In traditional books, we often encounter phrases like “the wicked stepmother”… unfortunately, these stories often portray stepmothers and step siblings as unkind. Though seemingly harmless in fairy tales, such language can reinforce negative stereotypes about blended families. Not to mention, the fact that female characters in traditional stories often escape their miserable lives by marrying a prince which perpetuates unrealistic ideas that marriage is the solution for all problems and that men are the only ones who can save them.

Educators play a vital role in creating a safe connection between home and school. By carefully choosing our words, we can strengthen this bond and create a learning environment that is inclusive and welcoming to all students, regardless of their family backgrounds or personal experiences. Using terms like “real” children can make students from non-traditional families or diverse backgrounds feel excluded. 

Fortunately, more and more authors are choosing inclusive vocabulary, and perhaps it is time to reconsider the books in our home and school libraries. No… I am not suggesting that we should ban traditional stories! However, it is important to keep in mind that stories such as Little Red Riding Hood (1697), Snow White (1812), and Cinderella (1634) were published more than two centuries ago and were Cautionary Tales. These tales were essentially folklore stories told to warn listeners of dangers… and they were more focused on adults. So, maybe we could introduce them to older children, and add context, for example: “This was how people thought, a very long time ago, but now we know that […]” (here you can find an article that explores the benefits and challenges of incorporating fairy tales, emphasizing the need for critical and inclusive approaches to address outdated representations while harnessing the potential of multicultural tales for contemporary classrooms). 

And let’s not forget the importance of avoiding assumptions! For instance, saying “Babies grow inside mummy’s tummy” may exclude transgender parents (although less common, there are fathers who have given birth to their children). Similarly, using phrases like “Boys will be boys!” or “Girls are so calm!” perpetuate harmful stereotypes and may unintentionally leave out students who identify as non-binary or gender non-conforming.

The power of language in shaping attitudes and perceptions is undeniable, so it’s essential for us to reflect on the impact of our words and strive to create an environment where everyone feels seen, heard, and valued. We should challenge ourselves to be mindful of the language we use, to question stereotypes, and to embrace the diversity inside and outside of the classrooms. By doing this, we not only make a classroom where everyone feels welcome, but we also help our children learn to be kind and understanding in the world. As someone told me once: “Teaching is important but creating inclusive learning is importantER.”