“Mentoring is a relational experience in which one person empowers another by sharing God-given resources.” (P. Stanley and J.R. Clinton, Connecting: The Mentoring Relationships You Need to Succeed in Life, 1992, p. 38) 

Our God-given resources (talents, gifts, experiences) are many. And as you relate to people in your oikos, you can use these resources to empower others to grow in their relationship with Jesus and fulfill their God-given purposes.  

Growing in your ability to effectively mentor and develop people will make you invaluable, no matter your chosen vocation. We really believe that LeaderStep can help prepare you for leadership at any level and in any venue. LeaderStep helps equip you to take that which God has given you to empower others to become better disciples, become better people themselves. That is invaluable. People hire for that. People promote for that. People give you more influence because of that. If you develop the ability to invest yourself in people’s lives and empower them, then success and leadership will follow. 

Intensive Mentoring calls for deliberate and specific actions by both the mentor and mentee. 

The Discipler 

This is a relational process whereby the person who is more experienced in the things of God and the basics of the Christian life teaches, models, and trains the person who is less experienced. 

 Four basic areas of concern: 

• Devotions - regular times of meeting with God, prayer, worship 

• Word intake - how to read, memorize, meditate upon, and study Scripture 

• Relationships - the importance of fellowship and community 

• Ministry - spiritual gifts, evangelism, prayer, serving others 

Help people develop strong, sound Biblical habits. 

As with all Intensive mentoring relationships, males mentor males and females mentor females. 

Make sure you evaluate (and upgrade when necessary) your own devotional life, Word intake, relationships, roles and participation in ministry.

The Spiritual Guide 

This is a relational process in which a person facilitates the spiritual development of another at critical times in their life journey. The Spiritual Guide helps shape internal motivations, develops new understanding, and promotes one toward a new level of spiritual maturity.  

Focus on accountability in specific growth areas—marriage, finances, moral freedom, etc. 

The aim is to develop the inner person—who is he or she trying to become? 

• “Being-oriented” and focused on outcomes—becoming a godly husband, becoming content in your finances, becoming disciplined in lifestyle to achieve moral freedom, etc. 

• Deals with inner motivation and inner drives, perspectives and passions, and convictions and core values. 

This type of mentoring is usually issue- or need-focused. 

The Coach 

This is a relational process in which the mentor helps the mentee develop a new set of skills or increase the skill set he or she already possesses.

The Spiritual Guide is interested in “becoming” and is focused on outcomes and on imparting one life to another. The Coach is interested in “doing” and is focused on behaviors, in helping someone improve in or learn a skill. While the Spiritual Guide deals with inner drives and motivations, the Coach deals with skill sets. 

Spiritual Guide: embrace a Biblical philosophy of handling money, become other-centered (not selfish) in marriage. 

Coach: be able to create a budget, learn how to communicate with your spouse. 

A person needs mentoring from a Coach when they are faced with a task that is beyond their present capacity to handle.  (Key word = task.) Again, the focus is on “do,” not “be.” 

These models describe mentors who provide input into the life of another at appropriate times. 

The Counselor 

This is a person who God uses to give timely advice, impartial perspective, or specific guidance to another person. This mentoring relationship can be as brief as a divine contact or as long as a relationship with a trusted person from whom one seeks advice over a lifetime.

The Spiritual Guide deals with “being” and the Coach with “doing.” The Counselor deals with advice. 

Eight Major Empowerment Functions of a Counselor 

• Encouragement - affirms that the person is on the right track and can succeed on the road ahead—points out what God appears to be doing in the life of the mentee. 

• Sounding Board - provides a listening ear and offers feedback where it is requested or needed. 

• Major Evaluation - points out errors or pitfalls in thinking, process or behavior. 

• Perspective - offers fresh perspective on or insights into the situation at hand—relates the present micro situation to the big picture. 

• Specific Advice - provides input into the decision making process and offers alternative courses of action or thought. 

• Linking - connects the mentee with the resources necessary to meet the challenges ahead (people, information sources, finances, etc.).

• Major Guidance - clarifies options, relates the present circumstances to life stages and the bigger picture, and suggests possible courses of action to a mentee at a major turning point in their journey. 

• Inner Healing - helps people overcome internal hindrances to their progress in their life journey (usually a trained counselor). 

The Teacher 

This model of mentor is concerned with imparting knowledge, information, and understanding on a particular subject that is necessary to help the mentee along in his/her life journey. 

The Spiritual Guide deals with “being,” the Coach with  “doing,” and the Counselor with advice. The Teacher deals with information. 

This relationship can range from formal (as in a classroom) to very informal (Not every classroom teacher is a mentor to everyone in the class just because he/she is teaching the class.). 

As opposed to the Coach who focuses on “doing” (“How do I  do this?”), the Teacher focuses on imparting the information the mentee needs to take the next step or be more effective in their present life circumstances (“Where can I find out about…?” or “What do you know about…?”). 

The Sponsor 

This person is a connection-maker. They link their mentee to people in an organization or network in such a way as to provide opportunities to the mentee that he/she would not otherwise have had. 

 The Sponsor is a person who is “in” at a level that the mentee is not (influence, reputation, organizational knowledge,  recognition). The actions of the sponsor are designed to bring the mentee “in” (or at least to open the doors that lead “in”).  

Not every person who is “in” has the heart or desire to bring others “in”. Nor should it be expected that every person who is “in” act as a sponsor to just anyone. The Sponsor’s mentoring is a relationship of trust, because the Sponsor’s reputation is on the line, to some extent.  

Every organization needs those who serve as wise sponsors on behalf of the next generation of participants. Not only do they help the individuals they sponsor, but they help the organization develop at a faster rate. 

Sponsors can and should have some type of ongoing, organic  relationship with the mentee to guide them, as needed, in their journey within the organization or network—explaining unwritten rules, acquainting the mentee with past history, guiding them around certain organizational  pitfalls, interpreting policy, and providing other pertinent insights. 

A Note on Managing Expectations 

Learning to effectively manage expectations is crucial to effective Intensive and Occasional mentoring. Mentoring is a process. It involves learning what people want, what they really need, who you are, what you are able or willing to provide, what God’s wisdom is in all this. All these need on-going clarification and adjustments as you lead and mentor people. Learning how to do this well takes an on going dependence on God, as well as a good deal of hands-on learning experiences. 

Passive mentors may seem more like models than mentors, because the mentee has very little (if any) personal contact with them. However, these individuals are legitimate mentors because the life of the mentee is impacted by the mentor, even at a distance. 

The Contemporary Model 

This is a person whose work, ministry, writings, reputation, and character have elevated him/her in the eyes of the mentee, to the point where his/her life and work help shape those of the mentee.

The Contemporary model lives out the values that you—the mentee—hold dear. The Contemporary model may or may not know that he/she is serving as a model to you. Even if they do, they may make no attempt at a personal relationship. In this way, the Passive model differs from all other mentoring  styles. You follow them; they don’t lead you. 

Occasionally, a Contemporary model may feel prompted to reach out to a person they perceive as holding them in high esteem. When this happens, there is potential for a shift to a different type of mentoring relationship.  

Three key functions of a Contemporary model:  

1. Embody key values. 

2. Serve as a role model (model parent, leader, spouse, pastor, believer, etc.) 

3. Their lives serve as roadmaps for how to live out those values. 

The impact of the Contemporary model is three-fold: 

1. The mentee gains confidence in the veracity of their values. 

2. The mentee gains hope that they too can live out these values. 

3. The mentee is motivated by the example of the mentor.

The Historical Model

This is a person from Scripture or history who is deceased, yet continues to inspire the mentee through autobiographical or biographical writings, through his/her own written work, or through his/her contribution to the lives of others. They provide the same basic functions as the Contemporary model, though deceased.

• Which of the three Intensive models do you most identify with? Explain.

• Which of the models would you like to become better at? Why?

• How would you go about doing that?

• Which of the three Occasional models do you most identify with? Explain.

• Which of the models would you like to become better at? Why?

• How would you go about doing that?

• Which people in your life have had the most positive impact in the development of your character, talents, and abilities to influence people? Explain.

• Which historical figures or authors have had significant impact in your life? Explain.