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Cellars 2: The New Era
Cellars 2: The New Era
TToT and Friends
These are the Cellars, starting (oldest at the bottom) from the move to Peet's Place on 2013-02-25
A Note About Links: Expired threads in Peet's Place are promptly deleted. The original URLs (where available) are preserved here to cover the possibility that someone-somewhere has archived material that might, someday, be restored to a server. The topmost entry will (assuming BG59 keeps this site up-to-date) normally be the link to the current Cellar. The next link down should still work for a while after a new Cellar has started - clicking on any entry further down the list will (for now) normally generate an error message.
(19) .... to anticipate in the cellar? [started 2016-03-07]
Chris Ghoti's Intro to this Cellar:
Here we are, outside the nineteenth cellar in Peet's Mustardland.
Sprung has sprung (or so they tell me) and the grass is riz (only it hasn't yet). It is too cold this week to feed the goldfish. Still, in honour of the season, let us have a cellar decorated in white and yellow (for the daffodils, which in my case I have not got) and pale green (for the new grass ditto) and pale blue (for the sky, which is clear, and means we'll have another frost)..... Let us anticipate Spring!
Under the sign by the dark old oak door, which reads
DRINKS ARE
NOT ALLOWED
ON THE OUTSIDE
there is a flight of stairs leading down into the Cellar. If you choose, you can take the trapeze at the top of the steps and swing down over the cellar, with safe landing on a trampoline below; if you feel more pedestrian, go by stairs.
At the bottom it is warm, and cosy; a log fire is burning in the inglenook grate, where there are toasting forks for marshmallows and toast, and mulled wine sitting in a bowl at the side. Comfortable chaises in a variety of colours are drawn up around the fire, and there are furry rugs on the floor. Beside the fire is the kist full of shawls for chilly tarts.
On one side of the room is the Bar, with any drink you care to mention and some that you wouldn't care to, and also an Aga and a stove and food cupboards and a freezer and fridges.
In the wall above the Chatelaine's chaise is the other cupboard.
In the space beside the racks of wine is a passage which leads through a brown velvet curtain to the hot-tub and jacuzzi.
The other other cupboard near the passage contains various pub-games: the shove-ha'penny board, the dominoes and the Nine Man Morris table are there. The usual billiard table is nearby, with the astrolabe sitting under it, and there is piano just in case. The On Sweet has a re-repaired metal mirror... and has been re-feathered; above it a glitter-ball is turning gently and throwing flecks of light around the ceiling.
All the servitors are present and correct: Darrington the butler, Ewbank, the Page Three Pages and the Underfoot Men are waiting to do our every bidding and fulfil our every whim, Honoré FitzMichael the pantler has provisioning in hand, the re-upholstering lady Gwyneth and her team of seamstresses are longing to upholster any chaise which is not the colour which suits someone's fancy, and the Fancy Italian is trying to be generally helpful (and very trying it sometimes is); we have Luigi to make us tea, Antonio the coffee-maker and Fritz the chocolatier.
I am hoping Cider Rosy may make us a garland and Carinthia a kissing bough?
Remember, Tarts: Never say no to a Medicinal.
(18) . . . to revel in the cellar? [started 2015-12-01]
Chris Ghoti's Intro to this Cellar:
Well, here we are again, a new Cellar to make merry in! That makes our eighteenth cellar in Peet's Place, sixty-three cellars in total since Tuesday, 17th August 2010. Persistent lot that we are.
Come on in and join the fun; take the trapeze at the head of the steps if you're so inclined (there is a trampoline for a soft landing, if a slightly repetitious one) or you can walk down with dignity, to where the log fire is burning in the huge fireplace with a spit, and a shovel for roasting chestnuts, and toasting-forks for marsh-mallows or toast. Beside it is a kist of warm shawls in case anyone needs to wrap up a little. There are bowls of punch in the inglenook just waiting for the tarts to get round to them; there is mulled wine with slices of orange and lemon cooking gently in it as well as cloves and other good herbs. Out of the way of the trapeze, the glitter-ball is turning gently and throwing flecks of light around the ceiling. Pull up a chaise and be comfy.
The room is decorated in cheerful reds and oranges, nice warm colours for a cold day. The re-upholsterer Gwyneth and her team of seamstresses are at hand ready to re-upholster any chaise which may need it.
Darrington the butler, his assistant Ewbank, and Honoré FitzMichael the pantler are all ready to provide any food or drink which is required; these are delivered by the Page Three Pages and the Underfoot Men, who are Here To Help (according to their tabards, and where they got those Lord only knows -- I hope they will give them up when things get warmer in the Cellar.) Between them and The Fancy Italian, Luigi to make us tea, Antonio the coffee-maker and Fritz the chocolatier, we should lack for nothing.
In winter, the aga is in the main cellar, away at one end with the other stove, the freezers and the food-cupboards; the Other Cupboard is in the wall above the Chatelaine's Chaise as usual.
At the end of the corridor beyond the red velvet curtain there are a hot-tub and a jacuzzi, also a sauna; collect a few logs from the log-basket as you go for a sauna.
In the main cellar, off by the dance-floor and the piano (underneath which there is an astrolabe) we have various pub-games such as the shove-ha'penny board, the dominoes and the Nine Man Morris table; there are packs of cards, and a table for playing marbles on (with high sides). There is also a billiard table and a dart-board, the latter well out of the way and with its own light.
The On Sweet has a re-repaired metal mirror, and has been re-feathered for the comfort of That Bird.
Carinthia, is there a chance of a kissing-bough? And maybe if we are lucky Cider Rosy might look in for long enough to make us a garland?
(17) . . . to frivol in the cellar? [started 2015-09-01]
Chris Ghoti's Intro to this Cellar:
Past the goats and the many ducks splashing in the succession-ponds under the Immemorial Oak with the rope-swing, you will find a building, old and empty-looking, but with the sounds of revelry coming from somewhere inside it. The shutters are over all the windows, and there are small trees growing in the gutter up behind the false facade, and yet.... Music? Laughter? The chink of glasses?
What can it be, behind this door on which are written the words
DRINKS ARE
NOT ALLOWED
ON THE OUTSIDE
?
Step through the porch (mind the hens!), open the door and join us. As it says on the plaque above that door, you should
Never say no to a Medicinal
This is our 17th Cellar in Peet's Place, and the 62nd in total. In honour of our Chatelaine's imminent holiday, it is decorated in red, orange and white; red and orange for the walls, and white paintwork.
Take the trapeze, if you are feeling daring, and swing on down to land on the trampoline; if not, descend the stairs in a dignified manner, then settle on a chaise and relax with one of the drinks provided at any time by Darrington, our butler. If Darrington is not there, Ewbank his deputy is on duty, as well as the Page Three Pages and the Underfoot Men, who come and go, fetch and carry, and generally make themselves useful.
If you want your chaise re-upholstered, Gwyneth and her team wait, needles at the ready, to do it for you.
Honoré FitzMichael the pantler will supply you with anything you fancy to eat, as well as having a team to help him: Fritz the chocolatier, The Fancy Italian, Luigi to make us tea, and Antonio the coffee-maker. They are to be found in the kitchen off the main room, where there is an Aga and an ordinary stove, freezers and food-cupboards.
The Other Cupboard is in the wall above the Chatelaine's Chaise. The racks of booze are in the corridor at the other end of the cellar, and also behind the bar, which is where the spirits are to be found.
At the end of the corridor behind the velvet curtain are the hot-tub, the jacuzzi and the sauna; take some logs from the basket just beyond the curtain with you if a sauna is what you fancy.
We have various pub-games: the shove-ha'penny board, the dominoes and the Nine Man Morris table, cards and dice. There is also a billiard table, which for some reason lost in the mists of time has an astrolabe under it. There is also a piano in case anyone wants to play it, and a sprung dance-floor in case anyone feels like dancing to what they play.
There is a glitter-ball hanging from the ceiling casting sparkles around the walls, and glinting off the mirror in the newly re-fitted On Sweet for That Bird.
I am hoping that before she leaves the Chatelaine may make us a kissing-bough, and if we are lucky, Cider Rosy a garland?
Oh: those ducks. I am unsure where they came from, but the eggs make excellent omelettes. The Indian Runner Ducks ducks (and one drake) are runner-duck breed-colours: apricot, chocolate, blue, blue dusky, fawn-and-white, pencilled, mallard, silver, trout, apricot trout, black and of course white.
The Silkie hens are one hen of each colour: one of the non-standard ones, a red bearded silkie, and a partridge silkie, and a cuckoo silkie, and a bearded splash silkie, and a buff silkie, and a chocolate silkie, and a black silkie, and a white bearded silkie, and a golden silkie, and a blue silkie makes eleven, and we have eleven ducks and one drake so that ought to be Enough.
As for the goats, just don't blame me: I didn't invite them, that was Digs. They don't come in down the stairs; they don't like stairs.
(16) . . . to shamble in the cellar? [started 2015-06-21]
Chris Ghoti's Intro to this Cellar:
Having a shamble is what happens when you have drink taken and try to do three things at once, ok? Nothing to do with York. Possibly something to do with the state of the paperwork at that point...
This cellar is decorated to emphasise the Scandinavian nature of my present preoccupations; think of the colours as being from the flags of Denmark, Sweden and Finland, those red, white, pale blue, dark blue and yellow colours. To go with that, I hope Carinthia will come up with a suitable added accoutrement, and maybe we get a garland?
The staff are all there waiting at our beck and/or call (or you could ring a handbell and shout); Darrington is yer Boss Man aka Butler, Ewbank is his deputy, they command the Underfoot Men and the Page Three Pages, and anyone can pass on requests to Honoré FitzMichael the pantler, The Fancy Italian (who may one day do some good or other, I suppose), Luigi to make us tea, Antonio the coffee-maker and Fritz the chocolatier.
Gwyneth and her team of seamstresses are longing to re-upholster in summer colours; just tell them what you want and your chaise will be ready in three shakes of a gnat, or some such arcane measurement of time.
Indoors we still have a stove and an Aga for people to cook on and in, but they are in a different room, this cellar, and there is no fire lit as yet -- let's hope we don't need one. The freezers and food cupboards are in the other room with the stoves, and the Other Cupboard is near Carinthia's chaise in the proper way. The bar and the wine storage is as usual.
For those who don't want to go outside and play croquet, or dive into the succession-pools at whichever temperature appeals to them, or swing into the top pool off the rope in the Old Oak tree and float downstream from pool to pool, there is a jacuzzi and a hot tub at the end of the corridor past the brown velvet curtain.
The trapeze is in place for those who can't be bothered with the stairs, and the trampoline is ready for bouncy landings; the On Sweet has been re-feathered and given a new shiny mirror, and the glitter-ball is up and twirling.
Shall we have a small party?
(15) . . . to mooch in the Cellar [started 2015-03-27]
Chris Ghoti's Intro to this Cellar:
Ah, the joys of a new cellar, clear of empties, rugs glowing and without any peanuts trodden into them.... The woodlice have made themselves busy, and now all is ready for us when we need it.
This is the fifteenth cellar in Peet's, the sixtieth altogether. I think we should call it a diamond anniversary, and have a cellar decorated accordingly. Lots of sparkle, against dark colours: green, blue, crimson, and even black (well, the woodwork), with white and silver highlights and crystals hanging everywhere. Can't afford actual diamonds for all that, but we can make a show anyhow. Perhaps there will be some of the real thing in the kissing-bough.
Gwyneth and her team are waiting ready to re-upholster chaises for anyone who wants a new colour.
The weather is starting to think about being spring some time in the next month or so, but it is still cold at night, so we'll keep the fireplace for the time being, and all the accessories thereto such as the toasting-forks, not to mention the bread-oven set in the ingle. There is also still a kist full of warm shawls, so that we won't get caught out by a late frost.
The food-preparation room is there as usual, with the Aga and the other stove and the hob and the freezer and refrigerator full of good things and the cupboards too; Fritz the chocolatier, The Fancy Italian, Luigi to make us tea and Antonio the coffee-maker lurk there, and so do Ewbank and the Page Three Pages and Underfoot Men. Darrington of course moves in a mysterious way, and is rarely seen at rest anywhere, but he appears when he is summoned, so there is no need for us to try to seek him out. I have always assumed that when each new cellar is dug he makes some private arrangement for his Pantry to be dug and then concealed.
The Other Cupboard is near Carinthia's chaise as usual.
Beyond the kitchen are the jacuzzi and hot-tub, along the corridor behind the velvet curtain.
The trapeze is set near the steps down, and the trampoline is ready for landing on; outside there is the swing which goes out over the succession-pools, close to the warmest one. Also outside, the goats and ducks and hens seem to be happy with the advent of Spring, and are brisking about.
It's a little early in the year for croquet, but the indoor games are all ready for use if they are wanted. The On Sweet has been re-feathered and supplied with a new mirror.
I hope that we may be made a garland at some stage.
Sixty cellars. Coo-er. Maybe we ought to have a party -- except that the cellar is one long party, really.
Oh good: someone has painted "Never say no to a medicinal" over the door.
(14) . . . to dally in the Cellar [started 2015-01-20]
Chris Ghoti's Intro to this Cellar:
In this new cellar (the fourteenth in Peet's, and the fifty-ninth in total), which has 'Never say no to a Medicinal' written above the door, there is a roaring fire in the huge brick grate. There is a spit in case anyone feels like roasting anything on it, and a bread oven and a salt oven built into the walls of the sides, as well as a shelf for keeping the punch and the mulled wine hot on. Toasting forks are hanging on the wall beside it in case of marshmallows or toast. The kist of warm shawls is also against that wall.
The decorations are white, and pale blue, and grey, with bright red accents to reduce the chilly effect. There are also the proper sort of Chinese lanterns, static paper ones, hanging from the beams, except where the trapeze swings down from the doorway and would damage them. The pale decorations give scope for bright colours in the upholstering of the chaises, if anyone wants to go for something vivid; Gwyneth and her helpers would be delighted to produce whatever anyone wants in that line.
In the kitchen there is the usual Aga, and the other stove, and the freezers, and the food-cupboards; the Other Cupboard is of course near Carinthia's chaise.
Darrington the Butler, Ewbank his second-in-command, the Page Three Pages and the Underfoot Men are all waiting to pander to the whims of the Tarts; Honoré FitzMichael the pantler, Antonio the coffee-maker and Fritz the chocolatier are holding themselves ready to bring the Fancy Italian into play, or Luigi to make us tea, as well as to produce their own specialities.
At the end of the corridor past the billiard table, on the other side of the white velvet curtain, there are the hot-tub and the jacuzzi. The pub games live in a cupboard off that short corridor.
The piano has been re-tuned and there is a dance-floor beyond it.
The mirror in the On Sweet has been replaced -- again -- and it has been re- feathered. Never let it be said that I don't do anything for That Sparrow....
Perhaps Cider Rosy is making a garland? and I'm sure Carinthia will contrive a kissing bough somehow.
Outside, the ducks, hens and goats have their own warm sheds in which to take refuge when the cold gets too much for them, so they never need to try to negotiate the stairs down into the cellar.
It was during the course of this Cellar that BG29 passed peacefully away, after a long illness borne stoically and with his characteristic sense of humour.
He was one day short of his eighty-sixth birthday.
(13) . . . to procrastinate in the Cellar [started 2014-11-25]
Chris Ghoti's Intro to this Cellar:
This new cellar is decorated in Holly Green and Santa Red with Mistletoe Ivory highlights; there are fairy lights festooned round the walls, though not across the middle of the room where they would get in the way of That Drat Trapeze. I am unsure that I dare to ask Cider Rosy for a garland, but we can hope. The kissing bough will be Carinthia's responsibility; I reckon pearls to represent mistletoe might be a good idea.
However, the On Sweet is lightproofed and without the least touch of a fairy light. I have got some sense.... and some respect for That Bird's bruvver.
The sign which says Never Say No To A Medicinal has been moved to outside and above the new door into the Vestibule, where people can leave their out-door wraps and boots; from it stairs lead down to the cellar proper. There is a trapeze fastened at the top of the stairs so that people who can't be bothered with climbing down the stairs can swing down instead, landing on a trampoline.
This new cellar is decorated in Holly Green and Santa Red with Mistletoe Ivory highlights; there are fairy lights festooned round the walls, though not across the middle of the room where they would get in the way of That Drat Trapeze. I am unsure that I dare to ask Cider Rosy for a garland, but we can hope. The kissing bough will be Carinthia's responsibility; I reckon pearls to represent mistletoe might be a good idea.
The sign which says Never Say No To A Medicinal has been moved to outside and above the new door into the Vestibule, where people can leave their out-door wraps and boots; from it stairs lead down to the cellar proper. There is a trapeze fastened at the top of the stairs so that people who can't be bothered with climbing down the stairs can swing down instead, landing on a trampoline.
All the usual servitors (and whatever the female of a servitor is if they want to be called it) are ready and waiting to pander to the Cellarites' every whim. They have a kitchen in which to work their little magics, and there is of course a bar with many different forms of boozo -- any that anyone can think of, really.
The goat-shed and poultry-shed are still in the grounds, as they were outside the last cellar; the arrangements for the ducks remain the same as before. There are heating arrangements in all the places where the animals and fowls may wish to sleep, so that they won't get cold during the night.
The various cooking facilities are all in place, and the huge fireplace has room for many logs as well as a hook for a kettle to keep warm on, and a lot of forks for toasting bread or marshmallows or if anyone happens to feel like it, onions. On the shelves beside it, keeping warm, are mulled wine and punch in large bowls, with ladles in them for serving the drinks; the ladles have wooden handles so that they do not become too hot to use.
As with previous cellars, the Other Cupboard is in Carinthia's charge; so is the Other other cupboard.
I have got the pub games out again, just in case, and there is a wind-up gramophone with a proper horn to it for anyone who feels like dancing on the re-pounced floor.
Get settled in, and be comfortable.
(12) . . . to relax in the Cellar [started 2014-09-18]
Chris Ghoti's Intro to this Cellar:
Below the door with the friendly sign over it which says Never Say No To A Medicinal, stairs lead down to the cellar. There is a trapeze fastened at the top so that people who can't be bothered with climbing down the stairs can swing down instead, landing on a trampoline in the cellar proper.
All the staff are on hand to pander to the every whim of the Cellarati; we have Darrington the butler and his deputy Ewbank, assisted by the Page Three Pages and the Underfoot Men; Honoré FitzMichael the pantler, Fritz the Chocolatier, the Fancy Italian (who is essentially useless but would be hurt to be excluded), Antonio the coffee-maker, and Luigi to make us tea wait eagerly to bring us whateverwe may want to eat or drink apartfrom alcohol; and Gwyneth the re- upholstering lady and her team of seamstresses are eager to refurbish any chaise that may need a change.
This cellar is decorated in deep rose pink, with cream and yellow paintwork and dark red bannisters. I am hoping that after she has woken Carinthia will make a kissing bough to suit the decoration, and when Cider Rosy is able to she will make us a garland.
The weather is being unsettled enough for me to feel that it is time to stop using the out-of-doors, and the goat-shed and poultry-shed are both ready for their inhabitants. The ducks of course stay on the pond, but they have a warmer bed if they want one.
Inside we have got out the forks for toasting bread or marshmallows, the spit, and a shovel for roasting chestnuts; there are bowls in the inglenook just waiting for punch to be needed, or mulled wine. The kist of warm shawls is near the fireplace.
The Other Cupboard is in the wall near Carinthia's chaise where she can keep an eye on it; in the room off the main cellar are the Aga, the other stove, the freezers and the food-cupboards, in case anyone wants to cook anything. The hot -tub and jacuzzi are in their usual place at the end of the corridor past the velvet curtain. The On Sweet is re-feathered and has a new mirror in it.
All that is needed now is for us to move in and settle.
(11) . . . to be reinvigorated in the Cellar [started 2014-07-18]
Chris Ghoti's Intro to this Cellar:
It is too hot to do any great deal of design, so I haven't; this new cellar has all that others have had, plus a cool-tub as well as a hot one, for sitting in and avoiding heat-stroke.
The colour scheme came back with me from Scandewegia: just look at the flags of Denmark, Sweden, Norway and Finland -- plus Germany, the Netherlands, Belgium (which is the same as Germany anyhow) and France.
Them's the colours of it.
I am now going to lie about in heaps drinking iced water and complaining about the heat. Luckily it is in the nature of cellars to be temperate.
(10) . . . to forgather in the Cellar [started 2014-05-20]
Chris Ghoti's Intro to this Cellar:
At long last, it seems to be warm enough for us not to need a fire at all, so although the fireplace remains just in case, I have not provided all its accoutrements. We need it there, though, so that it can have "Never say no to a Medicinal" painted over it in a florid scriptiform. The cocktail-fountain has been copied from last cellar and is playing merrily where the fire might have been.
The walls are painted in Farrow and Ball "Mizzle", with the woodwork in the greens of late Spring, such as the chestnut and the beech are at the moment, and a little of the golden weeping willow and greyish oak over the mizzle. Around the skirting there are a few patches of the blue that a bluebell wood is in the distance, and near the woodwork there are patches on the mizzle of the creams of blossoms: elder, may, rowan and chestnut.
Outside, everything has been tidied up ready for summer; the succession-pools have been cleaned out, and heated so that you go from pleasantly warm in the bottom one to bracingly cold at the top, and the rope has been fixed up in the spreading chestnut tree so that you can use it to leap in from. The ducks have their own pond, and seem not to be keen on the warmed water. The hens very properly ignore the whole silly business. The goats take advantage of it to steal and eat stray garments.
The croquet-lawn is shaven smooth. Inside the cellar the chaises are ready, and Gwyneth and her team are at hand to upholster them in any colour required. The on Sweet is re-upholstered already in down, with a mirror. The Underfoot Men and the Page Three Pages are ready to run errands and fetch whatever may be needed, with Darrington the butler and Ewbank his cohort to order who shall come and who shall go, who shall fetch and who shall carry; in the background Honoré FitzMichael the pantler and Fritz the chocolatier are ready to work their wonders, as are Antonio the coffee-maker and Luigi to make us tea. The Fancy Italian is really not very useful, but he is still around. The kitchen is a room of its own, where the stove and the freezers live.
The dance-floor is pounced and the piano is tuned.
The trapeze is set up at the top of the stairs, with the trampoline for soft (if interesting) landings, and beyond the velvet curtain at the end of the corridor the jacuzzi and hot-tub are to be found for relaxing in with a glass of something.
Since the various pub-games have been located and put ready, would anyone like a game of nine-man's morris? Or Hnefatafl?
(09) . . . to rindle in the Cellar [started 2014-04-02]
Chris Ghoti's Intro to this Cellar:
In a spirit of Hope, this (the fifty-fourth cellar, and the ninth in Peet's) is not only decorated in the colours of Spring flowers, Grape Hyacinth Blue, Primrose and Daffodil Yellows and Creams, and the sharp, bright red of the Pyracanthus Berries still on the bush next door to the house.
Darrington the butler, his assistant Ewbank, Honoré FitzMichael the pantler, the Page Three Pages and the Underfoot Men are poised to obey any command they may be given, and the re-upholstering lady Gwyneth and her team of seamstresses are longing to re-upholster any chaise which is felt by its owner to need a change.
I am hoping that as well as Carinthia providing a Kissing-Bough, Cider Rosy might be making a garland?
Over the door are written the important words "Never turn down a Medicinal".
In a spirit of goodwill, a cocktail-fountain has been installed where the huge fireplace might otherwise be, and in case we need warmth, there are two lesser fireplaces to keep the place cosy as required.
The aga, the other stove, the freezers and the food-cupboards are in a kitchen off the main body of the cellar, though the Other Cupboard is set into the wall near Carinthia's chaise. The Fancy Italian, Luigi to make us tea, Antonio the coffee-maker and Fritz the chocolatier spend much of their time loitering there, ready to rush to the aid of any Tart who may be feeling faint for lack of sustenance.
Another room off the main cellar, down a corridor behind a brown velvet curtain, contains the hot-tub and jacuzzi.
The trapeze from the top of the stairs is in place, with the trampoline below it for soft landings.
The On Sweet has been refurbished as always (and a fat lot of good that is!); the glitter-ball is turning gently and throwing flecks of light around the ceiling.
Outside, just in case we go on having Spring, the succession plunges are to be found, easily dived into from the swing on the Old Oak tree -- you don't have to, you can just swing if that's what you want to do, but Splosh! is available.
The apricot, chocolate, blue, blue dusky, fawn-and-white, pencilled, mallard, silver, trout, apricot trout, black and of course white Indian Runner Ducks have come through the winter sheltering in their Duck Palace, and are now happily trundling about as only ducks can, saying "Duck" to each other.
The Silkie hens, one each of the non-standard colours (a red bearded silkie, and a partridge silkie, and a cuckoo silkie, and a bearded splash silkie, and a buff silkie, and a chocolate silkie, and a black silkie, and a white bearded silkie, and a golden silkie, and a blue silkie) are observing the Silkie cockerel in what seems to be a thoughtful way, insofar as hens look thoughtful.
It all seems like a good excuse to get quietly slarmy.
(08) . . . to huddle in the Cellar [started 2014-02-12]
Chris Ghoti's Intro to this Cellar:
This is a Storm Cellar, for taking refuge in as the Wintery Blasts ravage the countryside, and carp and dace look smug and start to mutter about annexing Nettlebed.
The usual crew of helpers (Darrington the butler, Ewbank, Honoré FitzMichael the pantler, The Page Three Pages, The Underfoot Men, the re-upholstering lady Gwyneth and her team of seamstresses, the Fancy Italian, Luigi to make us tea, Antonio the coffee-maker and Fritz the chocolatier) are all ready to do whatever is needed to make everyone comfortable.
We have lots of food stored in cupboards round the walls and in the kitchen against emergencies, and even more drink. We have a log fire blazing in a huge hearth which has a spit for cooking (though we also have an Aga and an ordinary stove) and beside it there are hanging toasting forks suitable for marshmallows as well as bread, and a shovel for roasting chestnuts.
There is also the Other Cupboard, which is near Carinthia's chaise. There are bar games about the room, and a piano, and there is a dance floor. The glitter-ball turns, throwing the lights back against the walls.
Most importantly there are plenty of comfortable chaises for relaxing on, all of them through some strange magic of the premises being close to the fire. These can be upholstered in any colour you like. There are also plenty of warm shawls to wrap about yourself, shoulders or feet as you prefer, kept in a kist near the fire. Oh, the decor? This cellar is painted in every colour of the rainbow, as a defiance against the dull and dreary days of winter, and against the wind and the rain, ice and snow.
I don't know what Carinthia might do about a kissing-bough, given the colours, nor yet Rosy about a garland, but I do hope that they will...
Just in case of Mad Irish Tarts there is a trapeze... And for the Dunnock there is a fully-feathered On Sweet.
"Never say no to a Medicinal" is inscribed above the fireplace, and illuminated by a dozen tiny LED spotlights so that you can't miss it.
(07) . . . to ramp about in the Cellar [started 2013-12-31]
Chris Ghoti's Intro to this Cellar:
This, the 52nd cellar which has been dug for us, our seventh in Peet's, has Never say no to a Medicinal written above the fireplace.
The basic colours are cream walls, burgundy woodwork and gold highlights, with the designs of court cards from the pack used in Alice placed randomly about the rooms.
There is a large fireplace with a kist full of warm shawls beside it and inglenook shelves for mulled wine and punch to sit on; it has a spit in case anyone wants to use it, as well as toasting forks for making toast (well, duh) but also for marshmallows, and a shovel for roasting chestnuts. The Other Cupboard is set into the wall nearby.
Most cookery takes place over in the large alcove with the Aga and the other stove and the microwave in it, also plenty of work-surfaces and a couple of food freezers and fridges. That is where the food-cupboards live, too. (The ice-maker is with the drinks cabinets.)
There is the usual trapeze for those who CBA with the stairs, and a trampoline for safe landing.
The On Sweet has been refurbished for the umpteenth time...
The hot-tub and jacuzzi are in their usual places along the corridor behind the brown velvet curtains.
There is a dance floor and a grand piano. There are also all the usual pub-games, and many packs of cards and board-games in yet another cupboard, this one free-standing over by the brown velvet curtains. Darrington the butler, Ewbank, Honoré FitzMichael the pantler, the Page Three Pages, the Underfoot Men and the re- upholstering lady Gwyneth and her team of seamstresses are all to hand to cater to our every whim, as are the Fancy Italian, Luigi to make us tea, Antonio the coffee-maker and Fritz the chocolatier.
Carinthia has arranged for the kissing-bough, and I hope Cider Rosy may make us a garland.
(06) . . . to recover in the Cellar [started 2013-11-18]
Chris Ghoti's Intro to this Cellar:
It's been a long time, but I have finally got my act together and spoken with the diggers-of-holes and their friends who give them good ale to help the job along, and there is a new cellar to replace the twice-the-usual- length one we have been shovelling empties out of for some time.
I blame the local council's new recycling system; it has put the whole business out of kilter.
Anyhow, I have been lucky enough to be able to persuade the owner of a set of copies of the Unicorn Tapestries to let us use them (don't ask; he became reasonable after a while) so those are on the walls, which have been painted white to show them off. In deference to the weather, the floor is covered in rugs of many sorts including sheepskin ones (very soft and pleasant to lie on in front of the fire so long as nobody is cooking at it) and some with patterns and in the glowing colours the proper Indian rug does so well.
It's definitely become cold in the evenings now, and the new cellar has a large fireplace with a large fire in it and a spit, and also shelves to either side for mulled wine or punch to keep warm. On the wall there are hanging forks for toasting bread or marshmallows; the shovel for roasting chestnuts is to the side as well. The kist full of shawls is near the fire keeping warm.
In the kitchen there is the Aga and the other stove and the freezers; the food cupboards are in there, but the Other Cupboard is in the wall near the fireplace in the main room.
The hot-tub and jacuzzi are as usual at the end of the corridor past the velvet curtain.
There is a grand piano and a dance floor, though they hardly see any use these days.
The On Sweet has a new metal mirror, and it's been re-feathered with the softest down. The glitter-ball is in its place. The other thing hanging in the cellar is the trapeze, because if she doesn't have a trapeze Twellys kicks up a rumpus, but so help me if there is any eating or more particularly drinking on it there will be Trouble. There is a trampoline for landing on from the trapeze as usual.
Cider Rosy, do you feel like making a garland?
And Carinthia, a kissing bough? The staff are glad to have a new cellar to fettle; Darrington the butler was beginning to look more than usually wooden, and Ewbank positively sulky. Honoré FitzMichael the pantler is glad to have a new kitchen, he tells me, and Fritz the chocolatier is in agreement; the Page Three Pages and Underfoot Men have been stirred into fresh action by the new decoration.
Gwyneth and her team of seamstresses will re-upholster any chaise which has begun to bore its occupant, or simply to match what is around us. Tapestry may take a little longer.
For those who want non-alcoholic drinks there is the Fancy Italian, there is Luigi to make us tea, and there is Antonio the coffee-maker.
Out of doors there are indoor pens for all the livestock to take refuge in when it is cold, though they still seem to be enjoying being out on the grass during the day at the moment.
(Anyone who is interested can have a look at the tapesteries here.)
(05) . . . to party in the Cellar [started 2013-08-23]
Chris Ghoti's Intro to this Cellar
Here it is: the fifth cellar at Peet's, the fiftieth cellar altogether.
Decorated in gold leaf and paint, with black and with deep red and with white just to set off the gold, and with gold balloons and golden bunting about the place as The Boys have seen fit (thanks, lads!) it is a wondrous and glistening sight. Or should that be site? No matter. Gwyneth and the upholstering team have made covers for all the chaises in this cellar out of matching cloth-of-gold, only soft so they are comfortable to sit on.
The cooking facilities are in another room, off towards the hot tub, jacuzzi and pool at the end of the corridor past the velvet curtain; there are fridges and a freezer in the cellar proper, where although there is a fireplace there is no fire, just a vase of brilliantly-coloured red, yellow and orange roses occupying the space where a fire might be.
There is a trapeze, and a trampoline, and all the usual pub games; there is a piano, and a dance floor.
Outside there are is a gazebo with soft loungers in it, and of course the succession plunges and the swing on the Old Oak Tree. The croquet lawn is available.
What the goats make of it all I don't know, but they have been given golden bows round their necks, as have the various hens and ducks, because I want to see whether they will co-operate enough to eat each other's or whether they will go on forever in a futile attempt to eat their own. The hens don't seem to mind, the ducks will get rid of theirs in the water. The livestock too have a gazebo, if they choose to accept it. (It is not perilous, though it may be in peril.)
Darrington and Ewbank and all the Page Three Pages and Underfoot Men are at your beck and call, even outside on the lawns and in the pools.
We are just past the three-year mark in the cellar, and this is the fiftieth cellar, and if anyone needs any more excuse than that for a party, I am very surprised.
(04) . . . to estivate in the Cellar [started 2013-07-11]
Chris Ghoti's Intro to this Cellar:
This is the I forget how manyeth cellar (I know that Feral Techie has been keeping notes and will be able to tell me, if BG hasn't and doesn't which seems unlikely) and I am back from Furrin Parts just in time to get it opened.
In Finland they are very good at cellars. They have whole underground shopping-malls in Helsinki. So I borrowed the Finnish flag as the theme for this one, which is also good because blue and white are nice cool colours and at the moment we need all the coolth we can get.
The fire has been allowed to go out, and there is no need for toasting forks or shawls as far as I can tell!
Outdoors there are the succession pools and the swing from the Old Oak Tree and the croquet lawn is being kept as smooth as silk; indoors there is ice a-plenty and a freezer full of ice-creams and sorbets and frozen yoghurt. There is various cool drink available.
The ducks are happy in their pond, but I think the hens are wilting a little in the heat, and the goats are clearly spending at least some of their time casting about for someone to blame for the weather.
All the usual people are on hand to give us help where needed: the Page Three Pages have been carefully trained in the use of a fan, and there is a punka set up by the fireplace to cause a cooling draft through the cellar.
I think I shall go and sit up to my neck in one of the cooler succession-pools.
(03) . . . to reticulate the Cellar? [started 2013-05-27]
Chris Ghoti's Intro to this Cellar:
Moving time has come once more, slightly delayed by a BT outage which meant the new cellar has been caught in the aether for several hours and is probably rather full of Oxygen.
This cellar is in all the blues and greens of spring (which seems finally to have arrived at least in some parts of the country), and has white paintwork and occasional small sparkles of gold.
There is a trampoline for landing on, if you have taken the trapeze-route from the top of the stairs, and the trapeze is there to silence the Irish one who otherwise kicks up a shindy about its absence. For the benefit of Small Birds the On Sweet has been re-feathered, and the mirror has been replaced for the umpteenth time. This is for the times when said bird is not cozying up to the trapeze in hopes of Gin.
Because I still don't trust the weather the fire and fireplace will remain available, and the warm wraps in the kist beside it are still there; likewise the punchbowl and the mulled wine cauldron. I've hung onto the forks for toasting sausages or bread or marshmallows, and the spit, as well as the aga and the other stove. By this means I hope to convince the weather that if it is fine it will be terribly inconvenient, and thus persuade it to be fine just to spite me. The hot-tub and jacuzzi are in their proper places, for the same reason, though the succession-pools outside have been cleared of any left-over leaves of the autumn, and people who really want to can swim in them, possibly having jumped in using the swing on the Old Oak Tree.
Inside the cellar there are plenty of pub games to play if the weather doesn't play properly. What's more, on one side of the Cellar proper there is a billiard table, and on the other the grand piano is newly tuned after its move and there is a dance floor just in case.
The freezers are full of good things, and so are the food-cupboards; the Other Cupboard is as it ought to be.
Darrington the butler and his assistant Ewbank are on duty, the Page Three Pages and the Underfoot Men are all over the place looking helpful, Honoré FitzMichael the pantler is pantling (I think that was what he claimed), Fritz the chocolatier is muttering about eclairs for some reason, Luigi is there to make us tea, Antonio to make us coffee, and the Fancy Italian is still hanging around just in case.
Gwyneth and her team of seamstresses are eager to re-upholster everyone's chaises to coordinate them with the colour scheme.
The ducks and the drake and the hens seem to feel that Spring has Sprung, though I am glad to say that none of the little boids is on de wing, and the goats are around being generally Wicked and looking about them with their wonderful evil yellow eyes for that which they may devour. In spite of their uncooperative nature there is still milk, anyhow. Of course the eggs for omelettes are in plentiful supply too.
Let's party!
Grateful thanks to the Fishly-Dunnocks for providing the previously missing introductory texts for Cellars (01) & (02)
(02) . . . to ramify the Cellar? [started 2013-04-11]
Chris Ghoti's Intro to this Cellar:
Yes, it's time to move again. The new cellar has therefore been dug, and is decorated in flame colours -- reds, oranges and bright yellows -- to try to encourage the season to get a bloody move on and get stuck in and warm up a bit. Carinthia is organising the Kissing Bough, and Twellies is going to add ribbons to the trapeze. ( These will sparkle when the light from the glitter-ball hits them.) Speaking of which there is also a trampoline for landing on, if you have taken the trapeze-route from the top of the stairs.
Because of the weather the fire will still be kept going, and the warm wraps in the kist beside it are still there; likewise the punchbowl and the mulled wine cauldron. There will be forks for toasting sausages or bread or marshmallows, and a spit, as well as the Aga and the other stove for more, or possibly less, traditional cooking. The freezers are full of good things, and so are the food-cupboards.
The other cupboard is as it ought to be.
The grand piano is newly tuned, and there is a dance floor just in case.
The hot-tub and the jacuzzi are in their proper places, and there are various pub-games to play: the shove-ha'penny board, the dominoes and the Nine Man Morris table are there as they should be, and there is a billiard table with the astrolabe under it.
The On Sweet has a re-repaired metal mirror, yet again, and has been re-feathered.
The staff are ready and waiting to welcome all and sundry: Darrington the butler and his accomplice I mean sorry assistant Ewbank are on duty, the Page Three Pages and the Underfoot Men are just waiting to run about at people's behests, and the specialist staff are hoping to be of use: the re-upholstering lady Gwyneth and her team of seamstresses are on hand in case chaises need to fit in with the colour scheme. Meanwhile Honoré FitzMichael the pantler is in his pantry, conspiring with Fritz the chocolatier and contemplating ever-more fancy cakes, while Luigi is there to make us tea, Antonio to make us coffee, and the Fancy Italian to hang around just for old times' sake.
Outside, the ducks and drake and the hens are all still taking refuge in the extensive porch at night, and the goats seem to be out there somewhere... There is milk,.and there are eggs, anyhow.
Right, let's get going....
(01) . . . to relocate the Cellar? [started 2013-02-25]
Chris Ghoti's Intro to this Cellar:
(In the interests of warding off the Grammar Police, if any, I must explain that all 45 cellars in the BBC board started "So comma who wants to help" and I think it might be bad luck to change it now.)
This is our first cellar in a strange place, and thanks go to Peet for being prepared to put up with the excavation and the associated landscaping!
There is a trapeze at the top of the steps for those who wish to miss out the boring climb down, and a trampoline at the other end of its swing for an exciting landing.
The decor for this first cellar here is primrose, spring green and bluebell blue, to encourage it to be a bit less Winter's Blast (or blast winter) outside. After all, the hens and the ducks and the goats would prefer not to be freezing all the time! Cider Rosy has promised a garland and Carinthia says she will make us a kissing-bough.
The re-upholstering lady Gwyneth and her team of seamstresses are on hand to alter any chaises to suit people's moods; just speak the word.
The other things in the cellar are much as they ever were: the stove and the Aga, the fireplace with toasting forks for toaast and marshmallows and shovel for roasting chestnuts, with inglenook where the mulled wine can be set and the punch kept hot, a furry rug in front of it for lounging in real heat, and a large kist near it with shawls and rugs for keeping the legs warm with.
The freezers and food cupboards are in the Pantler's domain: Honoré FitzMichael is in charge of provisioning. Darrington seems to have found employment elsewhere, so we shall be looking out for a new bulter; I have my eye on a man who has been a porter at Trinity College Oxford and is seeking new employment. Ewbank hasn't yet made any statement about whether he wishes to join us here. There are plenty of Page Three Pages and Underfoot Men to fetch and carry and to come and go.
We do seem still to have the Fancy Italian, Luigi to make us tea, Antonio the coffee-maker and Fritz the chocolatier.
The other cupboard is there as it should be, and is in Carinthia's charge.
The hot-tub and jacuzzi at the end of the corridor past the velvet curtain. There are the various pub-games: the shove-ha'penny board, the dominoes and the Nine Man Morris table are there, and the the billiard table with its own lighting is just round the corner from the main cellar.
The astrolabe is on the grand piano, naturally. And there is a dance-floor...
The hedge-sparrow's On Sweet has a re-repaired metal mirror... and has been re-feathered yet again.
The glitter-ball is turning gently and throwing flecks of light around the ceiling.
Oh: that poultry. The Indian Runner Ducks (and one drake) are runner-duck breed-colours: apricot, chocolate, blue, blue dusky, fawn-and-white, pencilled, mallard, silver, trout, apricot trout, black and of course white.
The Silkie hens are one hen of each colour: one of the non-standard ones, a red bearded silkie, and a partridge silkie, and a cuckoo silkie, and a bearded splash silkie, and a buff silkie, and a chocolate silkie, and a black silkie, and a white bearded silkie, and a golden silkie, and a blue silkie makes eleven, and we have eleven ducks and one drake so that ought to be Enough.
About the goats I deliberately know nothing.
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