.
  
  

These symptoms often begin in early adulthood and can vary in intensity. Not everyone with BPD will experience all of them — but a diagnosis typically involves several of these patterns showing up across different parts of life.

DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy) is one of the most effective and widely used treatments for Borderline Personality Disorder. It was specifically developed to help people manage intense emotions and improve relationships.

Here’s how it works:

• Skills-based approach – DBT teaches practical tools in four core areas:
  
  

  1. Mindfulness – staying present and aware without judgment
     
     

  2. Distress tolerance – coping with crisis without making things worse
     
     

  3. Emotion regulation – understanding and managing intense feelings
     
     

  4. Interpersonal effectiveness – setting boundaries and communicating clearly
     
     

• Validation & change – DBT balances accepting yourself as you are, while also working toward meaningful change — a core reason it’s so effective for BPD.
  
  

• Structured support – It often includes individual therapy, group skills training, and between-session coaching to help apply the skills in real life.
  
  

Many people with BPD report major improvements in relationships, emotional stability, and self-worth through DBT. It takes time, but it works.

Yes, and they can be extremely helpful. Some are online forums or social media groups, while others are run by mental health organisations. In the UK, organisations like Mind, Rethink Mental Illness, and Carers UK may offer information or referrals. Talking to others who understand the challenges can reduce isolation and provide practical advice. See other organisations in other countries listed on the 'Useful Links' page. 

There is no specific medication to treat BPD itself, but some people find medications helpful in managing symptoms like anxiety, depression, or mood swings. Medication is often used alongside therapy, not as a replacement. Treatment should always be personalised and discussed with a mental health professional.

Learn about the condition from evidence-based sources.

Avoid labeling people by their diagnosis.

Advocate for compassion-focused mental health education.

Support individuals seeking treatment — recovery is absolutely possible.

Yes. With appropriate therapy, support, and coping strategies, many individuals with BPD experience significant improvements in their symptoms and quality of life. 

BPD is diagnosed by a licensed mental health professional through a clinical interview. They look for patterns in emotions, relationships, self-image, and behavior based on criteria in the DSM-5 (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders).

To be diagnosed, a person typically needs to meet at least five out of nine core symptoms, showing up over time and across different areas of life. There's no blood test or scan — it's about understanding patterns, not just one moment. A diagnostic tool is used and whilst it may sound simple, it is indeed complex. Online self-help diagnosis tools are not suggested for a condition of this complexity and severity. 

Validation means recognising and accepting someone’s feelings as real and understandable — even if you don’t fully agree or relate.
For someone with BPD, feeling invalidated (dismissed, ignored, or judged) can intensify emotional pain. Validation helps them feel seen and safe.

Here’s how to validate:

• Listen without trying to solve/fix.  They  need to be ready for solutions and may  be vocalising at first because of the emotional build up and turmoil inside.
  
  

• Reflect their feeling: “That sounds really overwhelming.”
  
  

• Avoid saying “just calm down” or “you’re overreacting.”
  
  

• Try: “I can see why that would hurt.” or “That makes sense.”
  
  

Validation doesn’t mean approval — it means empathy.