What I Hate About Soccer

What I Hate About Soccer

What I hate about soccer

Is being kicked in the shin

Kneed in the tummy

Poked in the eye and

Elbowed in the chin

Missing a header ‘cause it hit my nose

Busting my fingers

Breaking my toes

Practicing for hours in the cold and rain

Frostbitten and weary and wracked with pain

What I hate about soccer

Is mud and dirt and despair

Tripping and sliding and flailing like a clown

When someone’s grabbing my hair

There’s no time outs and no substitutes and

I’m thirsty as heck- the refs in cahoots

To throw the game to the enemy

Why is this debacle happening to me

But when the whistle blows

With the team still ahead

I love this sport please disregard

All the things I’ve said