Chapter 20
“Reach for the stars in the sky, the moment is always right, just reach for them now...”
Tina closed her eyes for a moment. He was singing again. Great. She slumped down on the ground beside Damon. Something poked her in her rear and from underneath her she pulled out a -- she yelped -- a leg! Touching the thing as little as possible she tossed it as far as she could and then repeatedly wiped her fingers against her jacket. Disgusting.
She sighed, crossed her legs and leaned her chin in her hand, her gaze on Damon. Petsha's threat had driven them out of the silent graveyard and into the battlefield where she could see firsthand Damon’s rage and what he was capable of, and it wasn’t a pleasant sight.
Her eyes slid over the plain where Damon in his beast form had ripped through rows and rows of soldiers, and where the limp and torn bodies had flown around, spraying the ground red, before she zoomed in on Damon again, watching him as he rocked his body, singing. When they had arrived in this memory, he had warned her that his mind might soon drift away and that she would have to wait until he regained his strength, hoping that his memories wouldn’t frighten her too much.
Something fell on Tina’s shoulder and she quickly shoved it away. She shifted closer to Damon, her hand found his and she laced their fingers and nuzzled closer, something she wouldn't have dared if he had been in his right mind. She gazed up at him. So she loved him, huh? She’d known that she had a crush on him, but love... she hadn’t expected that. She frowned. When had she fallen in love with him?
Damon, who was murmuring to himself, gave her a soft smile, squeezed her fingers before he brought her hand to his lips and kissed it.
This version of Damon, where he didn’t seem to remember her or know where he was, where he was an echo of his usual self lost in his memories, probably thought she was Trinity, and that stung. Why did it sting? It wasn’t like she expected a happily-ever-after with him; she actually didn't even wish for a happily-ever-after with him, not if being with him meant she would end up as Trinity's replacement. She wanted to be loved for who she was, not because she carried the mark of Beloved in her soul or because Trinity had kept her company inside her soul for a spell. “Why don't you love me?” she breathed.
He stopped his singing. “But I do love you.” He cupped her cheeks and drew her closer.
She covered his hands with hers, staring at the face that neared until it became a blur. Her heart hammered in her chest and her breathing accelerated as the soft lips touched hers. She shouldn't let him -- no, letting him kiss her was indulging herself, not him. And she couldn’t indulge herself. She wouldn’t, except this time. But just this time. Just this once. Her eyelids fluttered closed.
He slipped his tongue into her mouth.
Her fingers dug into Damon’s shoulders as she opened herself to the caress, to the sweetness that filled her heart, her soul. This shouldn’t feel so good. So unfair.
He deepened the kiss, seducing her with sweeps of his tongue.
So unfair. She sighed into the kiss.
His touch disappeared for a second and she pushed herself away from him.
“Trinity?” He reached out for her.
She moved backwards. She was such a fool. “It’s Tina.”
His image shimmered and she thought that he would recognize her, but he didn’t. He sat there with his head tilted and his eyebrows raised and she felt the urge to hit him or at least pull on his braids. “Go on, sing.”
She turned away from him and crossed her arms, her gaze lost in the distance. She tried to ignore his presence as he moved closer, tried to ignore the hand he put on her shoulder and which she shook off.
She took a deep breath. Waiting, huh? She wasn’t good at waiting, hated it actually, but there was nothing else she could do. So frustrating.
Nothing that she could do. She peeked at Damon. Except hanging out with him. She tried to think of something, anything, to distract herself from thinking about Damon and about where she was. I wish Muriel or Haniel were here. They were always so good at distracting me.
Her pupils widened. Muriel! Maybe there was something she could do. She closed her eyes and pictured Muriel’s face before her. She didn’t want to call him, not yet, but... Would she really be able to transport him with her without seeing him? She imagined his body curled beside her, his hands touching her arm and his legs entangled with hers, the position in which he spent so much time as they shared the Sarniikzi.
Something tingled. She slightly turned her head, trying to sense what it was. She could feel it, the warmth of another body against her side and a hot breath against her shoulder. Muriel?
Could she make contact with Muriel from inside Damon’s mind? He could hear her; she knew that from the previous times when she had called for him to wake her up, but the thought of them establishing a connection and using it for easier transportation had never crossed her mind. She called out again, Muriel! Muriel! Can you hear me?
After sometime she tried again. Muriel! Muriel!
She felt a tug and she resisted it. Don’t wake me up. Don’t you dare. Just let me know if you can hear me.
She listened to the silence that ruled in her head, trying to block out all the noise coming from outside. She heard a whisper but she couldn’t comprehend the words. Not yet, anyway. She focused on the blackness behind her eyelids, on the dots of lights that danced before her and she drew Muriel’s face from them. Can you hear me?
The whisper become louder and the syllables formed into words she could understand.
She couldn’t help but smile. He could hear her. I’m with Damon, she said, and he’s in really bad shape.
There’s nothing we can do.
We have to get him out.
But you can’t, you are not ready yet.
No, she wasn’t, not really, but they couldn’t afford to wait and she told Muriel that. She had promised Damon that she would save him and it might be too late as it was. I need your help.
Tina, I... I can’t. Uriel --
If you are not willing to help, I will try it on my own, and she meant it. Damon was a jerk and he brought her nothing but trouble, but she needed to save him, not just because she had promised him, but because of Trinity, because of the Dumes, and because she wasn’t ready to part with him, not yet.
I will contact Uriel.
She groaned. The first thing Uriel would do would be to wake her up, and the tugs she felt a short time later were proof of that. She fought them, with her eyes still tightly shut, she shifted closer to Damon, wrapped her arms tightly around his shoulders and refused to let go. Stop it!
I’m not doing anything, Muriel said.
Then tell Uriel to stop it.
Tell me yourself.
Uriel. Tina grimaced. She could have convinced Muriel, but not Uriel. Please, we have to do something.
Are you willing to risk your life for it? Willing to risk Muriel’s life?
There has to be something.
Tina...
Uriel was about to lecture, to point out all the stupidity of her actions, she could feel it. No! Please. There were half a dozen reasons why they should try to do anything in their power to rescue Damon and she could have come up with a hundred more, but none of them would have swayed Uriel. She tensed her jaw. She didn’t want to say it, not to Uriel, but it was the only thing that might make him change his mind. I love him. Uriel, please. I love him. I can’t leave him.
Silence descended in her mind and stretched out, broken only by her breathing and the sound of the lullaby that here and there oozed into her head as the seconds ticked away. Uriel?
Uriel sighed. Try it, then.
The corners of her mouth turned upwards, but she didn’t dare celebrate yet. The first thing she had to do was get Damon conscious of his surroundings and make him show her where he was being held.
She opened one eye, then another. She didn’t know if the connection would hold. Can you hear me?
Yes, Uriel said.
She turned her attention to Damon. She moved in front of him and trapped his face between her hands. “Damon.”
He looked at her.
“Can you become conscious?”
He frowned.
“Can you open your eyes?”
“My eyes are open.”
She hung her head. It probably wouldn’t work if she slapped him, huh? She sighed. How could she explain to him what she wanted? “Listen, you do know where we are?”
His frown deepened as he looked around. “In my nightmare.”
“Yes, something like that. We are in here.” She pointed at his forehead. “Can you show me, erm...” What was the word she was looking for? “Outside? The real world?” No, he wouldn’t understand that. She bit her lip and looked at him. He wasn’t a child, he looked to her more like a shell without any knowledge of things beyond his happy memories; not stupid, just ignorant.
“Outside?”
“Yes, outside.”
Damon stood up and pulled her up with him. “I know where outside is. I’ll show you.” He gestured for her to follow him.
The surroundings around them changed; a small clearing with dirty white tents framed with forest replaced the battlefield, but she could still hear the sounds of steel and death coming from somewhere behind them.
A child’s cry echoed through the forest and more voices joined in.
Damon’s hand found hers, his fingers trembled against hers, and his pace accelerated as he almost dragged her with him past the tents, toward the large tree a stone’s throw away.
They went through the glittering surface, through part of the tree and stepped into a small, dark and empty room.
“Here.” He pointed at the wall.
There was nothing there. Tina closed the little distance that separated her from it. It was just a wall. She touched it. A wall with the smoothness of glass. What was she going to do now? Tell Uriel that she had come to a dead end? -- No. She had understood from the beginning that saving Damon her way wouldn’t be easy, and it was not like her to give up so easily. She had already put so much effort into mastering her poor space distortion ability, she wouldn’t give up or let despair to overtake her because she faced a blank, black wall.
“Damon.” She twisted around and her hand would have grabbed his if it hadn’t passed through it. “Damon?”
Damon’s body shimmered and dark fur and fangs flashed.
She stumbled backwards until she was stopped by the wall. Was he going to change into the beast again?
The beast disappeared and Damon reached out for her. “I have frightened you. I’m sorry, but I can’t help it. It surfaces when I’m the weakest.” His fingers wrapped around her wrist as he observed his surroundings. A scowl appeared on his face.
“What is it?”
He pulled her away from the wall. “There’s not much time left. You should leave.”
“We have already been through this.” She wiggled her hand out from his. “You are not going to change my mind.”
“Soon the beast is going to overpower me completely and when that happens...” He rested his hands on her shoulders. “You are not safe here.”
“I know that.” She slapped his hands away. “That’s why I don’t understand why you are wasting your time and energy on trying to change my mind. Just wake up already.”
“It’s not that easy.”
“Yes, I assumed that much.”
“But you are not letting it go.”
“No.”
“You are as stubborn as she was.”
Tina narrowed her eyes, knowing perfectly well who he meant. “I’m not Trinity.”
“No, you are not.” He slid his hand along her arm. “But you two do share some characteristics.”
“Yeah, whatever.” She pushed him away but he didn’t budge. “Come on, can you just --”
“What if I decline?”
She stared at him. “What are you talking about?”
He released her and stepped back. “I only have enough strength to either try to wake up or...”
“Or?” She stepped forward maintaining the same distance.
He combed through his hair.
“Or?”
“Or to end it all.”
He was the same as them. Tina ground her teeth. “Was this your plan from the start?”
“Maybe.”
How could he give up so easily? Why? She rubbed her temples. Actually she knew the reasons and she wanted to be angry, to stomp her foot and to cry, “I’m here, don’t I count?” But that wouldn’t be fair, not when she had thought about taking Uriel’s concoction and then becoming Haniel’s or Muriel’s Beliya. “How can I save you and fulfil my promise, then?”
“I will absolve you.”
Giving up on him would be so easy. Just a quick goodbye before Muriel would wake her up, but she was done with choosing the easy way out, she told him that and asked him not to choose the easy way either. Her fingers dug into his chest, she crumpled the fabric of his shirt in her fists. She could feel wetness in the corners of her eyes. Tears of frustration, probably. “Please.”
He sighed and closed his eyes. When he opened them they were intense emeralds scrutinizing her. “You can’t guarantee success.”
“No, I can’t, but I am willing to risk my life trying.”
“That’s what I’m afraid of.” His knuckles caressed her cheek. “What if something happens to you? The Dumes will kill me.”
“Like you are afraid of them.”
His lips curved in a small smile. “Maybe a little.”
“You are making fun of me.”
“No, I’m not.” He towered over her, his face getting closer and closer as he bent down.
Her breath caught in her throat, she thought he was going to kiss her, but only their noses touched.
A smirk stretched his mouth. “I’m flattered that you love me so much that you are willing to die for me.”
“Don’t be stupid.” She wanted to wiggle out of the prison of his arms, but she couldn’t move an inch.
“No?” He raised his brows; the smirk still lingered on his face. “A sacrifice then.” He turned her around. “Because this is something Trinity would do.”
“No. I’m doing this for myself.” She fixed her palms against the wall, frowning when she could feel his chest against her back and see his arms leaning on the smooth surface beside her head. “Hey, what are you doing?”
“Making your wish come true.”
“What? What wish?”
“Be quiet.”
“No.” She twisted in her hold.
“And stop squirming. I can’t concentrate like that.” His breath felt hot against her temple.
“Concentrate on what?” She managed to grab something. One of his braids. She pulled on it, hard.
“Stop doing that. Be a good girl.” He pulled his hair out of her clutches, pressed her body flush against the wall and with his chin forced her to look forward.
Her pupils dilated. She could view the light through the wall; the blackness now looked like somebody had swept a layer of dust from the glass. “Are you doing this?”
“Yes.” Damon rested his chin on her shoulder. “But once I wake up, I don’t know how long I can stay conscious. You will have to act quickly. And if I change into the beast, don’t hesitate to kill me.”
She nodded and swallowed the uneasiness that leaped forward before she contacted Uriel and Muriel and told them to be ready. She could feel something solid and warm in her empty hand, and she could imagine Muriel’s hand in hers.
The wall became more and more transparent; she could already distinguish outlines of objects in the space on the other side of the wall.
This was it. She took deep breaths before focusing on Muriel, visualising him beside her, while searching for a place in the space that spread before her.
A person in a lab coat crossed her line of vision and passed between the counters.
There. Just beyond the counter, beside the low cabinet positioned to the left of what looked like a nature-made wall seemed like a good place. Everything was still a little blurry, but she could see it well enough.
“Take care, okay?” Damon wrapped his almost transparent arms around her shoulders before the body behind her slowly disappeared.
She concentrated on the place and on Muriel, just like she had practiced so many times. Her body started to tingle, like before, and in next moment she found herself standing behind the counter, empty-handed.
She slumped down, biting her lip, glowering at where she could see Muriel’s contour.
Try again, Muriel’s voice said.
I can? She could? But people could get out of in between space only on their own, hadn’t Uriel said so? Who cared? If Muriel said that she could, she could. She focused on Muriel, blocking out everything else. She saw him beside her, she could feel his hand in hers.
“Tina.”
It didn’t sound like it was coming from her head. She dug her nails into the palm she held and at the sound of a small hiss she opened her eyes. Muriel. A weight fell from her shoulders and she jumped on him and wrapped her arms around him. They were saved. Now all they had to do was get to Damon and Muriel could transport them home.
“What’s going on? Why are all the people running around?” Muriel whispered.
“What?” She frowned and gazed around. The wrinkle on her forehead deepened at the people rushing by and at the jumble of cries and yells.
“Look.” Muriel pointed at one of the plastic sheets that were set in a row in the large space that looked like cave with a low ceiling.
She squinted her eyes and as she saw the contents of the plastic bag in the steel frame her hand covered her gaping mouth. Damon was inside, and he struggled with the wrapping, probably, in an effort to get out. “They have people inside those.” Rows and rows of people.
“Yes. Maybe I should call the others.”
“We have to get closer to save him.” Tina bent low and dashed from behind the cabinet, her eyes searching for anything that she could use as a weapon.
There. A lab assistant had a gun aimed at Damon. She had to get it.
She slowed down time, used the space distortion, and a few seconds later the assistant lay on the tiled floor and she held the gun in her hand.
Time accelerated and she was about to either give the gun to Muriel, who appeared beside her, or use it to threaten the people occupied with Damon, when a roar pierced the air and the walls shook.
The ground jerked under her and she fell face-first, catching herself in the last moment before her face would have smashed against the floor. Debris rained down, hitting her back, her legs and a small bit landed on her head. That hurt. She rolled around. What was that? An earthquake?
Another roar and another tremor of the floor.
It wasn’t an earthquake, it was -- she looked up -- Damon.