Food

Chicken Adabo

Ingredients

• • A chicken

  • Soy sauce

  • Vinegar

  • Garlic

  • Whole peppercorns

  • Bay leaves

  • Basmati rice

Method

• • Go into the yard, kill a chicken.

  • Pluck-pluck, chop-chop.

  • Cook-cook-cook.

  • Eat with fingers.

  • Yummy!

Tasty Pig

Due-diligence compliance: a full risk-assessment must be completed before attempting to eat this meal.

Ingredients

• • Bacon

  • Eggs

  • Sausage

  • Tomato

  • Liver

  • Kidney

  • Onions

  • Potato

  • Lard

Method

• • Configure your NetBIOS, TCP/IP, DNS, FTP, DHCP, PPTP, PPPoE, TCP/IP, UDP/IP, ICMP/IP, Static IP routing, client ID, SSL, FTP proxy server and [of course] I/O ports.

  • Log on.

  • Order the ingredients.

  • Proceed to checkout, and wait for delivery.

  • Fry it all up. That'll do nicely.