Germany

(Note: A bit of history, the German Training in Power community had grown to 80-100 members around 1998 and many of us taught students there and developed many friendships. The German group became an official TIP organization, creating a Board of Directors. Christiane often visited the US for joint Board meetings, retreats and class work, and the German community was a valued part of Training in Power. Christiane tried for many years, as I did, to identify and address the abuse, and when that didn't happen, she began to enlist the German board members to address these issues with her. The result was that they not only got nowhere, but were abused for their attempts at resolution. Thus these powerful letters: Christiane resigns, followed by a letter in which the whole German community left Training in Power, followed by two open letters to Faye, as Christiane speaks out.

Christiane’s Resignation (from her positions as a student and the executive director in Germany)

To: Training in Power

I signed the letter “community resignation Germany”. This will be a personal addition from me as the lead of the German community.

I am resigning in clarity, in deep self love, self respect and an loving honor of my dignity.

I am the one who brought this work TIP 9 years ago to Germany, after Faye gave her ok and a teacher was willing to travel and to teach in Europe.

With all my heart I believed that Faye’s system will help me and lots of others to heal on all levels. And to learn about universal wisdom from a teacher, who calls herself the rememberer. The one who tells the students that she came to teach knowledge from level IV on, which was never taught before on this planet. It excited me to be one of those who has access to this knowledge and the involved power, which gets power transferred by the teacher, as the students are told. I got so hooked, that I wanted to go through all the levels in order to learn everything possible. So much did I trust, believed in, honored and loved my spiritual teacher.

10 years after I started with level I, being now in level X, I am standing joyfully in front of a big pile of shattered pieces.

I am free again. Free from a system which changed my world and human picture in an tremendous way. I lost myself more and more because I strictly followed the teachings. I believed my teacher more than myself. I gave my power away. I also allowed to be guided and lead further and further out of the reality.

The group consciousness I experienced dictates to perceive me now after this resignation as a “fallen” one, one of those who didn’t make it. One of those, who is taken out. I might be also accused, that I took people out.

The older levels might perceive me as a possible danger to their system and to any active student I will have contact to. It might be, that I am badly and disrespectful spoken about behind my back. If these responses happen, you will be able to recognize the intensity of this brainwashing mind control within TIP. This is exactly what happened to so many students, who already resigned with serious concerns for years. I experienced these responses often. I know how people were spoken about, when they left. And all the older levels also experienced this for years and years and they participate actively again and again, instead of standing up for a ruthless examination of any concern.

In any healthy and correct community set up the representatives are very open and receptive to any concern and they will take any concern in serious independent consideration and a following action, regardless of who is in question.

Even after an endless repetition of the same kind of concerns from so many people regarding Faye as a teacher and the founder within the last 10 years I witnessed that the representatives are at the side of the teacher / founder to demonstrate their unmovable so called "loyalty", which will be so much honored by Faye, or just taken for granted by her. Don’t even dare not to be "loyal" !!!

This seems to be more important as to be welcoming, supportive and inviting for any member being in serious trouble, doubt or deep hurt because of harmful treatments by Faye.

These are my experiences: the ones who got hit are merciless left alone. As the longer arm of Faye, the leading and older ones will participate to block any criticism towards Faye and will call it attack. It is said the student has a problem and needs to do personal healing. Period. The teacher / founder is fine no matter how disrespectful, humiliating and degrading she is continuously treating people for more than 10 years. There is no older level who hasn’t experienced such a situation. And there is no older level who stood up right away in this situation to stop Faye in order to protect the student from serious harm. But all the older levels will be at Faye’s side as soon as a student questions her, which only maintains from my view of things an incorrect guru status, which makes her special by being more important to be protected than a student.

I experienced if people dare to share their not satisfying experiences with the teacher / founder they are right away perceived and judged as persons, who undermine and attack Faye, badmouthing her, using a soldier gathering and starting “maneuver” waves against Faye. I perceive this as an extreme control system with no place to be correct by sharing the truth.

Does this sound like a healthy and correct community to you?

I am one of those who dared from the beginning on to speak up to Faye and other representatives of the organizations, if I had a concern, disagreement or doubt. There was always this healthy part in myself which alert me in lots of areas regarding the set ups and the style of leadership within TIP.

I tried very hard for years to get an awareness of dynamics and set ups I experienced as incorrect. I always was open with my critical statements in phone conversations or emails. I offered constant integrity and loyalty (!) by bringing this openly forward in the hope that corrections will happen.

I had to experience for years that the founder’s / teacher’s response to this openness, loyalty and honesty was to be merciless yelled and screamed at, being made wrong, small, sick, needy, being accused of draining the whole leadership, being abusive, being called an attacker – a trouble maker, being accused of so many terrible things, being badly spoken about behind my back and to be also publicly pointed at, shamed, blamed and torn apart, which felt like a modern way of crucifixion to me and which caused severe trauma. I experience all these responses as a deep humiliation, degradation and severe violation of my dignity.

I also had to experience that whenever I wanted to clarify these situations, each feed back to the teacher and founder was immediately deflected, blocked and turned around. From her perception it is always me --- only me. She is fine and healthy and just responding to the pathology I am carrying. I shouldn’t take it personal. Even two mediations were so dominated by Faye that even then, it was all about me.

All of this caused deep self doubt, sometimes self hate. I almost broke emotionally by these as very brutal, harsh, abusive and destroying perceived treatments. Twice I got because of this seriously suicidal. I needed the help of a therapist to recover from the intense trauma my teacher Faye caused.

If you can not believe what I am sharing, you need to know that I have witnesses for everything I am sharing. And I am not the only one who got treated in this way. There are lots of serious traumatized students, who had to go through this as well. The NA Boards receive for years letters of resignation, in which these concerns and experiences are named.

I recovered enough now to be completely detached. I regained deep self love, self respect and self esteem which was seriously shattered for years.

The Training wants to expose the truth about any kind of abuse.. So - what is the truth about Faye’s intense rage, which is never accountable and so often reported to be so harmful? Is there a serious mental / emotional and / or drug head problem? Are you willing to examine the truth of this ongoing abuse?

This rage, which controls, harms and paralyses everybody and which is ignored as a serious sign of unhealthiness for almost two decades by the leadership, who for my opinion at least would need to stand up in order to represent and to protect the membership and innocent students.

This doesn’t happen, because all are Faye’s students. It is my assessment, that all are caught in this brainwashed mind control, which dictates, how to be – especially around Faye. Therefore I don’t blame the leadership and the older ones, because I know they will only be able to respond and to act in an appropriate and correct way in and after situations, which are governed by Faye’s rage, if they step out of the wraps, which hold them prisoners and minimizes or hinders any independent response. Only then it will be possible to experience and to witness such situations “through another lens” -- the lens of personal freedom, true integrity and natural correctness.

I went through this. I know exactly what I am speaking about, when I name the brainwashed mind control. And I know now, how extremely freeing it is, to let go of all these wraps and to connect and to feel the true being again. I can function as an individual again in my life. Now I am able to feel my feelings of freedom, inner peace and joy, independency and deep love and compassion for me and others, which I had lost for such a long time.

I personally think, that the beginning of the mind controlling wraps start with the level III teachings.

From level III on we are taught about the involved danger of this experimental work. Even a physical death if we don’t follow all the taught techniques in order to protect ourselves. This is the beginning for me, where students have to follow strictly the teachings, because now a fear factor is involved. A possible death. And the Teacher says clearly in each level III she is teaching, that there have been deaths in the student body. That she doesn’t want one more death because of the involved dangers of her experimental work. We learn in level III then, that we got the power and the techniques to take care of ourselves and that we will be fine if we really use them. Only so we will be safe.

I estimate this as the beginning of the strong dependency to the teacher. As an innocent student I take level III, not knowing what will come, and suddenly I am in the midst of teachings with inherent dangers and the need to learn and to use the necessary techniques, which will help me to survive these teachings.

What a crazy making twist the students are now mostly unconsciously caught in from here on. And so it goes on with each next level. In all the teaching contents from level III on, there is always an involved severe danger and the need to use the techniques in order to stay well or even alive.

Today, when I look at this, it is very hard for me to understand, why I kept going.

It will be my personal work to clarify in detail for myself, how I could be hooked and mislead in such a depth of my being. I want to heal this part in myself, which can be seduced to follow such teachings and such a teacher, for once and for all. No more ever.

It is Faye’s own responsibility on all levels, how she is treating her students and her clients as a teacher and a healer.

There are definitely professional legal policies and also a strict ethical code for these professions at least in Germany. I don’t know your laws and set ups in NA, but I assume there will be something similar in place for these professions, in order to protect the students and clients. There is a reality of legal rights, how a student and a client needs to be treated by a teacher, councilor, coach or a healer. I guess a respectful treatment is worldwide the minimum obligation for a teacher / healer in any contact with a student or client, regardless of how sick and pathological this person is.

I have been co-dependent to Faye for a long time. Even though I dared and dare to address her I backed her completely. I never spoke about my experiences with my teacher and founder with the German community. No matter what was going on, I kept it for myself. I only spoke in deep honor, appreciation and gratitude about Faye, while I represented her and her work.

Therefore it was almost a shock for the German community to hear from the German relation committee member, how he got treated and what he experienced with Faye. The students organized a meeting and they expressed clearly, that this is not acceptable. They claimed on their right to know and they claimed on their right to be treated as adults, who deserve to be fully informed in order to use their free will for any kind of personal decisions. Just being a younger level does not give any body the right to treat them as children, as the older levels, the official representatives or the authority do by deciding, how much info they get. There is definitely a high danger of manipulative secrecy.

I understand now that I made a big mistake in my leadership position in all these years. In my good intent to be in integrity and “loyalty” to Faye, my teacher, I made our students here small by not sharing my personal experiences, believing it would interfere with their personal spiritual journey, as we are taught. I didn’t want to have this on my “karmic account” with all the immense effects for myself, as I learned from Faye.

I do have on my karmic account, that I let the community believe everything is fine with our teacher / founder, even knowing better for a long time. I participated to mislead them by being quiet about all my serious concerns and experiences because of my strong co-dependency to my teacher. Therefore I treated the younger levels in an not appropriate and disrespectful way as adults, who are certainly very capable to make up their mind by themselves if they listen to experiences from others.

I take full responsibility on all levels for any effect this has had for our students here in Germany.

I only can apologize to them for holding them away from the reality and the truth. And I hope I will find the deep place of self forgiveness.

I will need time to unravel all the layers of wraps I got as a student in TIP. I will also need time to heal the deep pain, the feelings of sincere betrayal and the experience of severe abuse.

I hope the time will come soon, in which the older levels are finally waking up and allowing to look at all these concerns from an independent perspective. It will help to protect the new innocent students, who are coming to this community.

I definitely will be active exposing my experiences within TIP. I want to give innocent persons a chance to listen and to know about concrete experiences within the spiritual community: Training in Power, a spiritual journey in service.

There is so much more to share that it is very possible, that I will offer additional writings in the future.

In deep love and respect to myself,

Christiane

Community Resignation Germany

The German community resigns from TIP / Essence of Life.

To: Training in Power

We are standing up for the freedom to be who we are as individuals and also for the freedom of different opinions and viewpoints.

Being asked, if not even forced, to match the Founders expectations and demands of how to be would have often meant to act against our best knowing and our good conscience in the interest of ourselves as well as our members and organization.

We are not going to follow this. We would sell our souls. We would give our power away. We would lose ourselves.

One reason why we had chosen this work was to heal incorrect and damaging dynamics of our childhood. Our experience is that Faye’s style of leadership provokes serious repetitions of childhood dynamics. They get activated by a deep fear for the students to be treated with her not accountable rage and anger, to be shamed and blamed, to be publicly pointed at, being badly spoken about behind the back, being made small and wrong. This provokes often the conscious or unconscious willingness to follow her expectations how to be, in order to be liked, loved and accepted like a child and in order to avoid any rage, anger and punishment.

This shows us the immensity of Faye’s control techniques, which work very well, because most of us are so traumatized that there is a lack of strength and independency to speak up to Faye. We experience how the ones are treated, who dare to stand up. The ones who speak up are often mistaken as trouble makers, falling and attacking ones. The intense pain, banishment and heartbreaking experiences for the ones who dare to speak up is a horror which no spiritual community can agree with.

Re-traumatizing constantly old wounds does not help in any way to heal.

We do not want to be treated in this way.

We do not deserve to be treated in this way.

For us these are very incorrect, abusive, unhealthy, misleading and crazy making dynamics, which are still tolerated, even backed and continuously excused by the representatives and leaders of the organizations.

We do not see that Faye’s leading style incorporates the ability to treat others as an equal with respect, honour and appreciation, with balanced contact and equivalent communication.

We are devastated about the violations of the individual’s dignity as well by yelling and screaming at our representatives as blaming, shaming, accusing them, making them wrong, pointing at them and by disconnecting the phone connections several times.

We are told that Faye is teaching now a course in “anger management.” We hardly can believe it. We wish Faye would show by example the development of a constructive and acceptable anger and conflict management style instead of teaching about it in theory.

We are missing from Faye a healthy self critical assessment of her own behaviour. We are also missing the readiness to offer words of regret or apologies. We are missing the willingness and the ability to listen and to respect critical feed backs. And we miss the ability to resolve conflicts and the involved negativity as fast as possible and to stay in contact regardless of what is going on. We also miss a love tone which is coming from the heart.

Faye’s total withdrawing now from any interpersonal contact to our executive director, to the Board and to the community for several months is perceived by us as a highly passive aggressive, degrading and very disrespectful treatment towards all of us. The withdrawing is also perceived as very irresponsible for a teacher whose work is experimental with involved dangers. We miss the ability to differentiate personal conflicts from necessary professional interactions in the interest of the students well being.

We estimate Faye’s withdrawing from any contact to us as a hidden agenda to finish the project in Germany.

It is a shattering and very harmful experience for us to be treated in this way by our spiritual teacher.

We are very concerned that lots of unresolved personal dynamics, energetic and other hidden agendas of the founder could be as well woven in all her energetic set ups as in her teachings.

We recognize more and more, how many elements of the Training are used to create fear, dependency and massive control. We are observing in deep concern the effects of a manipulative brain washing group consciousness, which is existent and followed by the active students.

The wraps of the group consciousness are very strong, subtle and multifarious. We started now to unravel them and we are shocked to realize how much we got mislead and programmed to be, to think, to respond and to act in certain ways. We definitely prefer to be independent individuals, even so-called "trouble makers" than to be programmed to uniformed good functioning "robots". 

We are also very concerned that the high amount of dope affects Faye much more as the Boards and the ministers took into consideration yet. It is not a concern or issue who smokes dope or who does not, but if you will do some scientific researches about the typical personality disorders and about the mental and emotional damage this high amount for such a long time causes, you will understand much more, what our concerns are about. Please take the time and do these researches. We scrutinize whether the teaching contents

(from level III on) are governed by these dope- effects. We also consider the possibility that these dope effects add to Faye’s inability to be receptive to feed backs about any contents of the teachings that are creating dependency and fear, as well as to feed backs of her own behaviour.

We lost the trust that this system is created and governed by correctness and cleanness by its Founder.

There are so many visible contradictions to her teachings in so many areas, that it gets harder and harder to comprehend that the behaviour, the actions and the teachings are related to one and the same person - our spiritual teacher.

These obvious contradictions can no longer be ignored, not addressed or constantly excused by the representatives of the organizations in order to protect or to back the Founder - no matter what.

We know that lots of people wrote in the past already in detail about lots of serious concerns regarding the founder and leadership.

We do not trust any longer that these serious concerns from so many persons in so many years are seriously taken into consideration by the founder and the Boards. Looking at the history of TIP we experience that all the info in the individual letters and writings in the last years were continuously dismissed as soon as they express concerns regarding the teacher and the founder. This phenomenon is a typical sign and distinguishing mark of a sect or a cult.

We are therefore seriously concerned that such feedback will continue to be only perceived as attack, as "Faye bashing", as statements from "fallen ones", from the ones, who did not make it, from ex- lovers, from ones who were taken out etc. by the official representatives of the organizations.

This is a concrete example how the wraps of the group consciousness are set up and followed. We are afraid that our writing will be perceived in the same way by you. If you do so, it will be totally dismissed.

This letter is written, because we care. We care about Faye, we care about all of you, and we care about any new innocent student. Therefore we – as so many others before us - offer our honesty and our openness by sharing our serious concerns intending and hoping that shifts, corrections and healing will happen.

Our gift to you was and is our unmovable willingness to speak up and not to allow that a fear of sanctions rules and dominates us. This gift is not received and embraced yet. We hope that the founder, the official representatives, the leaders and the ministers can soon understand the depth of this gift.

We can and will no longer accept Faye as our spiritual Teacher.

We want to thank all the ones who supported us during these 9 years. We want to thank the ones who were curious about differences and asked questions in order to understand us and our thoughts, standards, belief systems and emotional effects. We want to thank the ones who were willing to allow us to be who we are. We want to thank the ones who treated us with respect.

With this writing we are resigning from TIP / Essence of Life. The membership decided to liquidate legally the organization - Essenz des Lebens / Essence of life - and we will do so.

Therefore we will no longer be involved in any official correspondence and any network of TIP.

We are announcing this officially in clarity and with very sad hearts.

We wish Faye and all of you all the best!

Peace, love and healing be with you!

OPEN LETTER TO FAYE FITZGERALD

Hi Faye, this is Christiane, Germany

This is the 1st open letter to you from me

I haven’t heard from you after I represented the German community resignation and my personal one as an addition at the 21st of May at the joint Board retreat. Not that I am surprised. I never got called by you in these 9 years in which I replaced and represented you and your work here absolutely alone in Germany. No matter what was going on, nothing could ever motivate you to call me as the one here who took care in service = full time job of everybody and everything. As you know, your work is very demanding and challenging for any student. Obviously nobody and nothing was ever important enough for you to use the phone and to express words of encouragement and loyalty in difficult time, or words of compassion and understanding in painful times, or just words of interest to hear what’s going on here, or just a "Happy New Year" to your German community. Nothing. Ever.

Isn’t this interesting? Even after I had spoken with you about this several times, nothing changed. I guess you will be the only leader in the world, who is treating their so committed and dedicated persons in leading positions with such an arrogance and ignorance. At least I hope that there will be only one in this world.

Your set up is perceived by me as a very clever one. You certainly know how to make money. To combine a personal profit business as a spiritual teacher, who is offering courses for very good money, with a non profit organisation, which has the subtitle: "A spiritual journey in service" is almost brilliant. Instead of the need to hire people for all the work, which you can not manage alone in your business, everybody is obligated by the set ups of your system to participate as volunteers - in service. Sure, you are telling the students, it will help them tremendously to build their so important muscles - and also to prepare themselves for their own education in various important positions within the community.

It is fascinating to experience and to watch these great carrots and explanations, which only benefit one bank account - yours. Are you aware, how much money you would have to invest for all the employees you would need to keep your system running as you set it up, if you (and not the members and the organisation as practised now as first steps in some areas) would pay everybody fairly based on the market prices - means, if you would have set up your profit business in the usual way? Am I allowed to even say: in the correct way?

It is time to count and to get an awareness Faye.

Your focus is still on exposing the truth of any kind of abuse, right? Well, with this letter I will begin once again (after uncountable attempts in these 9 years) to help to expose the truth of abuse within TIP. And I just exposed the first one. The official set ups from you and the organisations are human distaining from my view of things and therefore highly abusive. The work in service is taken for granted and not even honoured, appreciated and thanked for by you, who has the only big benefit of all this work in service by not having to hire persons for all this work.

I am wondering, how you can be with yourself with such set up as a spiritual person - but esp. as a spiritual teacher, who is using ( abusing?) the student body to get everything done without any payment. And I don’t care anymore. You need to look at yourself in the mirror each day, if you do this at all... do you? I did everything I could in these 9 years to help you and the Boards to understand the incorrectness of these set ups, which got now confirmed by lawyers, as you know very well. Did you tell your students, that at least in two countries your set ups are legally not accepted?

I am sure, you did not. I assume, as always the membership will be not informed about the full truth and the Boards will now find solutions with you, which benefit you again. The results then will be certainly presented to the membership in a very clear and charming way as the only and the best way to deal with some problems, which came up. Bla, bla, bla - there is no equal involvement of problem resolving processes with the members within this organisation.

Speaking about the membership I want once again to question, why in NA you need to be in level VI to be a voting and an active member. I experience this as a highly manipulative and controlling decision, counting on, that with level VI the students are enough "trained" (= manipulated?, brain washed?) to act in your interest, or at least to follow your guidance. Why else shouldn’t all the members at least from level II on have a right as adults to vote and to participate actively within their own organisation? Some of these younger level students are older than you and some are more professional trained as you and the older levels and the leadership. I am sure, they will have great inputs.

Why are they kept like children, who have first to grow up once again in their lives - like going again through puberty - till they are in level VI before they are allowed to vote and to become a board member, if there is not a hidden agenda involved? Nothing else makes really sense, or? Everybody can notice how many board members are resigning in short time periods, even as older levels. So, what is the difference, if younger levels would say after 1 or 2 or 3 years: enough for me as an active Board member? There will be obviously no difference.

The only difference is that they are not yet involved in the beginning of the "big story", which starts in level VI. From here on the teacher - student relationship shifts in a big way!!! I am very, very concerned that a hidden agenda from you Faye dominated the decision, to only allow level VI and up to vote and to be able to become a board member. I certainly will do some more researches by asking the ones, who were at the very first Boards and who made these decisions together with you. I will report more about this then in the future.

And by announcing this, I want to clarify, that with this letter I am only starting to write about the discovered truth of abuse, which I and so many others had so painfully to experience within TIP.

For today there is one more urgent point to bring forward.

How is Sensei? ( Faye’s wolf-dog) How often have you accused people for attacking Sensei and making him very sick? Even by naming these attacking persons behind their backs? How often was the whole community, including myself, in deep concern regarding Sensei, sending him and you "tons" of light and energetic support to go through another crisis? I just love Sensei and you have witnessed, while I was staying with you at your place, that we two had a very unique, beautiful and loving contact to each other.

It is with an extreme righteous anger I am coming forward now, to let everybody know, that it is reported to me by very trustworthy persons that you Faye had beaten up Sensei continuously with your fists in your not controllable rage. It is reported by one person, that you started this already, when he was still a puppy. This person thought, you are going to kill your Sensei by the amount of rage and heavy, heavy hits he had to take already as a baby. I have heard then, that you still had beaten him up as long as you have lived in Auburn, which is not too long ago.

How often have I and all of us been asked to support him, because he got attacked and is not doing well, because in truth you had beaten him up?????? How often ???????

Are you aware, that even animals have a healthy pride and dignity, which gets destroyed by beating them up??? Letting them pay for something humans are not willing to get help for themselves - like a not accountable, controllable rage??? It is called soul-murder, whenever a living being gets broken and violated in its dignity. The worst case is, to steal the dignity!!!! No matter, whether it is a human being or an animal! We are all one! Are you aware?

It looks "so good" to everybody - to the outside, how you are with Sensei. As so often in an abusive scenario for so many kids, animals and even adults!

I am sure, you in NA will have laws in place as we do in Germany to protect animals for any harm. I will do researches. I am after this now Faye - in a ruthless way. The exposure of the truth of abuse does not stop because it is about you Faye. It is time, to expose experienced abuse by you as ruthless as you always demanded it. Let us focus now on you, after you had focused on everybody else in all these years, but never on yourself.

I am sure you don’t mind, that I am writing about this without coming back to you first. I just "copy" or "clone" your style, which you must like, otherwise it wouldn’t be your style. My difference is still that I am doing it openly, because I personally don’t like your style of acting, influencing, ruining personal reputations and attacking behind the back of so many of your students.

I have much more to share and to expose and I will continue to do this in the near future by using this link: open letters to Faye

ONLY IN TRUTH WE CAN HEAL! And this is a true statement in level I! I am still following this teaching of you Faye - never mind whether this is yours or a "stolen" one, like most of the meditational techniques in level I, as we can proof it now with very sad hearts. None of us ever thought that we as teachers have been so betrayed by you, Faye. It is a BIG one.

ONLY IN TRUTH WE CAN HEAL - is a true statement. From whomever it comes.

2nd open letter to Faye Fitzgerald from Christiane, Germany

"If you want contact to me you need to be nice to me" ..."very nice". This is a statement from the founder and teacher Faye Fitzgerald to me, the ex-executive director in Germany, trying to inform her about serious developments within the ex-German community.

My hair goes still up reconnecting to this statement. Doesn't this sound like the abuser's voice speaking to a child? "If you want contact to me you need to be nice to me"...."very nice". 

Whatever "nice" means for you Faye, it is interesting, that you are asking for it, being the one who continuously rages at people and causes so much harm for so many persons. Treat others as you want to be treated Faye. Don't be astounded that so many people get so angry at you in your life. It is a sign of health to not accept such treatments and to express righteous anger, if the dignity gets violated. It is a sign of severe damage, active wounding and sincere dependency to you to be quiet and acceptant, if your emotional abusive behaviour hits the Self or others. Or even in the worst case to be thankful for such a disrespectful treatment, which you personally would not ever accept for yourself.

"You do not lead by hitting people over the head - that's assault, not leadership".

---Dwight D. Eisenhower

Who are you? Who do you think you are? Does it feel good to control the masses with your rage? Do you feel powerful because of this? Why are you not taking finally responsibility and get immediate professional help for all your unresolved personal dynamics? How many more students need to go through despair, hurt and harm because of your not controllable rage and all these disgusting projections you are putting on them, because you are unwilling to acknowledge in a responsible way your own horrific damage?

What does it take, that you will start to look at yourself, to get professional help and to stop to blame always the other? Do you realise how many persons tried very hard in so many years to support you by giving you honest feed backs, so that you can get an awareness of the impact of your harmful behaviour and your disrespectful, humiliating and degrading style for others? Will you ever be able to perceive such feed backs as a loving support instead of attack? Do you realize, what your world picture of constant attack has done to you?

“Battle not with monsters lest ye become a monster and if you gaze into the abyss the abyss gazes into you.” ---Friedrich Nietzsche

When and how will this ever stop? Each time you hurt another, you are hurting yourself.

LOVE OF THE SELF is the answer. And this is only possible if you hold the focus constantly on the Self instead exclusively on the others. I hope you will learn soon to be nice to yourself...very nice...., whatever this means for you. It takes you. Nobody else. It takes only you.

No matter how much you are demanding, how people have to be with you. No matter how much you abuse your power to make critical healthy student- rebels wrong, small, sick with the intend to break them, because they don't function as you want it. No matter how many terrible accusations you are spreading out behind their backs, ruining their reputations. No matter how much you are judging now the ones, who get finally active to expose their experiences within TIP - esp. with you and the leadership - publicly. No matter how many disgusting words and expressions you will use to put once again those down, who use their freedom of speech - the freedom of sharing - the freedom of exposure.

"The only way to make sure people you agree with can speak is to support the rights of people you don't agree with" ---Eleanor Holmes Norton

Calling them "terrorists" with "conscious evil intend" because they use their civil rights to help to get an awareness of all the incorrect and abusive dynamics within TIP is only a deep confirmation for all the concerns, which are already publicly shared. Much more will come.

"So long as the people do not care to exercise their freedom, those who wish to tyrannize will do so; for tyrants are active and ardent, and will devote themselves in the name of any number of gods, religious and otherwise, to put shackles upon sleeping men".  ---Voltaire

You and the leadership are only outing yourself. And this is actually very helpful for the full exposure of your dynamics of control, manipulation and degrading disrespect towards anybody who is open, honest and free of your influence and dominion.

Christiane

Christiane, Germany

February 11, 2007

In May it will be 2 years that I freed myself from the cult "Training in Power".

I feel free and also strongly anchored in my true being again. My perspective for the conception of man and the world shifted from the minimum of the programmed 45° in this cult TIP again to the universal given 360°.

I am a full participant as a human being again on this planet and I allow my spirit to fly - as far as it wants to fly.

After I resigned I felt first like a bird, which was held prisoner in a very small cage for a decade of her life.

Could I fly right away, being out of the cult-cage after 10 years ? No!

Way too much damage and wounding had happened from way too many people in this cult to my beautiful spirit, soul and being. I haven’t had enough healthy and strong feathers left to just fly. I was just one of these cult survivors with all the typical post traumatic stress symptoms you can read about here at Diane’s site: "Lessons in Awareness".

With the help of my wonderful friends, my beloved family and my excellent therapist I started to remember more and more, how I could fly before I have been in this cult. I remembered my original strength, my independency, my big heart filled with empathy for every living being, my ability to love, my joy and fun in my life, my humour, my curiosity and my unmovable willingness to work for betterment with dedication, passion and a profound knowledge and wisdom. And I could allow all these gifts - and much more - to govern again my life.

"We seek peace, knowing that peace is the climate of freedom" ---Dwight D. Eisenhower

Seeking inner peace is the main key in my recovery. No more battles! What a relief ! No more focusing on the negativity! Wow - what a difference! I accept the reality of negativity in this world, but I won’t ever focus on it as I had to in this cult. Isn’t there this energetic / physics law - as much as we focus on something, as much it will expand?

Am I already fully recovered? NO!

And this is ok. I understand that it will take time and a lot of ongoing willingness to be very aware, at which places I am still programmed by the cult’s teachings. My goal is clear and unmovable: I want to be completely healed from any impact this founder and this cult has had in my life. And I will get there - this is no question for me anymore!

The recovery from all the emotional damage done to me, by all these human disdaining experiences of being yelled and screamed at, being put down and made wrong and sick, being publicly humiliated and degraded, being badly spoken about behind my back, having had my reputation destroyed behind my back and having been called an “attacker”, because I spoke up and wanted to help to get an awareness of incorrect dynamics within this group ------ all this traumatizing damage is also not fully healed yet ... it is too deep - too harmful - too hurtful. And the day will come, that I will be also fully recovered from these real attacks in my life!

Remember: This founder, who is still treating lots of her students as I got treated, will save the world --- thank you very much- I am not interested! I will not even start to imagine how the world would be, if this cult leader would have the dominion ...I suggest that all the leaders, eldest and ministers of this cult go first now back in the kindergarten (editors note: an expression used in the training by Faye to say that in level 6 you are still in kindergarten) to start again with the life-school. In each kindergarten you will find more respect, tolerance, the freedom of speech, the acceptance of different opinions and co-creation as in this cult.

Respect is back in my life. It is eye opening and amazing to realize that respect is a very natural and very important standard for so many people / communities in this world. Even for people who don’t have any education, training or any interest in spiritual teachings - but they would always stand up for a genuine respect towards each other in any situation. How powerful and healthy!

"None are so hopelessly enslaved as those, who falsely believe they are free"---Goethe

I am still thinking sometimes of all these good and beautiful people / friends, who are still caught in this cult. These moments are saddening. I wish all of them well - and I hope the day will come, at which they will start to awake.

Can I fly now - almost 2 years after I regained my freedom? YES !!!

I am flying again. I have again enough strong feathers - I can therefore follow again my own destiny. My spirit can fly...and fly, wherever it wants to go - and also stop whenever wanted. My eyes and my heart are open again for the beauty, the brilliance and the sweetness in myself, in people around me and also in this world. Freedom is back in my life !

"Freedom has its life in the hearts, the actions, the spirit of man and so it must be daily earned and refreshed - else like a flower cut from its life-giving roots, it will wither and die" ---Dwight D. Eisenhower