Local Food Establishments Cower Before Judgment of Sterling Green
I believe that all of the local food establishments around here are somewhat mediocre, to an extent. Now there are a few diamonds in the rough around Ellsworth but you really got to look for them. For my first review column for the beginning of the year, you should expect some hot takes as I berate your favorite food establishments. I will mainly be focusing on the food quality obviously but also the staff, cleaniness, and general reputation of the restaurant before I judge.
Pat's Pizza 4/10
I am starting off with a very hot take apparently, I really do not understand why because the food is okay at best. I do not enjoy the pizza here, it is quite underwhelming in most cases I have visited. When you have Pizza in the name, you should expect the pizza to be the icon of the restaurant. I shouldn't expect a waterfall of grease to flow down the pizza like a coursing river, however this is the case with their pizza. I hate their pizza, the subs are fine, but the wings are perfect. Anytime I have the misfortune of attending this establishment, I usually get the wings.
Shinbashi 1.1/10
This is the worst restaurant in the city without a doubt. I am not fabricating this by any means but there has been hair in my food every single time I've had the disprivilege of eating at this cursed establishment. From what I know, cleanliness is the most important aspect of running a restaurant, after it occurs three separate times, it is simply not acceptable and somewhat inappropriate to the customer. The staff is very nice and accommodating, this is however the only positive thing I can say. The food is very under par and serves the finest microwave quality dishes. They use an absurd amount of vegetables as garnish where it succumbs to the level of wasting food. I tell you, your patronage should not be with Shinbashi.
Crazy Sumo 7.5/10
I believe this is the newest restaurant to hit the scene on the landscape of Ellsworth, and it definitely has made the biggest impact. If you are not familiar with hibachi, the chef basically cooks in front of the party and does fancy tricks while making an unbelievably good course meal. Prior to Crazy Sumo, the closest hibachi restaurant was in Bangor, so it is nice to have something on hometurf. I've had hibachi back in Virginia, the experience is basically the same between the two. Food quality is great and worth the price tag in most cases.
86 This - 8.6/10
86 This wins the title of having the coolest name of all the restaurants in Ellsworth. I've never been to a Chipotle but I imagine that 86 and Chipotle are basically the same. Depending on how busy they are, staff can get your food out in a couple minutes or roughly thirty give or take. The burritos have a consistent quality and taste pretty good, most fit for someone needing lunch on the go. They do have a pickup service so you can order online, visit 86, grab your food and go. You typically do not see such services among other locals so I am impressed they can operate it in such a fine tuned manner.
Helen's - 4/10
I do not like Helen's. There are elderly people all over the place. The food tastes like paste. Presentation is poor. The staff however are very cool. Overall... mildly disappointed.
Casa Jalisco - 8/10
Casa Jalisco, like Crazy Sumo, is one of the newer restaurants to hit the scene. Personally I am a big fan, the prices are affordable, the food is pretty good, but I am skeptical of how fast they serve the food. They can serve a table of four in roughly ten minutes after ordering, and it tastes like the meat just came off the grill. One of my biggest icks when it comes to catering is food waste as previously mentioned in Shinbashi, but the portion sizes are perfect. You will usually be able to finish the entire plate with no problem.
Provender Kitchen and Bar - 9.5/10
Provender's has the best food in Ellsworth by a mile. If you want to eat like a king, this is the place. However, the prices are also fit for a king as well. I've visited this bistro twice, and left more than satisfied both times. Their menu is constantly changing with unique dishes and very bizarre ones like octopus and squid. It was here that I received the greatest dish I have ever had the privilege of consuming. It was this lamb dish but the meat was soaked in this raspberry marmalade, and there were these potatoes with nuts or some kind of garnish that were unfathomably good. It felt like I was eating a cloud. It is legitimately the best dish I have ever eaten. I don't think they sell it anymore because they rotate their menu but if they ever brought that lamb back, I'd basically stop in every night.