This month, our school community is focusing on resilience—the ability to bounce back from challenges, mistakes, and disappointments. During the intermediate years, students begin to face more academic expectations, social changes, and opportunities to take on responsibility. Developing resilience helps children learn that setbacks are a normal part of learning and growth. When students practice perseverance, problem-solving, and positive self-talk, they gain confidence in their ability to handle challenges both in and out of the classroom.

There are many simple activities families can do together to strengthen resilience. Consider encouraging your child to try something new or slightly challenging, such as learning a new skill, completing a puzzle, cooking a new recipe, or setting a small personal goal for the week. Family discussions about challenges and successes can also help children reflect on how they handled difficult situations. By supporting persistence, celebrating effort, and reminding children that setbacks are part of learning, we can help them build the resilience they need to thrive.

10 Ways to Build Resilience

1. Let Them Struggle (A Little)

Avoid solving every problem immediately.

How to do it:

• If they forget homework, let them talk to the teacher about it.

• If they argue with a friend, guide them to figure out what they could say next time.

Children build confidence when they experience that they can recover from mistakes.

2. Normalize Disappointment

Talk openly about setbacks as a normal part of life.

Examples:

• If they don’t make a sports team, acknowledge the disappointment but avoid immediately trying to “fix” it.

• Share stories of times you faced disappointment and what helped you move forward.
  
  

3. Teach Emotional Regulation Skills

Kids need tools for when emotions run high.

Simple strategies:

• Take a short break before reacting.

• Use breathing or a quick walk to reset.

• Encourage naming emotions (“I’m frustrated because…”).

These help children handle challenges without becoming overwhelmed.

4. Encourage Problem-Solving Instead of Giving Answers

When kids come with a problem, respond with questions.

Examples:

• “What do you think would help?”

• “What are two things you could try?”

• “Who could help you with that?”

This strengthens independence and persistence.

5. Give Them Real Responsibilities

Household responsibilities build competence and reliability.

Ideas:

• Cooking part of dinner once a week

• Managing their school materials

• Taking care of a pet

Responsibility helps kids see themselves as capable contributors.

6. Model Calm Responses to Stress

Children learn resilience largely by watching adults.

Model things like:

• Staying calm when plans change

• Talking through frustration instead of reacting impulsively

• Taking breaks when overwhelmed
  
  

7. Encourage Long-Term Activities

Activities that require practice over time help kids experience setbacks and improvement.

Examples:

• Music lessons

• Sports

• Art or building projects

• Coding or robotics club

The key is sticking with something long enough to face challenges.

8. Focus on Effortful Experiences, Not Just Outcomes

Instead of celebrating only success, talk about the experience.

Examples:

• “What part of the project was hardest?”

• “What did you try when it got tricky?”

• “What would you do differently next time?”
  
  

9. Help Them Build Support Networks

Resilient kids know they don’t have to handle everything alone.

Encourage:

• Trusted adults (teachers, coaches)

• Friendships

• Asking for help when needed
  
  

10. Allow Safe Risk-Taking

Kids build resilience by trying things where failure is possible but safe.

Examples:

• Trying out for a play

• Entering a competition

• Presenting an idea in class

Looking for additional resources or ideas? Check out the following resources!

• A Guide to Resilience - Center for the Developing Child at Harvard University 

• Raising Resilient Kids Who Are Prepared for the Future - Child Mind Institute 

• Raising Resilient Children in Uncertain Times - Psychology Today

• Raising Resilience: How to Help Our Children THRIVE in Times of Uncertainty by Tovah P. Klein  

• How to Build Resilient Children - TEDTalk 

Kindness is a powerful act that can have massive impacts on everyone – not just the one receiving the kindness, but the one performing the kind act, as well. Studies have shown that when someone performs an act of kindness, the reward center in the brain is activated. This releases the neurotransmitters dopamine and oxytocin. Dopamine is known as the “feel-good hormone.” When it is released, we feel happier. Oxytocin is known as the “love hormone.” When oxytocin is released, it makes us feel bonded and connected to others. Next time you or your student are feeling down in the dumps, encourage them to perform an act of kindness; it could turn their whole day around!

Kindness is contagious. Research shows that it can have a ripple effect that extends beyond simply the giver and receiver of the act. When someone observes or receives a kind act, they are more likely to perform an act themselves, sending a ripple of compassion, connection, and kindness that can spread throughout the whole community. Your one small act of kindness can therefore impact people you’ve never even met before!

How do we raise kind children? There is not one easy answer or magic lesson that helps children understand the importance of kindness. It is in the everyday moments -- how we model kindness to our children, how we speak to them in their own moments of overwhelm, what values we pass along to them, the relationships we build with them, and the opportunities we create for them to show kindness and compassion.

This month’s challenge is to create a culture of kindness here at McKelvie. By completing one small act of kindness, each of us can start a ripple that will spread throughout our school community. February 17 is National Random Acts of Kindness Day, but we challenge all of our students to be kind everyday! Below, find a list of 100 random acts of kindness to inspire you and your student to make a difference. We can’t wait to hear about the impact this kindness has on you and our community!

Source: https://www.coffeecupsandcrayons.com/100-acts-kindness-kids/

Looking for additional resources or ideas? Check out the following resources!

• Harvard Graduate School of Education - 7 Tips for Raising Caring Kids 

• Random Acts of Kindness Foundation 

• Psychology Today - Yes, You Do Make a Difference. Here's the Proof. 

• Be Kind - The Science of Kindness