Positive Consequences

We will celebrate helpful and kind behavior in our class. Ultimately, we want children to be intrinsically motivated to do the right thing.   Intrinsic motivation is the act of doing something without any obvious external rewards. You do something because it's enjoyable and interesting, makes you feel good, is personally challenging, and/or leads to a sense of accomplishment rather than because of an outside incentive or pressure to do it, such as a reward. 

Kids are still developing and having life experiences that provide the basis for intrinsic motivation. I believe the key is finding the right balance. We have a simple program in Room 300 that will encourage and honor good behavior - providing individual recognition and group rewards, while also hopefully growing intrinsic motivation.

Kudos Club: Students will have the opportunity to be recognized for exhibiting the qualities of a good leader. We will be on the lookout for exemplary character traits exhibited in our classroom: fairness, responsibility, kindness, respect, humility, integrity, courage, self control, etc.  Together as a class, students can earn a 20 minute fun activity when they unlock a Kudos Achievement. On the 4th Achievement, we will enjoy a 40 minute celebration, for example playing a class game such as: Hunker Hauser, King Elephant, Four on a Bench or "Toaster, Palm Tree, Viking".

General Problem-Solving 

Together we will brainstorm scenarios that require teacher help and scenarios that students can try to problem-solve independently. Using the phrase, “Big Deal or No Big Deal” helps students discern the seriousness of a problem. Together we'll discuss things that could happen in the school day that are a “Big Deal” and you must tell a teacher immediately (for example: teasing, fighting, someone getting hurt, theft). Then we'll discuss things that can happen in the school day that could be considered “No Big Deal” and how to problem solve the situation (for example: that’s my spot, you stepped on my foot, you have something I want).

After categorizing the events, we discuss possible solutions to the problem. If it is a “Big Deal” the solution is always tell the teacher or an adult. If it is “No Big Deal” the solutions might be to use the feelings script, find another spot/item, wait, or ignore the problem. The goal is to empower students to solve their own problems in constructive ways. This type of exercise helps to build self-awareness, self-management, relationship skills, and responsible decision-making.

Example of a "feelings script":     I feel/am _____ (emotion)  when you  ______ (behavior)  because ______ (reason).   I need _____ (request). 

Logical Consequences

The message I want to send your child is, "I'm FOR you, not against you. I want you to succeed!"

The goal of logical consequences is to help children develop internal understanding, self-control, and a desire to follow the rules. Logical consequences help children look more closely at their behaviors and consider the results of their choices. Unlike punishment, where the intention is to make a child feel shamed, the intention of logical consequences is to help children develop internal controls and to learn from their mistakes in a supportive atmosphere. 

Examples of logical consequences are:

• If a student has difficulty using a piece of equipment or a privilege in an appropriate way, they will lose the privilege temporarily

•  Incomplete class work will need to be finished at home

•  Failure to master basic skills, such as raising a hand to speak or entering the classroom quietly will result in a short “Recess Academy” to practice the skill

• Students who talk or disrupt during instruction will be given a warning and a chance to correct their behavior.  If the disruption continues, the student will take a time out away from the group or use a privacy folder to remind themself to be quiet. 

Peer to Peer Problem Solving

I embrace restorative practices because they have the ability to empower students to learn from unacceptable choices, to understand their impact, and to grow personally in their ability to make more sound decisions and resolve problems. Restorative practices help all students learn to resolve disagreements, take ownership of their behavior, and engage in acts of empathy and forgiveness.

When an unacceptable behavior has happened, it is important that the offended student be able to share how the offense made them feel. In this way, the offender is able to understand how their behavior impacts others and therefore understand the perspective of the other person. Also, there is great restorative power in having the student who has made an unacceptable choice reflect on their behavior in writing by addressing very specific questions like: What choice did I make? How did my choice impact others? Is there a better way that I could have addressed this situation? If I had the opportunity for a redo, would I make the same choice? Why or why not?

Apologies

Offering and Accepting an apology is important because

•  It allows both parties a chance to understand the real issue at hand. This is the cognitive part of the conversation – an acknowledgement of the thing that was done.

• It allows both parties the chance to demonstrate an understanding of the feelings involved. This is the emotional part of the conversation – an acknowledgement of how the thing made the other person feel. It allows the victim the chance to let the feelings/offenses go; a chance to move on because the offender realizes what they did wrong.

• It provides an opportunity for open communication in order to consider past offenses or experiences that might be influencing the current situation. 

• It allows for both parties to move beyond the immediate issue/problem and allows for the repair of the relationship.

• It acknowledges that everyone makes mistakes and that grace and forgiveness is important. We appreciate it when someone else admits fault and seeks forgiveness. Everyone should be humble enough to do the same.

In class, we will spend time learning and practicing how to give (and not give) an apology, as well as how to accept an apology.

We will learn to use statements like:

• It was my fault that _______ happened. I apologize for letting it happen.

• I realize that _____ was my fault and I am sorry for making you feel ________.

• I am truly sorry that I did this. I want to make things better. Tell me how I can do that.

• I know that ______ made you feel ________. I am sorry. Will you please forgive me?

• I accept your apology. Make sure this does not happen again.

• Because you know that ______ hurt me, I can accept your apology.

• I now understand why/what happened. I can forgive you.

• I forgive you for _______.