Lauren Madison
3/29/23
1:35-3:10
Sequence of Events
Ms. Bleicher had spent her prep time and success time clearing out her classroom library and placed all unwanted books on a table in the room. These books were available for students and aids to look through and take home if they'd like and then they were going to be donated. The fifth period didn't mess with the books but when the sixth period came in they all immediately went to the table and began making a mess of the previously organized piles. Ms. Bleicher asked them to clean up the mess which they did for a few moments and then went back to their seats, so I began to clean up the mess.
One or Two Significant Events
Ms. Bleicher asked them what had happened and told them to clean up the mess, making it clear she didn't appreciate their behavior. The students all began to pick it up and then suddenly dispersed even though the mess was nowhere close to being organized. A student who usually sits at that table sat in his seat and watched as everyone else pretended to organize and didn't help when those students went to their seats he sat and complained to the entire class about how it was a mess. I knew Ms. Bleicher was irritated and stressed so I worked on organizing the books and clearing up the space. As I was working on this the student began watching me and making comments like "that's right, clean that mess up," and comments that I could tell he was trying to be funny but had the underlying tone of sexism. This is a student that has made it clear he doesn't respect me and has made sexist comments as well as objectified me with his peers. His comments made me uncomfortable and hurt my feelings just because I knew they were coming from a sexist place. I stopped cleaning up the mess and lightly tossed the book I was holding onto his computer bag and told him I wouldn't touch the mess until he learned to talk to me with some respect. He started claiming that because I tossed the thin children's paperback book on his laptop I had inadvertently abused him. He was still joking and it aligns with his usual behavior in class but I didn't appreciate the accusation in general and I didn't appreciate that he said it in a class where we don't know anyone's home situation. The other students all knew he was being dramatic and a few of them rolled their eyes and dismissed the claims. It was overall just an upsetting situation.
Analysis of Episodes
This isn't the first altercation we've had and Ms. Bleicher even had to step in during one because he didn't want to learn from me. Ms. Bleicher called him out on his sexism and how he's more than willing to learn from Mr.V or Mr. Hammons but when it comes to me he's never been receptive. He said he wasn't receptive to me because I'm still a student same as him and asked why he should respect me if we were on the same level. This episode I think was just kind of my breaking point in terms of the disrespect overall. I thought that sixth period overall really liked me for the most part until some of the girls in the class told me that they all discussed certain aspects of my physical appearance that they found nice. It was just kind of disheartening because the girls assured me that they all love and respect me as a teacher and they wish I could be their teacher but now I feel overwhelmed with the sexism and objectification. I can't change this about my students, I can try to model behavior to try and change how he views women, but I also can't really approach the student and say "hey you seem kind of sexist, let's chat about it." Right now I'm just feeling kind of defeated in this sense because I know I'm going to have to face sexism but I didn't think it'd be so fast or often.