2022-23

This 2022-23 school year was a rollercoaster. It was a mix of new friendships, emotions, clubs, activities, etc. I felt as if everything that happened needed to happen for me to get to where I am now. To start off, the first semester I was going through many emotions with not being at home, not having my home friends, being in a different environment, making new friends, and not being in the safety of my hometown. I had many friends, but during that time it felt more like they were acquaintances than anything. It was quite difficult to deal with and I had many breakdowns and calls to family. During that semester I also had a dance course on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday at 8:00 A.M., which impacted my mental health in a negative way because I didn't have the motivation to go work out or eat healthily nor did I get good sleep either. Overall I wasn’t in a very good headspace and found myself struggling.

Thankfully, when winter break hit, I was so grateful to go back home and be in my safety net again. Afterwards, when winter break had ended and I was moving into a new dorm, I met a new friend while doing so. It turned out, I needed to meet her because she helped me turn my second semester around so much. She and I began hanging out more and more and became closer as we did. I was grateful for our meeting. This helped make my second semester better than the first. In addition to making a new friend, I had time to work out in the mornings or afternoons because of my new schedule. I also made time to get work done, eat healthier, do activities alone and be okay with spending time individually. During this semester, I was able to take the honors study abroad course: Experiencing the Austrian Empire in Music. I got to meet more like-minded people who were similar to me which is why I enjoyed myself a great deal.  This course helped us create new friendships because of how small the enrollment was, about 15 students, so when we spent time together each week (outside of class too), we were able to become more comfortable with each other. My semester had significantly improved emotionally, mentally, and physically. 

I grew in many ways, but emotionally and mentally were the big ones. Emotionally, I was not doing very well in the first semester and I had many feelings about being by myself in a new area, not doing interesting things on the weekend, etc etc. However, in the second semester I had a more positive view on everything overall. I hung out with my new friends, I went to multiple College-Conservatory of Music (CCM) shows, friends and I got food and relaxed, or we walked around campus. I didn’t care if I wasn’t doing anything with someone on the weekend, because I was okay with being by myself and taking breaks for my well being and recharging myself. Mentally, I was great because I allowed myself to be satisfied with being in for the night, doing homework, or watching netflix because I was excited to do it and take time to be with myself.

I demonstrated my resilience to move forward from first semester to second semester and onwards. First semester was horrible and I needed to make sure I didn't feel that way ever again. By being content with myself to stay in on weekends, I allowed myself to recuperate. Having those weekends in made it even better. I will continue to utilize resources such as meditation to help me stay balanced because it allows me to be in a different headspace and evaluate my life in a different light. Having my nephew improved my mood signifcantyy at times becuse I would see him on facetime and get so excited and he always lifted my mood no matter what. I also will continue to talk to family and friends more while being able to show my emotions without feeling the need to bottle them up.