Freshmen

These skills will help you improve academic skills, practice getting along with others, learn to manage your emotions, and develop problem-solving skills.

1. Empathy:

   • This is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. This includes:

     • Understanding someone else's perspective.

     • Using active listening during a conversation.

     • Not making assumptions about others.

     • Always being kind, we do not know what everyone is going through. A kind face could make their day!

2. Assertiveness:

   • This means being able to stand up for your own or other people's rights in a calm and positive way, without being either aggressive or passively accepting. How can we do this:

     • Use your empathy skills.

     • Use a clear, firm, calm voice.

     • Look at the person with a confident expression.

     • Keep your head up and shoulders back in a confident posture.

3. Emotional Management:

   • Emotions are completely normal and natural to have, but sometimes strong emotions might not fit the situation you are in. We need to practice understanding our emotions and practice coping skills to help calm down.

     • Notice: Recognizing your physical and mental signal, notice what caused you to have a strong emotion.

     • Pause. Use your signal, pick something you can tell yourself in your head that would get you know to calm down.

     • Think twice. Use your brain, before having your string emotion think about how it might impact you and others around you.

       • Try this to calm down:

         1. Doing something physically active

         2. Doing something relaxing

         3. Thinking about something else

         4. Using centered breathing

         5. Using positive self-talk

4. Coping Skills:

   • Centered breathing

     • Get into a comfortable seat or lay down.

     • Close your eyes and place your hand on your stomach.

     • Slowly breathe through your nose into the lower part of your lungs for 4 seconds.

     • Feel your stomach moving out when you breathe in.

     • Slowly breathe out through your mouth for 4 seconds.

       • Repeat 3 times, or until you feel relaxed.

   • Positive self-talk

     • This is when someone seeks to bring the positive out of the negative to help you do better, go further, or just keep moving forward.

     • Instead of "I cannot do this, I am not good at it" try "I am still learning, I can handle this, I get better every day!"

5. Problem-Solving Skills:

   • There are some important things to think about before solving a problem:

     • Can I actually do this?

       • Sometimes to solve a problem, we might need help from others. For example, if your frisbee ends up on top of the roof and your decision to solve this problem is to fly a helicopter to the roof get the frisbee... that sounds cool but might not be something you can actually do. Instead, ask a trusted adult to get a ladder and help you get your frisbee down.

     • Is it safe?

       • This relates to the first consideration, when solving a problem, think about the consequences before you act. Please keep yourself and others safe, your safety is the most important thing to consider.

     • How might people feel about it?

       • Considering others' feelings and perspectives is apart of our empathy skills. You want to try and make a decision to solve a problem that does not hurt someone else's feelings.

     • Is it ethical?

       • Ethical is something that is considered a good or right thing to do. For example, a white lie might seem harmless enough, but lying is not considered good or right to do. Think about the consequences, what is someone catches you in a white line, how would that make them feel?

6. Using the Action Plan: The ABCs to Problem Solving

   • A: Analyze the situation

     • Think really hard about every aspect of the situation.

   • B: Brainstorm options

     • Come up with a lot of different ideas, no idea is a bad idea!

   • C: Consider each option

     • Once you have your idea, thing about the consequences or outcomes of each one. Make a list of the pros and cons to each idea.

   • D: Decide on the best option

     • Look at your list of ideas and find the best one to solve the problem, then do it!

   • E: Evaluate if it works

     • Did that idea work, think about what happened after you tried that idea.

   • F: Figure out another way

     • Maybe your first idea did not work, that's okay! Try another one on your list until the problem is solved.

7. Working in a Group:

Working in a group can be fun because of all the different ideas and experiences other people have had that might be different for yourself. Our differences are what makes us unique! So how can we work together with people who have different ideas than we do? Try this:

7. • Empathy: Remember we do not always know what is going on in someone's life, your best bet is to always be kind and understanding.

   • Active listening: Involves the listener observing the speaker's behavior and body language. Having the ability to interpret a person's body language lets the listener develop a more accurate understanding of the speaker's message.

   • Considering others' perspectives: It is okay to not have the same ideas as someone else, but try to put yourself in the other person's shoes and think about why they feel differently from you on a subject.

   • Respond thoughtfully: Responding thoughtfully would mean you consider what the other person is saying and then carefully consider what you should say back. If you do not understand what the other person is trying to say, ask some follow up questions (this also shows you were listening!).