Time Machine

Conflict Resolution

The Conflict Resolution Time Machine is designed to help teach children conflict resolution skills and provide a structured procedure to help adults safely overcome skill deficiencies they might have from their own upbringing. It provides concrete steps and gives specific language for helpful, healthy ways to meet our needs.

Positive Action Guide

Below are key phrases that illustrate how to help children express what they want rather than what they don’t want. Instead of the common statement, “Please don’t _____,” reframe to what behavior is desirable.

I don’t like it when you write on my paper. Please write on your paper.

I don’t like it when you call me names. Please call me Alex. That is my name.

I don’t like it when you push me. Please say, “Move, please.”

I don’t like it when you talk when the teacher is talking. Please be quiet so I can hear.

I don’t like it when you back up in line and step on me. Please walk forward so we’ll both be safe.

I don’t like it when you thump my head. Please call out, “Hey, Omar” if you want my attention.

I don't like it when you cut in line. Please go to your spot. This one is mine.

I don’t like it when you take my pencil. Please give it back and find your own.

Conscious Discipline Sentence Frames for Educators / Caregivers

Skill of composure

You’re Safe.

Breathe with me.

You can handle this.

Smile

Take a deep breath

And

Relax

skill of assertiveness

Always go to the victim first.

Did you like it?

Tell your friend, ‘I don’t like it when you ____(hurtful action)______.

Please _____(new skill)________.”

Skill of Empathy

Your face is going like this.

You seem _(feeling)___.

Something happened?

You wanted _(state their desire)___

(or you were hoping _(state their desire)_.

It’s hard.

Breathe with me.

You can handle it.

skill of Positive Intent

You wanted _(state their desire)___,

So you _(hurtful action)___.

You didn’t know what else to do.

You may not _(hurtful action)__,

_(hurtful action)___ hurts.

When you want _(state their desire)___,

Say ‘_(teach a new skill)___’.

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