Recent news inside the country.

Current News in Lemurland.

Strange Object Spotted on Novosilski Glacier, South Georgia

Reports are coming in of a weird, unidentified object found on the Novosilski Glacier in South Georgia. researchers, yourists, and several self-diagnosed autists rushed to the site almost immediately.

Early theories range from “possibly alien” to “some random filth sack that drifted here from another galaxy.” Authorities have sealed off the area and launched a full investigation. people are advised not to touch the object, poke it, lick it, or name it yet. (cuz i already named it ya wankers)

Further updates are expected soon, including the possible announcement of rewards for anyone brave (dumb) enough to get closer under supervision.

Magnitude 4.8 Earthquake Reported; June 2025

A magnitude 4.8 earthquake struck Lemurland in June 2025, briefly shaking parts of the territory and startling many people, including some animals and shit.

No serious damage was reported, though multiple citizens insist their homes were “slightly more to the left than before.” The Lemurland Emergency Response Team (LERT) carried out standard safety procedures, including schizophrenia diagnoses, building checks, and distributing food and supplies to those affected.

Authorities remind everyone to stay calm during aftershocks. outside activity, events and labour remain fully regular during recovery. (fuck yall jk i love yall)

Megaberg A23a Approaching South Georgia

Scientists have confirmed that the massive iceberg A23a, once roughly the size of Rhode Island, is drifting toward South Georgia island, aka the fucking main island of Lemurland.

If the iceberg grounds near the island, it could block critical feeding routes for penguins and stuff. However, if it melts nearby instead, it may stir up nutrients from the ocean floor and actually boost the local ecosystem; potentially great news for seals and penguins.

The Lemurland Natural Protection Council released a statement:

“We’re watching this closely. If this 'berg ends up helping our penguins, we may even celebrate.”

New Antarctic Research Season Begins

The British Antarctic Survey (BAS) has officially launched the 2025–26 Antarctic research season, significantly increasing scientific activity around Antarctica and near South Georgia.

More than 60 research projects are planned, including glacier studies, ice-sheet dynamics, and marine ecosystem monitoring. The Schmidt Ocean Institute is also leading a deep-sea expedition near the South Sandwich Islands, searching for new species and studying seismic activity.

Lemurland’s government issued a supportive response:

“We salute the researchers. If they find new penguin species or accidentally invent a donut business, we want in. if yall mess with us tho we will fucking slime yall."

The Grand Assembly is preparing a research grant program for Lemurland citizens who want to contribute remotely through data analysis or scientific collaboration.

Donald Trump Declared Persona Non Grata in Lemurland

Lemurland City; 23 November 2025.

The Government of Lemurland has officially declared former U.S. President Donald J. Trump persona non grata, effective immediately.

According to a statement from the Lemurlandian Congress, the decision was based on “behaviour, ideology, and general behaviour incompatible with Lemurlandian life, culture, and public safety.” Officials cited racism allegations, inappropriate conduct, disruptive public behaviour, and a political style fundamentally opposed to Lemurland’s anti-fascist principles established after the reforms of 1954.

Security directives have been issued. In the purely hypothetical scenario of Trump attempting to enter Lemurlandian territory, the Red Tail Guard is authorised to initiate standard non-lethal counter-entry procedures.

“This is not a random decision,” the statement concludes. “Lemurland does not tolerate fascism, harassment, or excessive annoyance. also that dude was on the epstein files so yeah.”

The ruling takes effect immediately and remains in force until further notice. (fuck you america)