April 8, 2026

I’m not sure when it happened, but I remember waking up one day in Kyrgyzstan and realizing I peeled potatoes and cut fruit like my mother. It’s the signature style of any Italian mom—holding the fruit or vegetable in one hand and a knife in the other as they seemingly cut into their hand with each slice. The realization was alarming, and it almost felt like a signal of my adulthood. When did I stop fearing that I would cut myself, or gain the precision to only peel the skin off the potato and not my hand? I never remember being taught the technique, but as I’ve prepared potatoes over the past couple months I am always brought back to seeing my mother in the kitchen. 

There have been countless times throughout my life where I have looked back to see my mother, literally or figuratively, teaching and watching over me. Whether it be my accomplishments in school, my failures with romantic partners, or even my relationships with friends, my mom always seems to be there. This presence is one I have taken for granted in the past, but as the years press on I see more and more how much my mom has influenced my life for good. 

On March 13th, my mom made the arduous journey from Denver, Colorado to Bishkek, Kyrgyzstan. In typical Karyn fashion, she stepped off the plane in stylish boots and a full face of makeup, ready to fight the taxi drivers trying to take her bags. On our first day together, I fully cried in a public restaurant and held my mom’s hand across the table. People probably thought I was experiencing a mental breakdown, but I just couldn’t believe my mom was in Kyrgyzstan! Over the next two weeks, we explored bazaars and banyas (bathhouses), shopped in just about every mall we could find, and traveled to Issyk-Kul in a car with 5 people and a Chihuahua. We experienced multiple setbacks on our trip, and true to the Kyrgyz nature, were late for a lot of appointments, but my mom bore it all with a smile and witty joke. When our car broke down after a tour in Issyk-Kul (twice), my mom patiently waited for us to find someone with jumper cables, and taught us how to jump the car without electrocuting ourselves. She always thanked our waiters and waitresses with an excited “сосиска” which means “sausage” but sounds very similar to “cпасибо” which means “thank you.” 

Having my mom in Kyrgyzstan helped me to realize the value of seeing a country with fresh eyes, whether it be the people, food, or overall culture. As part of our adventures in Issyk-Kul, we visited the home of my friend’s parents, who live in Karakol. My friend’s father, aside from being famous on Youtube for building his own cars, also grows apples and dries them himself. We received a huge bag of apples as part of our visit, and my mom made some delicious applesauce with them. I brought her to school one day so my students could meet her, and after talking with a friend I realized she was no longer by my side. I looked for her, frustrated that she would leave and confused about where she had gone. My frustration evaporated when I found her sitting by the security guard, handing him extra apples from our stash. I had never met the guard before, but he now says hi to me every time he sees me. 

For the past 7 months, I have been trying to figure out the Kyrgyz way of life and culture, but as it turns out, I didn’t need to look farther than my own mother. She embodies Kyrgyz love and hospitality better than I ever could, and her kindness to the security guard is just one example out of many that I have witnessed throughout my life. My mother is the strongest, most selfless person I have ever met. Though we are thousands of miles apart, I have found myself relying on her almost daily for comfort and advice. She has truly seen me at my worst, and celebrated me at my best. Words can’t describe how lucky I feel to be her daughter, though sometimes I feel like I have big shoes to fill. 

These experiences have left me reflecting, as I often do, on all the lessons I “could’ve” or “should’ve” learned before Kyrgyzstan. Did I really need to travel over an ocean to learn the value of hospitality, or understand a culture outside of my own? Did I need Kyrgyzstan to teach me how to live on my own and or be resourceful? If I had learned these lessons earlier, it definitely would’ve saved me time and money. The truth is, even if I could’ve learned all these lessons back in the comfort of my bubble back home, I would have lost so much more. Coming here, traveling away from my family and friends, has brought immeasurable difficulties, but also more growth that I thought myself capable of. 

Put simply, my Fulbright saved my life. In the year before my travels, I struggled immensely with my sense of self-worth, and my decisions often reflected that. Looking back, I see how much I “self-abandoned,” or hurt myself because of these choices. I was starting to become unrecognizable, and not just to myself, but also to my family and friends. It often felt like a slope I could see myself sliding down, but couldn’t really stop. Kyrgyzstan pulled me out of this cycle, gave me time to process the past two years of my life, and accept all the decisions that I have made. I find that there are still lots of things I need to work through, but I am proud of the person I am becoming. And what is life but a giant process of becoming! Each of us has an incredible opportunity to wake up each day and start anew. I don’t think I really believed this until I desperately needed to. In the words of my favorite runner, Becs Gentry, I work towards progress, not perfection. 

Oh, and I still haven’t eaten horse. 7 months down, 3 to go. Until next month.

-B

The week before my mom came into town, I visited Almaty, Kazakhstan with Raven! We had SUCH an amazing time together visiting museums, churches, and eating good food. We were visiting during Women's Day, so every man had huge bouquets of tulips for the women in his life. Needless to say I think we should adopt this tradition in America, it was so sweet. A highlight of the trip was visiting a Russian LDS branch (bottom right photo), where we attended sacrament meeting and got to visit with some of the members and missionaries. It was truly one of the coolest experiences of my Fulbright so far, and I still keep in touch with the American missionaries there!

We had a wonderful dinner with Aizhamal's family! Aizhamal made us some delicious Beshbarmak, which is the national dish of Kyrgyzstan, as well as some samsa, beets, borsok, potatoes, etc. (the list goes on and on). It was so awesome to share stories and get to know her mom and grandma better. Her grandma kept poking at us to make us laugh in the photos, so this was literally the only photo I could find where we aren't all dying laughing.

Some highlights from our time in Karakol! We spent a lot of time with Natalia (my friend) and her family. The photo on the bottom left is proof that we had to jump the car. The photo on the bottom right is of Natalia's mom, who was a chemistry and biology teacher. Go women in STEM! The lake was so pretty this time of year, but much too cold for swimming. 

Highlights from Cholpon-Ata. This was a really cool town, where we were within walking distance of the beach. The owner of our cottage told us about a Kok-boru game that was happening at the hippodrome, so we ran over and were able to watch the entire game (top middle photo). If you don't know about Kok-boru, it's basically where players on horseback heave the carcass of a dead goat into a giant bucket. It's like polo and soccer combined. VERY fun to watch. Our taxi driver told us the meat of the game goat is highly sought after because the meat is so tender.....from being heaved around and stepped on by the horses. We also went horseback riding and my true horse girl self could not be contained. I was in heaven. 

Photos from our time in Bishkek and Tokmok. I loved getting to show my mom all the places I've been going over the past 7 months. One American woman normally draws attention, but with the two of us it felt like we were Hollywood celebrities. 

In a couple of my English classes, I've done this activity where I have my students write what happiness means to them. I love seeing their responses, which range from their family to loving themselves to coffee time. My happiness is getting accepted into medical school! Doing a lot of my med school process in Kyrgyzstan has been very surreal and crazy at the same time (a couple of midnight interviews), but I wouldn't have had it any other way. Dr. Barnett coming in 2030 :)