The Popcorn Trials
May 16, 2013
[narniagirl11 edited out a book discussion that took place in the middle of the trials]
Tenethia: *shares around popcorn* boy, it's quiet in here again
Kestrel: Am I guilty?
Tenethia: of not coming around much, or of making it quiet, or of something else?
Tenethia: *puts on Judge Tenny hat* You, Kestrel Hawkness, art hereby charged of the crimes of 1. not coming around much 2. making the chatroom quiet. and 3. Something unknown. How do you plead?
Kristi: And of not partaking of the popcorn
Kristi: CONFORM
Tenethia: oh that's right
Kristi: Oh wait, is that the sentence?
Tenethia: GASP
Kristi: Sentence first, verdict afterwards?
The Happy Islander: Popcorn should be the sentence. *nods wisely*
The Happy Islander: Yes, sentence first!
Tenethia: *Shrugs* this is Judge Tenny. I really don't know anything about being one, but it's worth a shot
Kestrel: Can I plead somewhat guilty?
Tenethia: *peers*
Tenethia: *speaks with the jury*
The Happy Islander: We can wait for the verdict until after the popcorn's all been eaten
Kestrel: Yes, let's. I'm not the world's greatest fan of popcorn.
The Happy Islander: *is hungry* *will eat popcorn for you*
Tenethia: *iz on her second full bag today; loves her kind, loving, popcorn giving neighbor*
Tenethia: Kestrel Hawkness, you have pled guilty on all accounts. Do you have anything to say in your defense? (/I/ wouldn't...)
Tenethia: (I added the guilty on all accounts, since that just makes it easier)
Tenethia: (*iz JUST*)
Kestrel: (Why didn't I do Mock Trial? -.-)
Tenethia: *snicker*
Kestrel: To the first accusation, I can only say that a certain program entitled Speech and Debate has prohibited me from 'coming around much'.
Kestrel: To the second, THAT IS NOT MY FAULT
Kestrel: And to the third...well...I plead totally and completely guilty. I probably did /something/ today...
Tenethia: Kestrell Hawkness, who would you accuse of the second crime?
The Happy Islander: The second was prolly the giraffe's fault for being too big and scary.
Tenethia: I'd have to agree. Arrest that giraffe!
Kestrel: I do agree with the personage The Happy Islander, otherwise known as Islie.
The Happy Islander: Hee
Tenethia: (*bonks chat*)
The Happy Islander: *is /such/ a scary harmless giraffe!*
Tenethia: arrest that giraffe!
Tenethia: (her trial to be held afterwards)
Kestrel: Yes, Your Honor.
Tenethia: I was talking to Hummy
The Happy Islander: *is bigger and scarier than Hummy*
Tenethia: you remain where you are, Kestrel Hawkness
Tenethia: Engee! Arrest Islie!
Tenethia: with Hummy's help
narniagirl11: Woah!
narniagirl11: Why? What did you do?
The Happy Islander: I was big.
Tenethia: she's being tried after this next trial is finished
Tenethia: for making everyone in the chatroom go quiet because she was too big, and harmlessly scary
narniagirl11: Who are you trying first?
Tenethia: Kestrel Hawkness
narniagirl11: *refuses to arrest her giraffe buddy* You'll have to arrest me too!
Tenethia: Kestrel Hawkness, I hereby proclaim you innocent of the second accusation
Tenethia: *arrests Engee /and/ Islie*
Tenethia: (and don't you even /try/ to resist arrest, you guys)
Tenethia: (you've got a big enough rap as it is)
The Happy Islander: Hey, I willingly admitted to being a big, scary, harmless giraffe.
narniagirl11: Pleading guilty?
The Happy Islander: *is arrested* *noms on the bars of her cell*
Kestrel: *just noticed that I never was actually arrested*
Tenethia: ugh
The Happy Islander: Yuck! Giraffes do /not/ like metal bars!
narniagirl11: Are they pretzel?
The Happy Islander: Somebody should feed the giraffe.
narniagirl11: Oh, I guess that answers it.
The Happy Islander: Where'd that popcorn go?
Kestrel: Kestrelhawks don't bother with cell bars unless they're CAGE bars...
Tenethia: Kestrel Hawkness, you have pleaded guilty to the other two crimes. I hereby sentence you to... feed the giraffe!
Kestrel: What do I feed the giraffe, Your Honor?
The Happy Islander: Feed the giraffe with popcorn!
Tenethia: Popcorn, Kestrel Hawkness
narniagirl11: Lol!
The Happy Islander: Popcorn! Popcorn!
Tenethia: Take her away, officer
narniagirl11: What officer?
The Happy Islander: Good question, Arna
Tenethia: the invisible one
Tenethia: Narniagirl11, please proceed to the... somethingorother
The Happy Islander: *will share popcorn with Arna*
Tenethia: (poor jars of clay - walking in on this.)
The Happy Islander: *hopes we didn't scare jarsofclay away with our insanity*
Tenethia: (yeah, Islie)
Kestrel: *flies in a bag of popcorn to the imprisoned giraffe*
Tenethia: Narniagirl11, you are accused of nothing. How do you plead?
narniagirl11: Uh, guilty for refusing to arrest Islie.
The Happy Islander: Oh, goody! Popcorn! *nom, nom!* Thankee, Kestrel! *shares popcorn with Arna*
narniagirl11: Nom, nom, yeah ;D
Tenethia: Narnia Girl Eleven, you have pleaded guilty.
narniagirl11: Yep
Tenethia: I hereby sentence you to grab this chat log as soon as I have tried Islie
The Happy Islander: .oO (We's a bunch of criminals?)
Tenethia: Yup
narniagirl11: I have to go. I'll be back in a bit.
The Happy Islander: *hugs Arna*
Tenethia: (ok, just please don't forget )
Tenethia: *hugs Engee*
narniagirl11: *beings to sing* We are criminals! *poofs*
Kestrel: Did the defendant just...leave?
Tenethia: what's a defendant?
Kestrel: Never mind...*bops internet*
Kestrel: The person being accused
Tenethia: Happy Islander, please proceed to the whatchamacallit
The Happy Islander: *proceeds to said whatchamacallit, narrowly missing hitting her head on a stray chandelier or two*
Tenethia: haha
The Happy Islander: *wonders if Tenny's a criminal as well*
Tenethia: Happy Islander, you have been accused of the not-crime of being big and scary. How do you plead?
Tenethia: (does impersonating a judge count as a crime?)
The Happy Islander: (sure)
The Happy Islander: I plead guilty of being a tall giraffe.
The Happy Islander: Well, short for a giraffe, but rather taller than anyone else present.
Tenethia: Islie, you have pleaded guilty. I hereby sentence you to be yourself, leave prison, and... eat the rest of that popcorn
The Happy Islander: Oh, ok. *leaves prison and eats popcorn* *nom, nom!*
Tenethia: *takes off judge hat*
Kestrel: My Attorney friends in Youth in Government force-taught me some of the language of the court
The Happy Islander: I think Tenny should get a trial, too, so she doesn't feel left out.
Tenethia: be back after a little bit
Tenethia: (in a couple minutes mom needs her computer)
The Happy Islander: *hugs Tenny*
Tenethia: *Goes mobile*
Tenethia: *hands Islie the judge hat*
The Happy Islander: Kristi, it appears that me being taller than everyone else present is a criminal offense.
Kristi: Yes.
The Happy Islander: *puts on judge hat* Who am I judging? Tenny?
Tenethia: apparently. I trust you
Kestrel: And the crime is?
The Happy Islander: *doesn't want to be a judge* *hands judge hat to Kestrel*
The Happy Islander: *hides from judge hat*
Kestrel: *puts on judge hat*
The Happy Islander: Eep! Scary judge hat!
Kestrel: *somehow judge hat slips over kestrelhawk's tiny birdie head*
Tenethia: *hides from Kestrel*
Kestrel: Tenethia South, you stand accused of the not-crime-at-all of not having been tried yet. How do you plead?
Tenethia: *weeps* guilty
The Happy Islander: *hands weeping hobbit-horse a handkerchief*
Tenethia: *takes*
The Happy Islander: oO(Does Kristi get a trial too?)
Tenethia: YES KRISTI TRIAL! YESYESYES
Kestrel: (if she wants one)
Kestrel: (although i'm a harsh judge so...)
The Happy Islander: We have to finish /your/ trial first, Ten.
Tenethia: *giggles*
Kestrel: Are there any witnesses to this crime? If so, please step forward.
The Happy Islander: Uh...
Tenethia: Islie chooses to be a silent witness
The Happy Islander: Oh
Kestrel: As long as The Happy Islander was a witness to the defendant Tenethia South's not-crime of not having been tried, we are good to go.
The Happy Islander: goody
Kestrel: Tenethia South, you have been tried and found guilty of the not-crime-at-all of not having had a trial yet.
Tenethia: yup that's right
Kestrel: I hereby pronounce this sentence: You have now been tried, so the charge is invalid. However, there must be a sentence, and the judgehawk is hungry, so...
Kestrel: You must bring some not-popcorn food to the judgekestrelhawk.
Tenethia: *hands popcorn*
The Happy Islander: .oO(What would Kristi be guilty of? Can't exactly try her for liking good values in books)
Tenethia: Kristi is guilty of being not guilty
The Happy Islander: Wait, Kristi hasn't been tried yet, dear!
The Happy Islander: She can be accused of being not guilty, but she can't be found to be guilty of being not-guilty until she's been tried.
Tenethia: oh
narniagirl11: *is back*
Tenethia: *hands brownies*
The Happy Islander: Hi, Arna! We're having more trials!
The Happy Islander: Apparently we like this game.
Kestrel: That poses a paradox...
Tenethia: please none of those
Kestrel: If she's found to be guilty of being not-guilty, she is no longer guilty of being not-guilty, which means she's not guilty, which means that she's guilty...
Kestrel: ARGHHHHHHHH
narniagirl11: Yikes!
narniagirl11: That's...complicated.
The Happy Islander: (Ten, here's some non-popcorn lollipops to offer Kes)
Kestrel: Idea!
Tenethia: I should place charges on Islie for doing some paradoxy
The Happy Islander: Hey, I've /already/ had my trial! It's Kristi's turn!
Tenethia: and Kestrel for bringing it up
Kestrel: Let us charge Kristi Fisherdess with the charge of inducing a paradox on the community!
Kristi: i must go. Photos to take for work!
Tenethia: riiiiiight
narniagirl11: *smirk*
Kestrel: And...there goes the defendant.
The Happy Islander: *hugs Kristi*
Kestrel: *snugs Kristi*
Tenethia: YES! We can place her on house arrest
The Happy Islander: Ha!
Kestrel: Good idea tenny!
Tenethia: *hugs Kristi* you are found guilty by the jury and are now under house arrest. bye!
The Happy Islander: Somebody had better remember to tell Kristi that she's under house arrest when she gets back.
Tenethia: yeah
narniagirl11: Haha
The Happy Islander: We're NEVER insane around here...
narniagirl11: Riiiight!
Kestrel: Of course not.
Tenethia: neeeever
The Happy Islander: *thinks that a TLC-size dose of insanity is good for the health*
Tenethia: it is
narniagirl11: Very much so, Islie.
Addendum, May 17, 2013
The Happy Islander: Oh, by the way, Kristi, did anyone tell you that Tenny and Kestrel placed you under house arrest last night?
The Happy Islander: .oO(We got a little carried away with our trials last night... Tenny and Kes were interesting judges)
Kristi: Whose house?
The Happy Islander: *doesn't know* :p
Ajnos: Can she be house arrested in my house?
The Happy Islander: I was just the giraffe who was found guilty of being significantly taller than everyone else present. :p
The Happy Islander: @Aj: That... could be cool :)
Kristi: Ooh yes
Kristi: As long as the government pays for transport
The Happy Islander: Hee :)
Kristi: oh wait...we are the government.
The Happy Islander: :p
Ajnos: Also that would be kinda illegal
The Happy Islander: Heh
Ajnos: Official college rules say you're not allowed guests staying in your room. Though technically...she's not a guest.
The Happy Islander: *snerks*
Ajnos: The rules say nothing about prisoners
The Happy Islander: Well, Kristi's allowed to be house arrested at /my/ house! :p
The Happy Islander: Hee :)