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Exposure to the News can Trigger Strong Feelings & Anxiety
Exposure to the News can Trigger Strong Feelings & Anxiety
Do your best to limit your children's exposure to the news. Even if you think that they are not listening, children are very perceptive and will pick up on the intensity of the newscaster's voice and the unfamiliar words like pandemic, number of positive cases and the mortality data. Often children do not fully understand the details, but they sense that people are scared. This can then lead to triggering fear and anxiety for the child.
Do your best to limit your children's exposure to the news. Even if you think that they are not listening, children are very perceptive and will pick up on the intensity of the newscaster's voice and the unfamiliar words like pandemic, number of positive cases and the mortality data. Often children do not fully understand the details, but they sense that people are scared. This can then lead to triggering fear and anxiety for the child.
Self Care for Parents
Self Care for Parents
As the saying goes, you need to put on your oxygen mask before you can assist your child. Same goes for supporting children's emotional health. There are lots of resources for self care under the student section of my website: relaxation, belly breathing, mindfulness and even some yoga. Check it Out & Take Care of Yourself!
As the saying goes, you need to put on your oxygen mask before you can assist your child. Same goes for supporting children's emotional health. There are lots of resources for self care under the student section of my website: relaxation, belly breathing, mindfulness and even some yoga. Check it Out & Take Care of Yourself!
During this unpredictable and uncertain times it is very important to establish a consistent routine for our children, and for ourselves. One way to do this is by creating a family charter, acknowledging our feelings by using the Mood Meter and regulating our emotions by using the Meta Moment. The students at Shorewood are very familiar with the RULER program. Give them a chance to share their knowledge with you. Below are some additional resources that may be helpful in bringing RULER into your home.
During this unpredictable and uncertain times it is very important to establish a consistent routine for our children, and for ourselves. One way to do this is by creating a family charter, acknowledging our feelings by using the Mood Meter and regulating our emotions by using the Meta Moment. The students at Shorewood are very familiar with the RULER program. Give them a chance to share their knowledge with you. Below are some additional resources that may be helpful in bringing RULER into your home.
Creating a Family Charter
Creating a Family Charter
- How do we want to feel as a family?
- What kind of behaviors do we need in order to feel that way?
- What will we do when a conflict comes up?
Click HERE E for a more detailed explanation of a Charter
Understanding the Mood Meter
Understanding the Mood Meter
The Mood Meter is a tool that provides a way for everyone in your family to share their feelings. To start:
The Mood Meter is a tool that provides a way for everyone in your family to share their feelings. To start:
- Ask your child where he/she is on the mood meter. Are they in the yellow, green, blue or red?
- Do they want to stay where they are on the mood meter or do they want to shift to a different color?
- If they want to shift to a different color/emotion, what strategy do they need to use?
By checking in daily with your family, you will have a sense of their emotional state and whether they need support during this difficult time.
By checking in daily with your family, you will have a sense of their emotional state and whether they need support during this difficult time.
Mood Meter Poster
Mood Meter Poster
Remember there are no "good" or "bad" feelings. Feelings can be seen on a continuum of pleasant to unpleasant and low energy to high energy.
Remember there are no "good" or "bad" feelings. Feelings can be seen on a continuum of pleasant to unpleasant and low energy to high energy.
Scroll down the image on the left to see the full poster.
Scroll down the image on the left to see the full poster.
Power of Using the Meta Moment
Power of Using the Meta Moment
A mom describes how she uses the Meta-moment to be her "Best Self".
A mom describes how she uses the Meta-moment to be her "Best Self".
Role-modeling is so powerful!
Role-modeling is so powerful!
6 Steps of the Meta Moment
6 Steps of the Meta Moment
- Something happens to trigger a strong feeling.
- You sense physical warning signs in your body, such as racing heart, hot face, headache, sweaty palms.
- Use your "stop signal" to focus your energy to your thinking, not your emotions. Tell yourself to calm down.
- See your "Best Self": Think about what kind of person you want to be and how you want others to view you.
- Choose a strategy that will help you to be your "best self", such as belly breathing, using positive self-talk, counting backwards slowly.
- Succeed in being your "Best Self" by making a positive choice.
Creating a CALM AREA at Home
Creating a CALM AREA at Home
I have been thinking a lot about our students and the impact of not having the structure of school. Structure is important as it creates a sense of predictability and calm for many of us. During these uncertain times we can have a wide range of feelings, so it is important to have a place to go to reset. When students are at school they can access a calm/quiet area in their room, in the reflection garden or in the rebound room in order to reset.
I have been thinking a lot about our students and the impact of not having the structure of school. Structure is important as it creates a sense of predictability and calm for many of us. During these uncertain times we can have a wide range of feelings, so it is important to have a place to go to reset. When students are at school they can access a calm/quiet area in their room, in the reflection garden or in the rebound room in order to reset.
The students may not have such a space at home, but they could create a CALM AREA with their parent’s consent. The entire family would need to agree on how the calm area would be used: location of the calm area, accessible for all family members (include parents), agreed upon time limit, respect for the tools, etc.. The space would need to be void of distractions, comfortable (pillow on the floor or comfy chair) and have mindfulness tools (paper and pencils/crayons for drawing, a squishy ball, a stuffed animal, relaxing music, etc.). This would be a wonderful family activity that reinforces the students’ SEL skills as well as promoting family bonding.
The students may not have such a space at home, but they could create a CALM AREA with their parent’s consent. The entire family would need to agree on how the calm area would be used: location of the calm area, accessible for all family members (include parents), agreed upon time limit, respect for the tools, etc.. The space would need to be void of distractions, comfortable (pillow on the floor or comfy chair) and have mindfulness tools (paper and pencils/crayons for drawing, a squishy ball, a stuffed animal, relaxing music, etc.). This would be a wonderful family activity that reinforces the students’ SEL skills as well as promoting family bonding.
Below are a few visuals that could be used in the “Home” Calm Area.
Below are a few visuals that could be used in the “Home” Calm Area.
Family meetings are also a great way to set structure & strengthen family bonding.
Family meetings are also a great way to set structure & strengthen family bonding.
Family meetings facilitate communication, showing appreciation, problem solving, bonding and having lots of fun. It is important for everyone in the family to understand their role and responsibility in the meeting. The roles can rotate to different family members once the structure of the meetings has been mastered. Yes, the youngest child may become the facilitator of the meeting! I know meetings sound really boring, but I promise if done right these meetings can be really fun.
Family meetings facilitate communication, showing appreciation, problem solving, bonding and having lots of fun. It is important for everyone in the family to understand their role and responsibility in the meeting. The roles can rotate to different family members once the structure of the meetings has been mastered. Yes, the youngest child may become the facilitator of the meeting! I know meetings sound really boring, but I promise if done right these meetings can be really fun.
Meeting Structure:
Meeting Structure:
- Agenda - Everyone in the family can write on the agenda a problem that has come up during the week.
- Compliments - Family members give each other genuine "internal" compliments; compliments about the person's abilities, skill or character.
- Brainstorming for Solutions - Generate solutions for the problems on the agenda.
- A Fun Family Activity - It is important to make sure that the family participates in a fun activity at the end of the meeting.
- Calendar for Family Fun Event: Schedule activities that the family can do throughout the week or month.
If you are interested in learning more about family meetings, take a look at Positive Discipline, by Jane Nelson. Click HERE to be forwarded to a link that describes family meetings in more detail.
If you are interested in learning more about family meetings, take a look at Positive Discipline, by Jane Nelson. Click HERE to be forwarded to a link that describes family meetings in more detail.
Home Expectations & Rules
Home Expectations & Rules
Parents, try watching this read-aloud video of the book "Clark the Shark" together with your student. Then, use the ideas below to talk with your child about what rules are needed at home, now that schooling is at home.
Parents, try watching this read-aloud video of the book "Clark the Shark" together with your student. Then, use the ideas below to talk with your child about what rules are needed at home, now that schooling is at home.
Clark the Shark has to learn there’s a time and place for everything.
Clark the Shark has to learn there’s a time and place for everything.
- What rules or expectations did you have in your class at Shorewood?
- Do you have rules or expectations in your home?
- Think about a time when you have been too loud or wild at home. What happened? How did that effect others?
- What rules or expectations do you think you'll need at home to help everyone get along during our school closure?
How to help your child talk through their anxiety during this difficult time
How to help your child talk through their anxiety during this difficult time
Show them that you get it
Show them that you get it
In general, kids need to feel heard, understood, and validated. This is especially true if they are dealing with a lot of worry, fear, and anxiety. Letting your child talk through their thoughts and feelings, and showing that you get it through your responses, is one way adults can help lessen the anxiety kids may be feeling. You can show you understand your child by summarizing what you hear them say, and reflect back to them the feelings they are describing.
In general, kids need to feel heard, understood, and validated. This is especially true if they are dealing with a lot of worry, fear, and anxiety. Letting your child talk through their thoughts and feelings, and showing that you get it through your responses, is one way adults can help lessen the anxiety kids may be feeling. You can show you understand your child by summarizing what you hear them say, and reflect back to them the feelings they are describing.
Ask what kind of support they would like
Ask what kind of support they would like
It can be very empowering for kids to have a choice of what kind of support (if any) they need from us. Sometimes, just being there to listen and validate their feelings (see above) is enough for helping kids feel better. However, it can also be helpful to ask your child what kind of support they would like. For example, you could ask, "What would you like from (mommy/daddy/grandma etc.) right now? We can talk about these worries together and become detectives to find evidence that tells us our fears probably won't come true, or I could give you a big hug, or we could play a game, or go for a walk?"
It can be very empowering for kids to have a choice of what kind of support (if any) they need from us. Sometimes, just being there to listen and validate their feelings (see above) is enough for helping kids feel better. However, it can also be helpful to ask your child what kind of support they would like. For example, you could ask, "What would you like from (mommy/daddy/grandma etc.) right now? We can talk about these worries together and become detectives to find evidence that tells us our fears probably won't come true, or I could give you a big hug, or we could play a game, or go for a walk?"
Model tolerance of uncertainty
Model tolerance of uncertainty
Kids tend to pick up on our verbal and nonverbal signals, behaviors, fears, and tension. While this is certainly a difficult period for all of us, the way we model the management of our worry and anxiety can affect the lens from which kids see the world, themselves, and their future. Consider checking in with your own feelings, modeling a tolerance of uncertainty by thinking and behaving in ways that welcome the unknown, and conveying confidence in your ability to problem solve whatever the future holds.
Kids tend to pick up on our verbal and nonverbal signals, behaviors, fears, and tension. While this is certainly a difficult period for all of us, the way we model the management of our worry and anxiety can affect the lens from which kids see the world, themselves, and their future. Consider checking in with your own feelings, modeling a tolerance of uncertainty by thinking and behaving in ways that welcome the unknown, and conveying confidence in your ability to problem solve whatever the future holds.
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