Description
90 minutes
Embedded Files
Critical to connecting with your Little and building an intentional and inclusive relationship is understanding the rich diversity they bring to the table. Learning about each other’s background, heritage, talents, and skills, which make up your identities, supports this vision. This activity encourages Bigs and Littles to share experiences relating to their identity and to learn about each other’s identities. You can download the full activity HERE.
Module 1_Identity Wheel.pdfInstructions
1. Prepare to engage in the activity.
Establish that this activity will provide an opportunity to get to know each other better. Before delving into the activity, it is important to set the tone for an engaging interactive experience and healthy discussion.
2. Share some things about yourselves before diving in.
To ease into the conversation, start by sharing what’s unique about your names, using these prompts:
Tell your Big/Little about your name. If you know the meaning, you can share it.
Do others in your family share your name? Were you named after anyone? Who?
How were you named? Who named you?
How is your name unique?
3. Create your Identity Wheels.
Each of you will fill in an identity wheel. Write your name in the center, then fill in each piece of the wheel with a dimension of your identity that you consider to be important in defining who you are. As a Big, you can model this by filling in and sharing your responses for a few of the pieces. If stuck, refer to the list of potential identities to consider. You may also encourage your Little to get creative with their wheels (e.g., use color, draw, cut out pictures).
4. Play two truths and a lie to share what's on your wheels.
You and your Little will take turns sharing two truths from your wheels and one lie about your identity. After one person shares, the other guesses which statements are true and which was the lie. At the end of each round, share more about the truths you told about your identities, and let the guesser share their reasoning for their guess.
5. Reflect on the activity together.
Consider these prompts:
a) Which parts of our identities were obvious and easy to recognize in each other? Which parts were less obvious?
b) How do you think the different aspects of your identity affect how you build relationships with other people?
c) Did you learn new things about each other? How did it feel to find out these new things?
d) What was it like when the guesser guessed incorrectly? What can we do to make sure we’re seeing each other for who we really are?
Mentor Reflection
The Identity Wheel Activity encourages you to reflect with your Little about the layers of your shared and different identities and how those identities are more or less keenly felt, depending on the social context. Doing this activity can reveal how privilege may operate, sensitize you to the challenges your Little faces based on their identity, and encourages empathy. These are critical to supporting your Little on their journey. In reflection:
What are some of the notable similarities between you and your Little? In what ways do you feel closer to your Little now that you’ve shared more about your identities?
What are some of the notable differences between you and your Little? As you reflect on these differences, what feelings come up for you?
Tips
This activity works best in a context that allows space for pairs to have conversations without getting distracted.
This activity builds on the foundation of trust and asks for a high level of vulnerability from both Bigs and Littles. Listen with empathy to demonstrate that your Little’s experience matters to you.
Consider whether you and your Little are ready to engage in this activity or whether there are activities to build your relationship that should come first.
Let your Little know that if they’re not comfortable talking about some aspect of their wheel, they don’t have to share and that’s okay.
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