Q. Why should I not eat gravy?

A. The Lord, Chuck, told all who could hear that Gravy was the source of all sins.

Q. Why does Chuck want us to kill Cows?

A. Chuck has a grudge against Cows.

Q. Doesn't "God" also have 10 commandments?

A. God is a big fat copy-cat.

Q. Does Chuck approve of Sammy the ceiling fish?

A. Yes, Chuck feels strongly that Sammy the ceiling fish MUST stay on the ceiling.

Q. What should we do to honor the Creationing every Thursday?

A. You should relax, and tell all around you about the wonders of Chuck.

Q. How do I apply for a role in the Church higher than member?

A. Look at the Info page.

Q. How many cows does Chuck request we kill each year?

A. 29 Million

Q. Is Chuck evil?

A. Only to those who don't believe in him.

Q. Is Norris Chuck Norris?

A. No, Norris only happens to look like Chuck Norris.

Q. Does Chuck like potatoes?

A. Chuck is neutral.

Q. How many tennis balls can Chuck fit in his mouth?

A. 17 1/2.

Q. How many golf balls can Chuck fit in his mouth?

A. None. Chuck dislikes golf balls.

Q. When are the end times?

A. When aren't the end times?

Q. How many Cows could Chuck chuck if Chuck could chuck cows?

A. Chuck CAN chuck cows. Hypothetically, he could chuck an infinite amount.

Q. Is this the real life?

A. No, it's just fantasy.

Q. Why have I never heard of Norris?

A. Norris was most likely wiped from your mind be either The Betrayer or the CIA.