Malcom Lawther 1941 - 2023

Malcolm was born on 13th September, 1941, in Gosforth, near Newcastle, a community rooted to the east of the North Pennines. Son of a professional soldier, an engineer, Malcolm, with his mother Jane and elder brother Donald, moved house with every new military posting. And that brought them eventually south to Salisbury and then to Leatherhead. It was there, during Malcolm’s Senior School days that his father died.

Malcolm was clever: And so he went to Glyn Boys School, Ewell, where he relished sports - especially football and cricket. Team sport builds brotherhood, makes lasting friendships. His dad’s death left Malcolm with early financial responsibilities. But his earnings from his Saturday job - making meat deliveries by bicycle - would not stretch far. So he set aside thoughts of University, got on with things, and was quickly accepted as a trainee by Lloyds Bank.

And that was how he came to meet Jill Cattell - the young woman who was to become his best friend and later his wife. Jill, who lived in Torquay, had also chosen a career with Lloyds Bank. They met at a dance. Malcolm was nothing less than resourceful, and he hitch-hiked his way to Torquay and Jill as often he could - until, in 1965, they married, and made their first home in Hampton Wick. 

During Malcolm’s rise to become Head of Securities, Simon was born (1967), and not long afterwards Malcolm joined Lloyds Access Credit Card promotion team. He looked forward to his entry into High Street Branch Management, but in 1971, before that time arrived came another arrival, his second son, Neil. Short notice of that imminent event sent him hurtling through Roseberry Park at break-neck speed to the maternity ward at Epsom. A posting to Walton-on-Thames began his Branch Management tour of south London that included Wimbledon Common, Mitcham and of course Epsom Branch. It was the transfer to Epsom that brought the family to Station Avenue in West Ewell and subsequently Windmill Lane - where at the same time they acquired Lucy, their dog. And that was where my wife and I met them. We became next door neighbours.

Being the proud father of two energetic boys re-energised Malcolm’s sporting  interest. He got stuck-in, and in due course became responsible for the Epsom Eagles football club, youngsters of Simon’s age as well as taking on more in support of his sons’ enthusiasm for 2nd Ewell Cub and Scouting activities. His wider social commitments were developing at the same time, too: He was treasurer of the local CRUSE bereavement support organisation and, a regular Server here at Saint Mary’s and later on became the church warden: He ran the book stall at the annual Church Fair for around thirty years. Well, you know how it is; volunteers are often in short supply! And during some of that time, of course, he continued to support his widowed mum living out at Thames Ditton.

After his retirement from banking, he put his skills at the disposal of Wallace Fields First School, managed property financial arrangements, and undertook certain responsibilities for Epsom’s Conservative Association. He followed the fortunes of Newcastle, Wimbledon, Sutton United, and Leatherhead football clubs.  And whenever he could, he shunned the car, preferring his bicycle. That was a good move, I often thought. He was fit. And he and Jill travelled widely, visiting the boys, their daughters-in-law and grandchildren - seeing much of the world. You do it when you can - if you can - because sometimes later in life, infirmity sets in and memories become more than ever important.

And yet, in some ways perhaps his quietest and deepest passion - as time slipped by - was for his garden; in which he could lose himself. It was easier sometimes for Jill to coax him into the house at meal times by sounding a hand bell. Locating him amid his trees, his flowers, and his vegetables was not always easy!

Inexorably during our later years, our children and grandchildren, the young lives we love with such passion, begin to ‘leave us behind’. A father does not so much lose confidence as grow somewhat in awe and pride at his children’s achievements.  And so it was with Malcolm - who watched two paths with delight: The first as Simon immersed himself in Business Studies at Portsmouth, a road that led to Julie and took them to Thailand and then Australia, where they now live with their sons Freddie and Finley, and their daughter Tess; The second, as Neil pursued his facility for languages in Norwich, and then pursued Kristin to Norway where they built their family, creating Susanna and Christopher.

In our conversations over the fence we talked about this and that - and a lot about our children. But whatever was said was always kindly, even when we were cross. Malcolm was sound and thoughtful, and (maybe like most of us) shy and sensitive, too. For life - which is generally kind if you just get on with things - brings cuts and bruises, too. He was uncomplaining. Saw the good in most things; And was intensely fond of Jill, his boys, their wives, and his beautiful grandchildren. 

Obituary kindly written by Malcolm's long-time neighbour and friend, Robert Hughes

Footnote

Malcolm joined The Old Glynians’ Association, formerly Glyn Old Boys, upon leaving school. He was a member of the committee for many years and was Honorary Secretary from 2004 to 2013. He remained on the committee until failing health forced his resignation. He will be sorely missed by The Association.

Paul Skipp Hon. Sec (TOGA)