Gas Attack Products

It’s a well know fact that us motorhomers stand a really good chance of being gassed and robbed especially if we decide to leave the safety of our shores and head off to some dodgy third world country where Johnny Foreigner is waiting to relive us of our money and possessions.   Everyone knows that countries like France and Germany are full of villains that know there is a regular precession of witless British Motorhomers arriving on their shores every day.

These people are clever and their latest weapon utilised in their quest to rob you is the Gas attack!  You will park up on an Aire de Camping car in some sleepy backwater village of France that looks all innocent like and in the early hours Freddy the Frog will sneak up, empty an industrial size tanker of Gas into your van (probably through the fridge vent or through the cab heater intake which you foolishly forgot to close) and in a few hours (he is very patient) when you are dead to the world (or probably dead full stop) he will break in and rob you at his leisure!

In the morning should you be lucky enough to wake up all your valuables and cash will be gone!  The only help you will get from your French neighbours (who are probably in on it, you know they can’t be trusted) is a Gallic shrug and maybe half a stale croissant.

Never fear!  The almost certainty of being gassed and robbed can easily be avoided!  Motorhome Fruitcakes are proud to announce their range of anti gas attack accessories that may well save your cash, property and probably your life

The Fruitcakes Gas Detector

Our low noise, low emissions, ultra sensitive gas detector detects all kinds of narcotic gas should you become the victim of a Gas attack.  Just fire up the ultra quiet* 2 stroke engine before you go to bed and in the event of an attack the alarm bells will ring, thus allowing you to thwart the attack.

£499.99

The Fruitcakes Gas mask

Go to bed assured of a peaceful night’s sleep with this ultra comfy gas mask.  Thoroughly tested in our fruitcakes lab ** it is guaranteed to be 100% leak proof *** and won’t let you down!

£99.99

The Fruitcakes Pet Gas Mask

Don’t forget your beloved motorhome pet!  Pet masks come in various sizes from Hamster to Elephant (POA) and start from just £59.99 (Hamster).

* 60 decibels.  About the same as an ice cream van machine.

**  Big Bazza’s shed

*** May not work with funny shaped heads