Calm Your Body

Slowing down our breathing and taking deep breaths is one of the most powerful tools we have for calming down. It helps our muscles relax and it helps to turn back on the parts of the brain that power down when we get upset. This, in turn, allows us to express ourselves better and to make better decisions.

It's common to use videos (like the ones below), pictures, and other tools to help us breathe deeply. However, it's important to practice often enough that you have a breathing routine you can jump into by yourself when you need it.

If your stress is building up fast, all you might have time to do is to quickly stretch your neck and shoulders or clench and unclench your fists while you take a few deep breaths.

If you have more time available, find an appropriate place to practice "progressive muscle relaxation," which means tensing and relaxing different groups of muscles, one at a time. This helps you to relax your body and also makes upset feelings less intense.

When you're at school, you can ask an adult for permission to pace in your classroom or in the hallway. At home, you can pace back and forth in your room or even take a walk outside. Walking helps to calm your body, but a lot of people say that it also helps them calm their thoughts by "clearing their head."

Humans have what's called the mammalian diving response: a reflex that "flicks on" when we're submerged in cold water or even do something as simple as splash our faces with water. When this happens, our heart rates automatically slow down and we breathe more deeply. This helps us to calm down. It's similar to the goal of things like deep breathing, but taking advantage of the diving response by splashing your face with water can kick-start and speed up the process.

Hand fidgets and other sensory tools can be a helpful calming tool — as long as they don't distract us from other things we need to pay attention to. By engaging in a repetitive hand motion, we reconnect with our bodies, which often helps us to feel more calm. This is similar to what happens when we go for a walk, exercise, or even just take deep breaths.