Beneath the Surface

So who am I really?

My name is Jamaya Johnson but people usually refer to me as Maya, a nickname that I've had since I was a child. I've always been creative in many different facets, I grew up wanting to be an author and then a designer, and then an artist, and then an author again, but as I got older I learned that authors didn't make any money so I quickly realized that passion wasn't all that feasible. It wasn't until I took an AP Psychology class in my second year of high school that I found my first adult passion.

Like all people that want to go into psychology at first, I wanted to become a therapist. With age, I have learned that the only therapy I'm willing to do is family and relationship therapy, but that's a completely different story that would take up too much space on this webpage. 

After taking a social psychology class at NC State I have learned that I have a lot of questions about our brain and why we behave the way we do with each other as a society, after all, the human experience would be nothing if it weren't for human interaction. That was when I discovered that I wanted social psychology to be the discipline I go into. 

The only problem is that when I was admitted to NC State I was admitted as a sociology major.

For two and a half years of my college experience whenever people asked me what my major was, I brazenly told them "psychology" because I refused to leave this university without a psychology degree. It wasn't easy to switch my major either, NC State's psychology department is competitive and after I filled out the major change form the first time I was denied. It was a mixture of my GPA being a bit low because my first semester I had a lot of trouble adjusting to college life, and also because I hadn't completed all of the preferred classes. The next two semesters I dug my heels in. I pulled my GPA up by .5 and completed the psychology classes that I needed to transfer as a preferred student. In the spring semester of 2023, I officially became a psychology student. 

This major and the discipline I want to go into sing to me. I excitedly recap all that I've learned to everyone I can. My parents who have no idea what I talk about, but that love it anyway because they can feel the passion I have. My roommate who understands my passion and engages in my conversation, because she too is a humanities major, My boyfriend who listens to me babble every day about potential research questions, what I've learned in my abnormal psychology class, and epiphanies I have, all while being patient with me, even though I psychoanalyze him whenever I'm bored. 

Although psychology is my first adult passion in my freshman year of college, tattooing became my second. 

At first, I started with stick and poke tattoos, a Reddit account I found out of the blue becoming my bible. I freehanded a lot of the stick and poke tattoos I have, not because of my artistic ability but because I didn't have a thermal copy machine and I didn't know how to make stencils at that point. I went home and proudly showed off my tattoos to my mom who asked me the question that everyone does when I tell them that I learned to tattoo myself: 

"Are they real?!" 

And of course the answer I gave her with a happy grin, just like I give everyone else:

"Yes!" 

My father bought me my first tattoo machine for Christmas, after realizing how serious I was about tattooing. At that point, I had a fourth of my left arm sleeve and I talked about it so much that he decided to invest in me. His only requirement was that I gave him a tattoo before I use it on myself. When my machine came in the mail we sat in the kitchen as I unpackaged it with sparkles in my eyes. His response? "all right I want my tattoo now." I explained to my dad that I had no idea how to use the machine and he didn't mind. That day I gave my dad a freehand tattoo in our kitchen. He bragged up and down to everyone he could about his amazing tattoo and wears it with pride every day. Before I went back to school he asked me for another tattoo, he wanted one that matched mine. I was a bit hesitant about it, telling him that my tattoo was a 1 of 1, but he didn't care, he wanted the tattoo still. I now have a matching tattoo with my dad. 

I still love tattooing and I have half a tattoo sleeve and a full leg of self-done tattoos to prove that, but I had to decide between an apprenticeship and graduate school when I graduate and I have chosen graduate school. Once I finish my Ph.D. and work in my field for a few years I will take up tattooing again and get an apprenticeship and learn how to do it the correct way. Until then I'll work on my art skills and put a pin in this passion for the time being. 

Thank you for allowing me to share my passions and my story with you!

I feel like we often times get caught up in keeping appearances and appearing professional so much that the authenticity of our character gets lost in translation. We all have individual stories that make us different from each other and that gives us our sparkle. This is only a fraction of the story of my life but these moments have made me who I am while also showcasing what my personality is like in the real world, not just on paper.