TravelTruth

The Mystery Hole:

The Mystery Hole, located in Fayetteville, West Virginia, is not, in fact, as sleazy as it might sound. Probably. You see, no one is allowed to see the inside of the tubular Mystery Hole until they pay for entrance, something that doesn't seem suspicious at all. However, you don't seem to sign an NDA, because people are readily willing to give reports of what is within. According to outside sources, the Mystery Hole features a gravitational well that twists reality unpredictably within the safe confines of a warped metal tube covered in graffiti. Naturally. So, feel free to pour your money into this haunting roadside miracle, because it'll all come back to us eventually! Surrounded by beautiful emerald forests and dazzling lakes, the Mystery Hole certainly isn't lacking in the scenery department! We suppose.            FIN.

Paul Bunyan Land:

This wonderful attraction exists seemingly because someone saw a bunch of giant lumberjack statues across the country and said, "Hey! I know! I'll make a giant lumberjack statue that addresses children by name!" No, you didn't misread that. The giant statue puts people at ease by opening it's cavernous maw and bellowing out the names of your children. Where, exactly, did someone get the idea that such a thing would be relaxing? We couldn't say, but it probably starts with a "Mal-" and ends with a "-phas"12. But don't worry, it isn't just a horrific colossus that's been stalking your family, because there's an entire amusement park built around the thing. Yeah, the "Land" isn't just for show. According to the 26-foot tall abomination's website, paulbunyanland.com, it also includes several summer camp-like joys for you to throw money into, which include a "Ghost Mine" that I can only assume is haunted by the souls of children eaten by Paul Bunyan's Lovecraftian, animatronic harbinger and it's equally massive metal pet bull. Yes, the thing is blue, true to the legend. If you really want to soak up that. . . um, hmm. Well, I can't think of any evil animatronics in popular culture, but if you really want to soak up that experience, you can stay overnight in a nearby log cabin, where you may or may not be stolen in your sleep to appease the forest gods. Praise Paul Bunyan, Devourer of Worlds.            FIN.        

Tombstone:

Located in Arizona, this town if famous for being the spot of a gunfight at O. K. Corral, but it doesn't actually offer much beyond a few stores and a Wild West-era reenactment, which would be good and all, but can be found all over the country. Seeing as it's i the middle of the desert, this just doesn't feel worth it to many visitors, a fact that we are including to make this paragraph stretch on longer . . .  so that it can be about the same size as the others . . .   and not shorter . . . like it would have been . . . otherwise. But wait, you might be thinking, it still has historical significance; you can't replicate that! Well, you would be wrong. You see, the famous gunfight the town is known for? It actually happened in what more or less amounts to a parking lot close by the town. So, no: the town of Tombstone is important in no way other than being famous for being thought of as important. I genuinely don't have anything else to say here.            FIN.        

Because everyone knows that if different sections of a title start with the same character and basic sound, their creators are geniuses with full grasp of language and can be trusted with your money! Such as, say, the good folks of Avarice's Apollyon.