*** items in parenthesis are notes for the chair, do not read them.
Opening
Welcome to the Sunday night meeting of Debtors and Spenders Anonymous. My name is ______________ and I am a debtor and compulsive spender. This is a 12-step group based on the principles of Alcoholics Anonymous. This is a virtual meeting so please keep yourself on mute if you are not speaking. Thank you.
Debtors Anonymous offers hope for people whose use of unsecured debt causes problems and suffering. We come to learn that compulsive debting and spending is a spiritual problem with a spiritual solution, and we find relief by working the D.A. recovery program based on the Twelve-Step principles.
The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop incurring unsecured debt. Even if members are not in debt, they are welcome in D.A. What we have in common is our need to work towards serenity in our relationship with money. Our experience is that we cannot do this alone. By sharing our experience, strength, and hope, and by carrying the message to those who still suffer, we find joy, clarity, and serenity as we recover together.
We offer a special welcome if you are new to this program. It takes courage to come here and we know what it’s like to take that first step in recovery.
Please respect the anonymity of the members of this group. Who you see here, what you hear here, must be held in confidence. Only then are we free to share openly what is in our hearts and minds.
We’ll have a moment of silence and then those who wish may join me in the serenity prayer:
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change
The courage to change the things I can
And the wisdom to know the difference
Newcomer Introductions
Now it is time for newcomer introductions, if you are new to debtors anonymous or to this meeting please say so, and we will welcome you. (Pause for 3-5 minutes for newcomers only introductions (popcorn style))
DA is an anonymous program; however, we do know that contact with others in our group is vital to our recovery. If you would like to share
phone numbers or email addresses with the group you can do so by
leaving them in the chat window.
In the meeting we focus on the desire to compulsively spend. Some of us spend compulsively, or take on debt that we do not know how to repay. Some of us lack the confidence in our ability to earn money, while others have money, but lack the ability to manage it sanely.
Announcements:
Thursday Night Step Study Group is at 6:30pm Pacific Time and uses this meetings zoom link. Are there any other announcements (pause for a few seconds)?
We have a PRG contact spreadsheet. We are convinced that debtors of our type are in the grip of a progressive illness. Our experience is that this is the program that works.
12-Steps Reading
May I have a volunteer read the 12 steps? They will be posted on the zoom screen and all our documents are available in the Debtors Anonymous website, debtorsanonymous.org.
Traditions reading
May I have someone read the tradition of the month? This is the _____ month. (post on zoom)
Signs of Compulsive Debting Reading
May I have someone read the 12 Signs of Compulsive Debting?
Tools Reading
We have tools to help us work and live the program. In this meeting we will use both the DA tools and the Spender’s Anonymous tools. May I have someone read the tools of the D.A. program? Please read the names of all twelve tools, and then pick one tool to read in its entirety.
The 15 tools of the Spender’s Anonymous program are: Abstinence - Anonymity - Exercise - Humor - Meditation - Meetings - Phone Calls - Play - Prayer - Readings - Service - Slogans - Sponsorship - Writing.
Using the tools our weekly format is as follows: (read only the applicable week)
Week 1: Tools 2, 4, and 5: Spending plans and PRGs
(only read during week one) What is a spending plan? A spending plan gives us a blueprint for financial recovery and provides a guideline for spending in each area of our life. There is a world of difference between a spending plan and a budget. Budgeting connotes holding back, scrimping, and depriving ourselves, whereas a spending plan enables us to choose how we want to spend our money. - (do a reading from Kindle DA Pamphlets on spending plans, PRG, keeping numbers, etc..) (run reading until 6:23)
Week 2: Tool 10: Business meeting
(only read during week 2) We attend business meetings that are held monthly. Many of us have long harbored feelings that “business” was not a part of our lives but for others more qualified. Yet participation in running our own program teaches us how our organization operates, and also helps us to become responsible for our own recovery.
Every member’s voice is important at a business meeting to ensure that the group conscience is in force.
(Our business meeting agenda follows DA’s format.) (Run business meeting until it wraps up (no later than 6:25))
Week 3: Tools 1 and 8: Step Writing (questions will be shared)
(only read during week 3) As compulsive debtors, we experienced the pain of our debting and spending behaviors. Our debting may have manifested in our lives in the form of unpaid credit card debt or student loans, compulsive shopping, overspending, or chronic underearning. Many of us identified with several of these problems that lead to compulsive debting. By the time we reached our first DA meeting, most of us felt beaten by our debting issues. In Debtors Anonymous we found strength and hope in the support of others who understood our problem and also a common solution - one that works. Our solution is a spiritual program of recovery using the 12 steps. Questions (allow until 6:23 for everyone to answer questions)
Week 4: Tool 3: Speaker or Readings
(read only during week 4) Before coming to Debtors Anonymous, many of us isolated ourselves from other people. We thought we were self-sufficient and knew all of the answers. Of course, this so-called self-sufficiency led us to DA in need of help. In the first step of our recovery we admit that we are powerless over debt and that our lives are unmanageable. We learn to ask for help and we benefit from asking. Using the telephone is the easiest way to reach out at any time to ask for help from other recovering debtors. When we make calls, we often find solutions to problems, support in taking difficult steps, or courage to overcome fear. Many of us find that the simple act of talking about our feelings, thoughts, and actions gives us renewed serenity, even though we see no visible “result” or "action". In this vein, on the fifth week we ask members to share their experience, strength, and hope to remind us we cannot do it alone. (If we have a speaker they will share for 10 minutes)
Week 5: Spenders tool: Meditations/Visions (see meditation page)
(only read during week 5) In Debtor’s Anonymous, vision may be thought of as the ability to form a clear and specific picture of what we want to do in life, what we want to obtain, create, achieve, or accomplish. It’s knowing where we’re going. Our vision is our mission, our dream, and our goals - as they have been revealed to us by our Higher Power. Each person’s vision is entirely unique and yet all serve the common goal. In addition to not debting, we seek our vision and the quality of life described in the DA Promises - “When we work this program with integrity and to the best of our ability, one day at a time, a life of prosperity and serenity will be ours.” (end mediation at 6:23)
Sharing (Start Sharing at 6:23):
The meeting is now open for sharing. Shares are 3 minutes with a 1 minute warning. Please keep the focus on your recovery in Debtors or Spenders Anonymous. Also when sharing be mindful of the temptation of others and avoid mentioning any “good deals” you received, sales you shopped, or items you’ve purchased. In this program we are trying to avoid spending on items that are not a part of our spending plans.
Please avoid cross talk. DA defines cross talk as interrupting or giving advice, or commenting to another person during their share. We reserve the last 10 minutes of our share time for newcomers though newcomers are welcome to share at any time. May I have a volunteer to be timekeeper? Please give a verbal one minute warning.
The floor is now open for sharing. However, keep in mind if we don't get your share by 6:53 some of us stay after the meeting and we will hear your share.
(Run share time until 6:40, stop for newcomers, then continue until 6:53pm)
Closing
The opinions expressed here tonight are those of the person who gives them. Take what you like and leave the rest. Let there be no gossip or criticism among us, but let the love, understanding and peace of the program grow us, one day at a time.
(Pick One) May I have someone read the 12 promises of Debtor’s Anonymous? OR May I have someone read Promises of Spenders Anonymous?
Our treasurer will post a link on how to contribute to 7th tradition.
Making commitments to this group can help our recovery; we will go around the Zoom and make one commitment for the week. Please avoid saying your name for time. (Pause for 3-5 minutes for commitments).
Thank you for allowing me to be your trusted servant for this meeting. After a moment of silence, we will close with a prayer to ask Higher Power to guide our spending.
Higher Power, Help me spend wisely and to buy fairly
Remembering that money and the things of this world are a trust from you
To be used as you would have me use them.
And help me also remember that the best things in life are not things
Thy will not mine, be done.