Never Passive When Active Will Do

NEVER  USE THE  PASSIVE  WHEN  YOU  CAN  USE  THE  ACTIVE

   Why write

                           "She was going to the store for her mother"

when

 "She skipped down the sidewalk, careful not to step on any cracks, heading to the 

Change

"He was reading a book while he was eating. "

to

"He shoved another potato chip in his mouth and turned the page. "

Of course, there are those times in a story where "to be" is called for. Oops! Change that!

" Of course, you may find you need to use the "to be" verb in your narrative."

[Notice I changed the "there are" in the process of rewriting the sentence. Another pet peeve.

"It was a dark and stormy night" won that famous worst-opening-line in-a-novel contest for a reason! Avoid using "there are/was/were" and "it was/is" and find a more creative way to express yourself.]

I have an assignment for you. Open your latest opus, click on "Find" (right hand screen in "Home" in MS Word), and type "was" in the box. Now click on "Find Next". Every time you find a "was" read the context and change the "was whatever" to an action verb.

And remember, you will need the "to be" verb, but reserve it for that special use! If not, your writing will become stale. Never give a reader an excuse to put down your book! Show the action, don't just tell us about it!

(Excerpt for Mary Lois Sander's blog The Other Zone)