Family Life

Alma is often portrayed through her relationships with men. Sexism and the relative renown of her lovers and father seem to be the reason for this emphasis. However, Alma was a woman who's family was primarily female. She spent her entire childhood with her mother and eventually birthed three daughters. Instead of rehashing Alma's various romantic encounters, this page focuses on Alma's familial relationships and the care and love she exhibited within them.

Alma's Father: Emil

Alma's respect for her father and close relationship with him have been perverted by multiple attempted psychoanalyses of her. For example, her biographer Hilmes wrote, "her hysterical personality disorder is probably traceable to her extremely close attachment to her father" (34). Later, Hilmes asserted that her father used her as a "spousal substitute" for his unfaithful wife (Hilmes 34). In the first place, hysterical personality disorder is often weaponized against women and since Alma was never diagnosed with this disorder during her lifetime, this characterization comes off as sexist. In the second place, close relationships between fathers and daughters should not be sexualized. Her father's loss is also used to psychoanalyze why Alma fell in love with Gustav Mahler, a man 19 years her senior. Blum wrote, "Gustav Mahler (1860-1911) was a father figure with whom she fell in love at first sight" (294). While Alma and Gustav did have a large age gap by modern standards, Alma's own parents were 15 years apart. The relative prevalence of large age gaps in fin-de-siècle marriages indicates that this remark only serves to sexualize Alma's relationship with her father. These two examples, one from a biography, and one from an article tangentially about Alma, show how accounts of Alma's life usually involve the oversexualization or perversion of her relationships.

Alma's own words show her close relationship with her father without sexualizing it. In her autobiography she referred to him as a genius and praised his artistic talents writing, "To get to know Austria’s nature, one only needed to see my father’s paintings… then one would understand" (Mein Leben 13, 15). She would spend hours sitting in his studio watching him paint and listening to him sing in his light tenor (13). He introduced her to Goethe's Faust at an early age telling her and her sister, "This is the best book in the world. Read it, memorize it" (14). This book took on particular importance to Alma to the extent that she wrote in her diary "From this book I take my code of behavior" (Diaries 1898-1902 126). Basing her morals on the book her father introduced to her shows the respect she had for both the book and by extension her father. When he died, she wrote, “I always felt, that I had lost my leader, my guiding star" (Mein Leben 17). In the 13 years they had together, he seemed to be a supportive and involved parent. In the years after his death, she still felt that he was a sympathetic figure, writing "If only I had someone to whom I could speak my mind. I live amongst strangers. If my dear Papa were here, I'm certain he would understand me" (Diaries 1898-1902 75). This sentiment was expressed after an argument with her mother proving that the idea of her beloved father helped Alma deal with familial tensions. In life and in death, Alma relied on her father and clearly had much respect for him.

However, like many parents during the time, Anna was not afraid to use corporal punishment. Alma wrote “This morning: a row with Mama, but I felt totally in the right. She actually struck me. If Mama thinks she can restrain me by resorting to violence, she’s mistaken” (Diaries 1898-1902 94). Here we see that Anna was willing to hit her daughter during an argument. Alma hinted that this was a pattern with her mother by writing “a friend who threatens to slap your face every five minutes, whether others are listening or not – you don’t say much to such a friend, can’t say much, because you’re afraid to” (45). It seems that over the years of corporal punishment, Alma learned not to confide in her mother. The relationship was further strained by Anna's response to Alma's relationship with Gustav Klimt. Her mother often scolded her for spending so much time with him and warned her that people would talk. Additionally Alma remembered her mother saying “He really likes you, don’t deny it, but you’re too good to be merely his plaything” (49). While the general tone within the diaries is a sense of defiance toward her mother in regards to this relationship, we can see that Anna’s attempts at controlling Alma could stem from genuine worry for her daughter. Gustav was much older than Alma and Anna seemed to be worried he was taking advantage of her. There is a possibility that Anna was more worried about the family's reputation than Alma's possible exploitation by Gustav, but this would still mean Anna cares for her family and tries to protect it. While Anna did punish her daughter and attempt to control her, it seemed to stem from love and/or concern for her.

It should be noted, that Anna and Alma were also both musically inclined. Anna was a trained singer and before marrying Emil, she had performed at the Künstlerhaus and Ring-Theater (Hilmes 14). Hilmes noted that in Alma’s autobiography she wrote “As I was the only musician in the house…” and concluded that this was “a sideswipe at her mother’s vocal studies…” (Mein Leben 15, Hilmes 17). This could be a sideswipe, however I am more inclined to view it as a product of the common linguistic distinction between musicians and singers. Alma also noted that her father had a wonderful tenor voice and he had also performed at the Künstlerhaus (Mein Leben 13, Hilmes 14). By Hilmes’ logic, then, Alma would be making a sideswipe at both her mother and her beloved father. Given how established Alma's good will toward her father is, this sideswiping seems unlikely. Overall, Alma seemed to respect and admire her mother's musical talent.

Considering Alma as a daughter and mother counters the oversexualized narrative of her life. The love and respect she described toward her father, mother, and children creates a more nuanced if less dramatic account of her personal life. In this overview, Alma achieves of a level of normalcy. As a daughter she respects but also sometimes fights with her parents. As a mother, she loves her children and grieves their losses. Grounding Alma in her family demonstrates her fundamental humanity.