Category: Romance/angst
Rating: PG
Spoilers: Season Four, The Light, Prodigy
Continuing the story of Daniel and Antonia from It never Rains...it Pours... and Seeing the Light
Notes: This instalment has taken a long time to write over a year, a year in which there has been a lot of stuff happening in fandom and in my personal life which is probably why I couldn't finish it. The title was inspired by the Reo Speedwagon and Air Supply song, Can't fight this feeling.
Dedicated to my dear friend Mac, though he would consider it "an intolerable deal of saccharine."
"One does nothing who tries to console a despondent person with word. A friend is one who aids with deeds at a critical time when deeds are called for." Titus Maccius Plautus BC 254-184, Roman Comic Poet.
Jack O'Neill ran his fingers through his hair; he was bored, after only a week stuck on P4X-347. Due to the narcotic effects of the Goa'uld light in the palace on this planet they had a forced stay of three weeks while the effect wore off. The Colonel understood the reasons, had seen the terrible effects the withdrawal had had on Daniel and the members of SG5 but that didn't ease his current tedium.
Daniel and his fellow Archaeologist Antonia were as happy as fleas on a dog deciphering all the Goa'uld symbols, hell he reckoned, the two of them would be happy to stay here three months. Sam was writing her book, he couldn't even remember the title, lots of many syllabled words. Loren was sleeping, he'd checked on the lad awhile back.
The boredom had been bought on by the lack of something to do; he wasn't used to siting doing nothing. Well no he corrected himself, he could sit for hours fishing, Teal'c seemed to regard that as doing nothing. But he couldn't fish here, couldn't leave the palace for more than a couple of hours at a time. He didn't ask, but he suspected by the frantic way that Antonia had rushed pass him the day before she had been out outside for too long and the agitated state was the effects of withdrawal.
Jack put his baseball cap back on his head and considered his fellow inmates.
Daniel had given him a scare, the two of them hadn't discussed what happened that morning and Jack gathered that his friend remembered very little of events after he left Antonia at the restaurant. Somehow he had found his way home and maybe slept, he did recall the blackness but had been as surprised as Jack to find himself on the wrong side of the balcony railing, about to jump. For one, literally heart stopping moment Jack thought he had finally lost his friend, but the swift return to the planet had revived Daniel and he had made a full recovery.
Barber hadn't been so lucky, no one saw the signs and he ended his life in the violent vortex generated by the establishing wormhole. He shivered slightly at the memory but it had been that death that fired up the adrenaline needed to carry the dying Daniel through the gate. Jack sighed; they were safe now…until the next time.
Oh then there was the fair Doctor Richards, very attractive and he could tell Daniel thought so, the teasing comment he had tried the other week had produced a beetroot red flush of denial. Yet nothing was stopping Daniel following through on those thoughts, unlike…. No he stopped himself best not to go there. That thought was locked deep down, no he wasn't gonna admit that to anyone. Yeah so what about what you told the Tok'ra babe eh Jack?
"I care about her... a lot more than I'm supposed to."
Of course the last time he was trapped on a planet he didn't have SG1 for company he was the only member of the team that was caught in the devastating firerain. Laira was a lovely woman, funny and independent and he cared a lot for her. Jack O'Neill was very happy to settle down with her on Edora, but he was Colonel O'Neill of SG1 his life was not a simple farmer's one on a distant planet. He cared for her and maybe they would have had a child if he'd stayed.
Jack closed his mind to any further thoughts of Sam and thought about Loren, the young man had an enquiring mind and was absorbing as much information about the Tau'ri homeworld as he could; the world he would soon call his own. Sam had tried to find out his original home world, but the boy did not know the glyphs and the information from his scattered memories was not enough to reveal the location, maybe one day a SG team would discover it. Until then like Cassie and Nyan, he would be given a false background.
His thoughts and his boredom were interrupted by Antonia, "Hey Jack" she greeted him.
"Hey Toni," he replied.
She stayed in the doorway a little hesitant to enter the main part of the room; "I came to apologise."
He gave her a questioning look, his head tilted to one side, a finger tracing the scar that cut across his eyebrow.
She took that as a cue to continue, " About yesterday, I'm sorry I knew I shouldn't have stayed outside so long."
So his suspicions were correct, "No you shouldn't" his tone was soft but his voice carried the authority of command.
Antonia blushed.
"However, "Jack continued smiling, " I think you're learned your lesson." There was no point being too harsh with her, she'd realised her mistake and there hadn't really been a need to confess.
"Yeah I have," she returned the smile.
"I'm surprised you managed to drag yourself away from those inscriptions anyway."
"Well you know what they say about all work…"
"Now that's an attitude I think I like, maybe I should get you to talk to Carter."
Antonia chuckled, "Would it help?"
"Probably not!" he grinned back at her.
A portable chessboard lay on top of one of the packaging chess, Antonia gestured toward it, "Fancy a game?"
Jack nodded, picked up the box, unfastened the clasp and began to lay out the pieces. At least the boredom would be alleviated tonight.
***********
Jack, Daniel, Sam, Antonia and Loren stood expectantly as the Stargate dialled up, once the wormhole had been established General Hammond's voice came over loud and clear via the MALP.
"Good morning people, " he began, " I'm pleased to announce that the latest blood samples Dr Fraiser analysed have pronounced you fit to return to earth."
"Oh yes!" exclaimed Jack loudly punching the air, then remembering he was addressing a superior officer, In a more restrained tone he said, " Thank you sir."
Most of the equipment they had used in the last three weeks was packed and already loaded on to the FRED, although they still had a few things to clear up, they were ready to depart in an hour.
Loran looked around the palace he had called home for many years; Daniel sensed his unease and gently patted him on the back. " It'll be ok, you'll be fine on Earth, lots of young people your own age."
The young man smiled weakly, then brightened, " I will see Teal'c again."
" You will indeed." Daniel confirmed.
Antonia smiled too watching the exchange, she was looking forward to getting back to earth, back to the comforts of the 21st Century and to whatever lay ahead for her and Daniel.
As if he had sensed her watching him Daniel turned towards his fellow archaeologist and smiled warmly.
The smile was easily returned, outwardly conveying the happiness it had provoked. The clear blue eyes meeting hers seemed to hold a promise, one she was hoping would be fulfilled soon.
The subject had not been mentioned since that night two weeks ago when they had talked about their feelings. Seeing Daniel close to death had terrified her, scaring her with the realisation that she didn't ever want to lose him. Both were wary though, what effect was the narcotic of this place having on them? Well now they were going home and could make a free decision.
The freedom had to wait a little longer, Doctor Fraiser insisted they stay under her observation in infirmary for 24 hours and then a further 48 restricted to base.
However it was a start, Antonia could check her email and her post, she had been warned to have her bills paid automatically as she could be away on missions, but she never expected to be trapped for three weeks off world.
***********
The pile of work on Antonia's desk didn't seen to be any smaller, she put her pen down and put her hands behind her head and stretched out. Closing her eyes briefly for a second as she arched her back over the chair.
The voice from the doorway made her start upright.
" Doctor Richards?"
"Yes" she blushed aware that she had been caught in a less than flattering position.
"Ivan Hamilton" announced the man, sitting uninvited in the chair opposite Antonia and dropping a pile of SGC folders on to her desk. "You have been assigned to my team," he announced without pre-amble.
"M4C-862 is a moon orbiting a gas giant and the SGC is considering it as a location for a permanent off world research base." He allowed time for Antonia to nod and acknowledge him before he continued, " you and the other team members, are to perform a feasibility study, lasting a minimum of six weeks."
"Six weeks?" she echoed
"Yeah I hope you don't have a problem what that Doctor Richards I'm stretched with staff as is it, I need all the bodies I can get."
"When?"
"We depart 0700 tomorrow, with SG2."
"Tomorrow?" she echoed
"Yes I know it's a bit short notice for you, but I didn't anticipate you being stuck off world all this time."
She smiled, "Neither did I."
Ivan stood up pointing at the reports, "everything is there, " he told her, "I'll see you in the morning."
Before she could reply, he was gone.
Antonia picked up the top report, and started to flick through the MALP pictures, Six weeks, she sighed. The assignment looked interesting, but she didn't like the idea of all that time away from Daniel.
***********
Antonia was relieved to return to her apartment, it was reassuring to see all her familiar belongings, though she still had many boxes to unpack. Now they would have to wait until after the mission, away even longer this time and no Daniel for company. She sighed audibly as she headed for the kitchen to make a coffee. Though as least she'd be busy, it seemed that there would plenty of work to do, plus she still had plenty of material from P4X-347 stored on her digital camera.
The chime of the doorbell interrupted the coffee making. She smiled broadly at her visitor, Daniel.
"Hey, " he greeted her.
"Hi this is a surprise," she gestured for him to come in. It was raining outside and Daniel's shoulders were lightly covered with glistening drops.
"I heard you were off on a mission again tomorrow and I…." He stopped aware that entering the warm apartment had caused his glasses to mist over, he removed them and with practised ease polished them with a clean tissue.
The clear blue eyes met hers and unhindered by the reflection of the lenses Antonia found herself magnetically drawn to him, mesmerised by the colour and by the look he was giving her. She flushed red, her face hot, both from the scrutiny and from the thoughts she was having.
What would be worse? She questioned herself, to make love to this man right now and then long for him for six weeks, or to wait another six weeks before she gave into the impulse she felt now. To hide her confusion she moved toward one of the boxes that still needed to be unpacked. She had moved into the apartment only days before the mission to P4X-347 and many of her books were still in the packing cases.
"That book I promised to lend you is here somewhere, " she told him, her head buried in a box. She hoped that the search would be long enough for the flush to fade from her cheeks but the book was easily in reach at the top of the box. She picked it up and turned back to Daniel. He had moved closer and she misjudged his closeness colliding with him, the book was sent flying. They both crouched down reaching for it, but hands met hands, eyes met eyes and then Daniel's lips were on hers.
Crouching down to retrieve the book Antonia had been balancing on the balls of her feet, the added pressure of Daniel pressing on made her lose that balance and she found herself falling to the floor, Daniel on top of her and they were still kissing. Kissing the way she'd wanted him to kiss her for months, kissing her in a way that would soon lead to more if she didn't protest. Yes she had to protest, had to stop him now, but the intensity of the kiss and the feel of his body on top of hers was so right.
So intent on the sensations of the kiss, of the thrill of two lips and mouths exploring each other, Antonia was momentarily unaware of Daniel's hands, until she felt his still cool from the outside hands touch her bare skin, He had slipped a hand under her T-shirt; his fingers lightly brushing her back and then moving to the front, a thumb brushed against the lace of her bra. The touch was feather light but send a jolt of electricity through her and gave her the final impetus to stop him. She broke the kiss, Daniel took that as sign to move his attention to the nape of her neck, planting several soft kisses that nearly made her change her resolve.
"No," she breathed with a croak, then louder aware her voice was barely audible, "no Daniel please don't."
He looked up his puzzled eyes meeting hers, those wonderful blue eyes, the pupils dilated by desire, then he blushed, a red flush colouring his cheeks. He rolled away from her and stood up, offering a hand to Antonia so she could stand too.
"I'm sorry." He told her once they were back on their feet and he was apologetic he'd jumped on her like a teenager high on hormones.
"It's OK," Antonia touched his cheek gently, feeling the warmth of his flushed skin.
"You must think I'm an immature jerk!"
She smiled, "No never," she reassured him and confirmed it by gently kissing him. "It's too soon Danny, or maybe it's not, " She shook her head. "All I know I'm away for six weeks and I'm gonna miss you and if we…" she left the sentence unfinished but they both filled in the blanks.
"I understand, " Daniel told her, " And I'll miss you too."
"I was just about to make a coffee before you arrived would you like one?"
"Great, yes please."
Antonia headed off to the kitchen and returned with two steaming mugs, they sat on the couch and after a awkward pause where neither was sure what to say, Daniel reached over for the book that Antonia had offered to lend him. It was a study of the Nazca region of Peru, where she had been just before joining the SGC. He asked her a question and her reply sparked off the conversation, and they were talking and debating the way they had for the last few weeks on the planet.
After an hour, Daniel stood up, "I better go, I expect you have an early start in the morning"
"Oh yeah," Antonia grimaced, "you know the airforce!"
At the door Daniel kissed her, a long slow kiss, Antonia felt as if time was standing still, so different from the hurried passion earlier. She wondered if her earlier decision had been the right one, she wanted Daniel to stay, wanted him to make love to her. However, he respected that earlier choice and broke away from her.
"Take care, I'll see you in a few weeks." He said.
"You too, good night Danny." She replied and he left.
***********
The mission to M4C-862 ended badly, shortly after Jack and Teal'c came to take over the "baby sitting" of the scientists an unexplained series of attacks by some sort of energy based creature began. Bill Thompson was killed. After a heroic run to the Stargate by Jack, they managed to escape but all the weeks of research had to be abandoned.
Back in Cheyenne Mountain, Antonia sat patiently on a bed as the nurse checked her over. She'd not had any contact with whatever had killed Bill, but Doctor Frasier had insisted that SG1 and all the civilians were checked out.
When Daniel entered the infirmary, he saw Jack first and started toward him but then he spotted Antonia, he was next to her in seconds
"You OK?" He asked, his eyes full of concern, his hands on her upper arms.
She nodded.
"I heard Bill was killed."
"Yes," she looked down away from his gaze, another death, it still hadn't registered that someone she had worked with for weeks and had began to be-friend was gone.
Daniel pulled her into a tight hug, to comfort her but also to reassure himself that she was OK, that she was back safely.
Then ignoring the rest of the bustling room he kissed her, oblivious to everyone else. He didn't care what the others thought all he wanted was to show Antonia how much he'd missed her.
A discreet cough interrupted them. Janet Fraiser was waiting at the foot of the bed holding Antonia's chart. "Excuse me Doctor Jackson, but I would like to check my patient."
Daniel stepped back but didn't move very far, he waited at the head of the bed, giving enough room for Janet to be able stand in front of Antonia.
"Well Toni, according to your chart, everything checks out. How do you feel?" Janet asked.
"Good." Antonia replied.
Janet stared at her for second, as if she didn't quite believe her.
"Janet really, I'm fine" she insisted, then added, " Bill's death was a shock and I am a little tired."
The doctor consulted the chart one more time, "OK, there's nothing here to worry about, go home and get some rest."
"Thank you."
Antonia hopped off the bed and slipped her hand into Daniel's, "Can you leave now?" She asked him.
He smiled at her, "Just let them try and stop me!"
They stopped by Jack's bed on the way out.
" You OK?" Daniel asked.
"Yeah, sure, even if I didn't get mouth to mouth resuscitation like you did!"
Daniel laughed, "And that was just a preliminarily treatment, I think the patient needs many more doses."
"I agree," Jack replied his eyes twinkling with merriment.
***********
Antonia unlocked the door of her apartment, the place still didn't feel like home, she never seemed to be there, the unpacked boxes and empty shelves confirmed that.
"Maybe I can finally unpack now, " she commented.
Daniel placed a hand on the small of her back, "I don't think you should bother."
"What?"
His answer was a kiss, pulling her close to his body, she fought a little at first, slight irritation at her unanswered query but it didn't last long. She let herself enjoy the kiss, she had missed Daniel so much while she had been away, longed for his touch, now she was going to make the most of it.
She got her explanation after the kiss, "You shouldn't unpack, because I want you to come and live with me."
"Oh!"
"I love you Toni and we've wasted too much time already." He cupped her face with his hand his thumb gently stroking her cheek, "I never know what going to be threatening us next, we should take every chance we can to be happy and be together."
"I love you," she smiled warmly, hiding how much that scared her, the fear she felt that one day she could lose him, like the friends she had already lost, but he was right they had to take that chance; She couldn't fight the feeling any longer. "And yes I will move in with you, but can we wait a few days?"
"Yes, sure." He frowned as she left his arms and walked away, but the smile soon returned.
Antonia had opened the bedroom door; "I have much more interesting things I want us to do first."
© Katana 2002