On the surface, real estate appears to be about property — homes, stores, facilities and tracts of land that show great promise as potential development projects. But in the end, it’s really all about people.

For that reason, trust, empathy and sincerity are so important. A handshake seals many deals, a square look in the eye engenders confidence, and a smile telegraphs the genuine emotion you feel when you are able to help a family or small business owner achieve their dreams.

These simple concepts have served me well when negotiating deals and building relationships in the complex and challenging Ontario real estate market, in areas such as St. Catharines, Niagara Falls, Welland, Thorold, Niagara on the Lake, London Ontario, and throughout the Toronto area.

In the U.S., a man named Dale Carnegie knew this well, based on his own astute observations. During the Depression, he published the simple yet groundbreaking book, How to Win Friends and Influence People.

The principles outlined in his book have stood the test of time. Nearly nine decades after he wrote it, the success of any business is still based on human interaction. He outlined these key points for forging close business and personal relationships:

• Don’t criticize, condemn or complain

• Give honest, sincere appreciation

• Arouse in the other person an eager want

• Become genuinely interested in other people

• Smile

• Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language

• Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.

• Talk in terms of the other person’s interests

• Make the other person feel important — and do it sincerely

• The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it

• Show respect for the other person’s opinion. Never say, “You’re wrong.”

• If you are wrong admit it quickly and emphatically

• Begin in a friendly manner

• Get the other person saying, “Yes, yes.”

• Let the other person do a great deal of the talking

• Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers

• Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view

• Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires

• Appeal to the nobler motives

• Dramatize your ideas

• Throw down a challenge

• Begin with praise and honest appreciation

• Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly

• Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person

• Ask questions instead of giving direct orders

• Let the other person save face

• Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be “hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise.”

• Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to

• Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.

• Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.

You probably recognize one or more of these techniques as something you’ve seen successful people practice in your own personal or business life. Or you might have noticed some very famous people following this road map.

Sometimes, it’s no coincidence. Warren Buffet, for example, is a graduate of the Dale Carnegie Institute course that is based on the book. He credits it with teaching him the mechanics of building rewarding relationships by showing others they are respected, appreciated, and important in his eyes.

“Rewarding” is exactly the right word when describing his many successful ventures — all of which are based on trust, empathy and sincerity.