Dating Violence Prevention/Intervention
Violence Prevention/Intervention
Dating Violence Intervention
Teen Dating Violence RED FLAGS
Shoves, slaps, chokes, hits, or uses weapons against me
Constantly checks up on me or makes me check in
Texts or calls me excessively
Has frequent mood swings: Is angry one minute and the next minute is sweet and apologetic
Puts me down, calls me names, or criticizes me
Breaks things or throws things to intimidate me
Yells, screams, or humiliates me in front of others
Threatens to hurt him/herself because of me
Makes me feel nervous or like I'm walking on eggshells
Forces me into proving my love or loyalty constantly
Pressures me into having sex
If a teen answers "YES" to any of these questions, they may be in an abusive relationship. - Hope's Door, Texas Advocacy Project
Sexual Victimization
Relationship Violence Statistics
1 in 4 women, 1 in 9 men in United States are victims of domestic violence at some point in their lives.1
On the average, more than three women are murdered by their husbands or boyfriends every day.2
3 out of 4 respondents personally know someone who is or has been a victim of domestic violence.3
1 in 5 female high school students reports being physically and/or sexually abused by a dating partner. Abused girls are significantly more likely to get involved in other risky behaviors. They are 4 to 6 times more likely to get pregnant and 8 to 9 times more likely to have tried to commit suicide.4
Violence against women costs companies $72.8 million annually due to lost productivity.5
Sexual Assault Statistics
Nearly 1 in 4 women may experience sexual violence by an intimate partner in their lifetime.6
According to the U.S. Department of Justice's National Crime Victimization Survey -- there were 248,300 sexual assaults in 2007 (the most recent data available).7
15% of sexual assault and rape victims are under age 12.8
20% to 25% of women in college reported experiencing an attempted or a completed rape in college.9
13.3% of college women indicated that they had been forced to have sex in a dating situation.10
Before You Text- Sexting Prevention Course
Texas Penal Code-Sexual Assault
Hunt County Children's Advocacy Resources
http://www.apa.org/pi/families/resources/love-teens.pdf
Not Along-Together Against Sexual Assault
A LETTER TO PARENTS ON TEEN DATING ABUSE FROM PEDIATRICIAN & EXPERT, DR. ELIZABETH MILLER
Dear Parents/Guardians/Educators,
As a physician who specializes in care for adolescents, a researcher on teen dating abuse, and a parent of a teen, I am often asked by other parents to talk about the warning signs of dating abuse, what parents should be looking for, and how they can help their child navigate out of an unhealthy relationship. Unfortunately, there are no easy answers to these questions.
A COMMON CHARACTERISTIC
A common characteristic of unhealthy and abusive relationships is the control that the abusive partner seeks to maintain in the relationship. This includes telling someone what to wear, where they can go, who they can hang out with, calling them names, humiliating them in front of others. Over time, the isolation from one's social network increases, as the abuser insists on spending time "just the two of us," and threatens to leave or cause harm if things do not go the way they want, "You must not love me." Creating this isolation and dissolution of one's social supports (loss of friends, disconnectedness from family) are hallmarks of controlling behaviors. In addition, abusers often monitor cell phones and emails, and for example, may threaten harm if the response to a text message is not instant. Parents are rarely aware of such controlling tactics as these occur insidiously over time, and an adolescent may themselves not recognize the controlling, possessive behaviors as unhealthy. "They must love me because they just want to spend time with me."
WARNING SIGNS
While the following non-specific warning signs could indicate other concerning things such as depression or drug use, these should also raise a red flag for parents and adult caregivers about the possibility of an unhealthy relationship:
* no longer hanging out with his/her circle of friends
* wearing the same clothing
* distracted when spoken to
* constantly checking cell phone, gets extremely upset when asked to turn phone off
* withdrawn, quieter than usual
* angry, irritable when asked how they are doing
* making excuses for their boyfriend/girlfriend
* showering immediately after getting home
* unexplained scratches or bruises
Sexual coercion and violence are also not uncommon in teen dating abuse. Again, because of the emotional abuse and control, victims of sexual violence may be convinced that they are to blame for what has happened. "You'd do this if you loved me" or "If you don't have sex with me, I'll leave you" are common examples of sexual coercion. In some instances, girls in abusive relationships describe how their partners actively tried to get them pregnant. Rarely do teens disclose such sexual abuse to their parents as they may feel shameful, guilty, and scared. Parents need to be aware of the possibility of sexual abuse, and to ensure that they communicate with their child that they are never to blame if someone tries to make them do things sexually that they don't want to do. And certainly, that no one ever has the right to put their hands on them, period. The physical and sexual violence can escalate quickly in these unhealthy relationships where the abusive partner has significant control over the other.
ADVICE FOR PARENTS
Perhaps the best advice for parents is to start talking about what constitutes a healthy, respectful relationship early on with your child. Sharing the warning signs of teen dating abuse with your child and saying, "If you know someone who's experiencing something like this, let's talk about it, let's talk about how you can be a good friend and help them stay safe." Please assure your child that they are not to blame for an unhealthy relationship, and that you are available to help them be safe and happy. Please avail yourself of the many good resources available on teen dating abuse for youth and adults.
Peace,
Elizabeth Miller, MD, PhD
Chief of Adolescent Medicine, Children's Hospital of Pittsburgh
Love Is Not Abuse Coalition Member for Pennsylvania
http://loveisnotabuse.com/web/guest/home
Break the Cycle-Dating Violence
http://www.breakthecycle.org/dating-violence-101?gclid=CPqLmLLSzrICFcaiPAodfFEAxg
http://www.justthinktwice.com/