I have been working as an early childhood educator for almost 20 years, and I would like to share some of the comments and feedback that I, along with many other educators, frequently hear. 

It often begins with, “Oh! You’re a preschool teacher?” followed by an “Aw!” and a look of pity, as if being a preschool teacher is a less respectable career choice and I have brought shame to my family. Sometimes, the reaction is a poorly disguised look of surprise, as if I had just admitted to being a juggler on a boat passing through menacing, crocodile-infested waters.

Here are some of the most common comments…

“That’s awesome! So you play with the children all day?” (Yes, Susan, “I play with the children all day”. Because apparently, I do not have a real job… I don’t have any responsibilities or goals. I’ve always wanted to be an educator because of all the cool toys in schools!)

This comment upsets me because I love what I do and I truly believe I have the best job in the world… I just wish more people realised how hard we, early childhood educators, work and that play-based learning is an actual method and children DO learn from it!

Play-based learning is the scaffolding of education; we can’t expect children to write if they haven’t learned to hold a pencil. Learning comes naturally through play. According to the European Commission on Early Childhood Education and Care (ECEC), play-based learning significantly boosts children’s cognitive, social, and emotional development, laying an essential foundation for lifelong learning and adaptation. Children are naturally curious, and education should harness that curiosity to help them understand how the world works.

… and then we get to: “You must be so patient! I could never…” (Really, Mark!? Considering you just spent the last 31 minutes lecturing me on how I should be teaching and how the educational system is broken, I’d say you actually believe you know more about education and teaching than I do, despite my degrees in education.)

As an educator, it can be really frustrating when others don’t listen to our opinions about education. Parents, students, and society itself often have a say in how things should be done in schools. But unfortunately, educators and teachers don’t always get a chance to share their thoughts, even though they know a lot from their experience.

Research has highlighted the challenge that teachers often face in having their opinions and expertise recognised and valued in educational decision-making processes. A study by Ingersoll (2003) emphasised the importance of including teachers’ voices in educational reforms and policy development. This study found that teachers, despite their valuable on-the-ground experience, are frequently overlooked in discussions regarding educational changes.

Another study by Day and Gu (2014) explored the impact of teachers feeling marginalised and unheard in school settings. This study revealed that when teachers believe their opinions are not considered important, it can lead to decreased job satisfaction and well-being, ultimately affecting the quality of education they provide.

Both these studies illustrate the significant impact of undervaluing teachers’ experiences and perspectives in the education system.

Besides not always having their opinions taken into consideration, teachers face many other difficulties, such as heavy workloads, insufficient support, and low pay. The COVID-19 pandemic has made these problems worse, causing many teachers to feel burned out. This leads to serious issues: unstable classrooms, less teamwork, and lower quality of education.

… which brings us to the next frequent comment: “It must be nice to have a 3-month holiday!” (Yeah, Deborah! That sounds amazing… but I wouldn’t know, you see, I only get 5 weeks off, and I have to take 2 weeks in December and 3 weeks in August. I can’t even choose my own holidays! Plus, most of the time during my holidays, I’m busy looking for activities and planning for the next semesters or the next school year. Anyway… Lucky me! Why am I even complaining?!)

Why are teachers quitting? I get it… I really get it!

I often find myself caught in this frustrating paradox: on one hand, society seems to overlook the challenges and sacrifices we educators face daily. On the other hand, we are always facing unrealistic expectations and demands that hurt our physical and emotional health.

And I know the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence, but it feels like I’m judged even more harshly for being an early childhood educator. It’s as if, because I help smaller children develop, my work is somehow less important!

Think of preschool learning as laying a strong foundation for a house. Without a solid base, the structure becomes unstable and prone to collapse. Similarly, early education sets the groundwork for future learning, providing children with essential skills and knowledge that they will build upon as they progress through secondary school and beyond.

“Oh? You don’t have kids of your own… should I really be trusting you with mine then?” (Hahaha… I’d say yes, Barbara. Considering I spent 5 years at university and invested in many courses and training on child health, development, psychology, and more.)

I have heard this comment way too many times, and it should be avoided at all costs! To anyone thinking about saying it, remember that teachers have invested a lot of time and money in their training. They are trained to be teachers, not parents. Having children and experiencing parenthood does not make you a teacher. Teachers do more than just stand in front of a class and tell children what to do.

Most importantly, you do not know if the person you are talking to has experienced loss or is unable to have children. Such a comment could be doubly hurtful. 

Disclaimer: The examples of comments are based on true events and reflect the author’s memories of experiences over time. Names and details have been changed, and some dialogue has been recreated for dramatic (and comedic) purposes.