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Logistical Fallacies:
A Final Goodbye
Logistical Fallacies:
A Final Goodbye
By Trinity Croft
Ladies, gentlemen, neithers, boths, and in-between-ers, for three glorious auditions, Logistical Fallacies has made its way into the paper as an absurdist advice column. As the school year comes to a close, I need to be honest with you, readers.
I’m taking this as a chance to be a bit self-absorbed and write about me, instead of everyone else’s problems. I started writing this column as a way to publish a little bit of entropy, a little bit of my absurd humor into the world. It felt like a stupid way to combat the writer’s block I was feeling. The weird thing is that it worked. Suddenly, I was excited to start writing again. I’m a performer and entertainer at heart, and I’m delighted I got the opportunity to write my own odd comedy for other people to read. There are so many private jokes and references tucked into the lines of the paper. Logistical Fallacies was by far my favorite project of the year.
Another thing I should be honest about: No one sent in questions. I know, the public is gasping and reeling. I set up an email for the column listed at the end of every edition, yet the inbox gathered cobwebs. It was a bit disheartening. The questions really came from my friends and I. We brainstormed, and anything that sparked a wacky idea made the cut. Every edition of Logistical Fallacies came with a dozen scrapped questions. Each. The actual scramble of ‘What are we putting in the paper, what are we putting in the paper?’ was always ridiculous. It was just so different from studying for final exams or writing a clinical essay for biology. The process of generating something so surreal was a very enlightening experience.
Another question I’ve taken it upon myself to answer is about the ‘author’s image’ that has gone in with Logistical Fallacies. The blue worm-on-a-string. His name is Dryer, and he was gifted to me in the sixth grade. I think he’s a ridiculous creature with his tiny googly eyes and weird furry body. Naturally, he was a perfect pick for the column’s mascot. So… that clears that up. (He is currently alive and well. He still travels to school with me every day. <3)
Everything sort of fell into place all at once. The mascot, the idea, the strange humor. Even the pseudonym didn’t take long to come up with. My mother wanted to name me Atticus Finch, from To Kill a Mockingbird. She sometimes mentions how, really, it would’ve been fitting. So I had a mascot, a premise, and a pen name. Thus came the birth of Logistical Fallacies: An advice column. Now, you may be thinking, ‘Finch, what the hell is a Logistical Fallacy?’ It’s a common error in an argument that makes your reasoning invalid. Things like ad hominems, generalizations, gaslighting, etc. I thought the idea of my ‘argument’ on how to best handle situations being consistently invalid due to sheer abstractions was funny.
Getting to write this column has truly been a pleasure. Even if it was ridiculous, even if no one read it. If I haven’t made it evident yet, I really like to talk about myself, and I really like to make people laugh. That is why I’m rather disheartened to announce to whoever may be reading that Logistical Fallacies will not be continued any further. While its run was short, I’m glad I had the experience of writing it.
And with that, the final edition of Logistical Fallacies has reached its end. As always, I’ve been your host, Finch. And remember, ladies, gentlemen, neithers, boths, and inbetweeners: the future is coming rapidly, but it settles silently and unflinchingly into the present. Change is inevitable; the best you can do is scream about it. If you’ve made it this far, thank you. Wherever you are, dear reader, have a good morning, good afternoon, good evening, and goodnight.
"Trucks or Cars: Which are Better?" (CONTINUED) by Evan Oberle
Some pros of owning a truck are higher towing capacity, higher suspension travel length to go places a car can’t, and a bed for more storage. Overall, a truck is better for blue collar jobs that this world depends on. Some cons would be that trucks are bigger than cars so they are harder to get into tight spaces, which makes it not as good of a daily driver who has to park in a lot.
Pros to owning a car include a higher MPG with an average of 24 MPG, while a truck is averaging 17, so a car is better for the environment, and better for a driver with a city job. Cons of owning a car are you can’t really tow anything, not as much cab room, not as much ground clearance, and they usually don’t run as long as a truck.
Because of what I like to do for work, trucks are better than cars for me. You can do much more with trucks, and can even make more money with a truck, because of your ability to tow and haul things.
Check out columns and editorials that didn't appear in the Addison Independent June 3rd:
A Different View of Zionism
By Eliza Doucet
With tensions rising all over the world due to the spike in Israeli-Palestinian violence, it’s important to understand that Zionism and supporting the Israeli government are not the same thing. Because of this distinction, more people should be Zionists.
Zionism is defined as “a movement for (originally) the re-establishment and (now) the development and protection of a Jewish nation in what is now Israel.” According to history.com, the term “Zion'' originates from the Hebrew word for Jerusalem, Judaism’s most holy location. Therefore, Zionism means supporting the Jewish right to a homeland in the Israel area. Today, when many people hear the word “Zionist” they think of people who support the oppression and ethnic cleansing currently happening in Palestine. Though the word has come to represent this, in its most basic form, Zionism is actually about fighting oppression.
Many choose to oppose Zionism due to this misunderstanding. However, because of Zionism is different from supporting the Israeli government, it’s possible to be a Zionist and fight the oppresion of Palestinans. This is a point that many activists, specifically those on the left side of the political spectrum, fail to recognize. When people view Zionism as being anti-Palestian, they mistakenly classify themselves as anti-Zionist. All people should be Zionists because of the centuries-old history of Jewish oppression. The original idea behind establishing a Jewish homeland was to create an area free from the systemic oppression Jews have faced worldwide. Jewish people deserve to have a safe haven. Jewish people are the oldest oppressed group in existence. Everyone should stand up to the oppression of all groups, and Jews are no exception. Being against Zionism is equal to being against Jews and their safety.
Another important thing is that not all “Zionists” are against the violence currently happening in Palestine. My view of Zionism is based on the idea of fighting oppression in all groups of people. But many people still view Zionism as hatred of Palestinans. It’s essential that everyone, regardless of background and ethnicity, recognizes their biases and understands that to be anti-oppression, you must be pro-Palestine and pro-Zionism. It’s important to fight oppression in all its forms. When trying to educate yourself on the Israeli-Palestinan conflict, it’s essential to understand that it’s fully possible to be an ally to the Palestinians while still being a Zionist.
Zionism isn’t the bad thing it’s often viewed as. Being a Zionist should mean fighting the oppression of Palestinians as well as that of Jews. Because Zionism and supporting the Israli government are completely separate ideas, being a Zionist isn’t being anti-Palestine. Everyone who wants to be truly anti-oppression, should identify as a Zionist.
More Opportunities for Student Voice at Mt. Abe
By Isabella Currier
Mt. Abraham has come a long way in terms of involving student voice. Students are eager to embrace the opportunities that have recently arisen to get involved in changes in our district that may create a better future for upcoming generations.
Many students have already found their voice in Community Council. Proposals are sent to the council from anyone in the community, students, and staff members, in hopes of bringing forth some kind of change. In Community Council meetings, students and faculty members converse and decide whether these proposals will benefit the rest of the student body and faculty. The Community Council is made up of four representatives from each grade level, a staff member from each department, community members from each of the five towns, along with administrative members such as Superintendent Patrick Reen and Principal Shannon Warden. The council has come a long way since 2018, when it restarted, hoping to reestablish student interest and promote involvement in the issues facing Mt. Abe. Thankfully, the council has since made a name for itself and has growing numbers and enough proposals to keep them going all year.
Through Community Council, students are also given the opportunity to serve on the school board to offer their voice at a higher level. While these students are elected to serve on the board and their feedback and response to all issues are always welcome, they are not allowed to vote, but still serve an important role for student advocacy. Allowing students to serve on the board and offer feedback is something not many other schools do, so this is an amazing opportunity to play a minor role in policy.
At the end of January and into early February, the MAUSD school board created a survey for the 5-town area to determine next steps for the future of our district's education. The board was seeking feedback from all community members, but most importantly, from the students who the issue will directly affect. The survey asked questions about what the community would like to see happen for their schools. Because members of the community wanted their respective town schools to stay open, the survey created more questions than answers. Although it seemed that the survey did not serve the purpose it was intended to, the efforts behind this survey did not go unnoticed and were appreciated.
There are many other outlets for student voice at Mt. Abe. Many clubs have been formed, such as EAP, where students talk about environmental issues, and Eagles Student Activism, or ESA, which concerns itself with global and social issues. Many students are grateful to attend a school where student voice is something that is valued.
Sports Shouldn’t Return? (Year End 2020)
By Hayden Barrows
Next, I walk 15 minutes up Gangapur Road. This road buzzes with college students rushing to class. Stretching in all directions are kids in their various college uniforms, resembling schools of fish.
I arrive at KTHM College and walk through the red gate, after security inspects my identification card. KTHM has a large campus with at least five separate buildings. It is located on the bank of the Godavari River and has a lovely amount of foliage. I walk across the green to my building “Annex One.” Here, in Room 313, I spend my day. I sit hip to hip with a classmate, bumping elbows as we frantically take notes. I study math, physics, chemistry, geography, English, and French. I decided I couldn’t take six days a week of full science so I elected to join boat club and music classes. I spend two hours of each day rowing in the river or singing Indian traditional music. At 2 pm I leave college, while my peers continue to study for two more hours.
From 3-4 pm I volunteer at a school for young deaf children. I play football with them or make art, or simply sit with them as they teach me Hindi sign language. It is always an incredible part of my day. These kids have such big hearts and goofy personalities, it is just so much fun to play with them.
At 5 pm I take tution of the Marathi language. I sit on the floor of the tutor’s apartment with seven kids much younger than I am. I complete my assignments with the help of the kids looking over my shoulder saying “nahi idi” and fixing my mistakes.
After tution I walk home. On the way I often get swept up into a football or cricket game. The neighborhood kids and I play until it gets dark. At this point I have only been playing for about 15 minutes and am exhausted. They, on the other hand were playing all through the last hour and wish to continue. It takes all of my big sister authority to get Samyak home.
Ritu, Samyak, and I join my parents in the living room. We chat about our days until Samyak gets bored and begs me to play with him. I taught him and Ritu every card game I know. We three play until one of them accuses the other of cheating and the game falls apart.
My mom and I make dinner, which really means that my mom makes dinner and I watch. I chop veggies, make chapati, and anything else she’ll let me handle.
My family and I all sit together cross legged on the floor and eat rice with our hands. It took my at least two months to feel as if I had mastered the etiquette of hand eating. It took me even longer to master the art of gracefully eating spicy food. To say that the food is incredible is an understatement.
After eating, the evening is far from over. My siblings and I play hide and seek. My grandma gives us all rigorous coconut oil head massages. Sometimes we even sing and dance just for fun. Almost every night we sit and watch a Hindi soap opera together. My papa pretends to be reading the newspaper but it sneakily watching. Samyak talks the whole time and Ritu throws pillows at him to silence him. My mom sits, fully focused on the show, often with tears in her eyes. I just sit, understanding almost nothing. I laugh when they laugh and I hold my mom’s hand when she cries.
Ritu and I are always the last to go upstairs. We sit downstairs and do the homework we should have done already. By the time we finish our homework, the entire house is asleep, so we shut the light off and walk upstairs to our room. We lie beside each other whispering and stifling our laughter. Eventually we are both exhausted and turn over to sleep. We groans thinking about waking up tomorrow, but I know I’m actually excited to do so.
Every day with my family and in this city is a day I see something new, and do things that make me happy. It’s an incredible life that I get to live here in India this year.
YearEnd 2017
The NFL Should Move On From Commissioner Roger Goodell
In my opinion, sports shouldn’t return because it would just help with the coronavirus slowing down. Major league sports should just cancel their seasons and wait for next season. I do understand the reasoning of the people that think sports should return, with an shortened season and without any fans.
A Day in My Life in India By Louisa Funk (continued from YearEnd 2019)
Since early March, there have been no live sports in the U.S, amid the chaos of Covid-19. The only sports that have returned recently are the UFC, and Nascar. I have enjoyed watching some classic games, but after a while, it becomes boring. The NBA suspended its season in early March after a player of the Utah Jazz tested positive for Covid-19. The commissioner of the NBA has brought multiple plans to resume the season without fans. For example, he suggested starting with the playoffs, skipping the regular season, and having the games played in one location Disney World, or Las Vegas. Many people believe the NBA shouldn’t return, because they will need around 15,000 tests for the players to get tested daily. If the U.S. doesn’t have those tests available for the public so it would seem like a bad action if the NBA used that many tests. On the other hand, if the NBA returned it would help the economy out greatly and bring live sports back for some much needed entertainment.
The MLB suspended its season in early March after the commissioner for the MLB met with all 30 club owners and they decided unanimously to suspend the season. The MLB shouldn’t return because they will need a certain amount for tests and that will take the tests from the majority of people. But if the MLB did return it would be played in a certain city and without any fans. It would also help the economy of sports if the MLB returned.
By Mason Wood
Roger Goodell has been the NFL Commissioner for the past eleven years. Many people think Goodell is the worst thing that has happened to the NFL.
One of the worst decisions Goodell made was in 2012, when he brought in high school and college referees after pro officials went on strike. The referees went on strike after they believed they were not being paid enough. Goodell countered with not paying them what they wanted and brought in the infamous “replacement refs”. The “replacement refs” were nervous and not qualified to officiate a professional football game. This resulted in game-altering calls that made many fans and coaches angry. This issue with the refs was eventually resolved after many unnecessary mistakes were made by giving them the raise they wanted, but this will always leave a mark on Goodell’s career.
Many NFL players deal with suspensions every year. At this point it is really a part of the game now. To determine how long the length of those suspensions are is up to the Commissioner. In 2014, after Ray Rice viciously beat his fiancee in a hotel elevator, he received a two game suspension from the NFL. Players receive full year suspensions for smoking marijuana in the NFL, so two games is a joke for a crime like that. To make matters worse, once the video of Rice beating his wife was released to the public and he was then suspended indefinitely. This video apparently was already in possession of the NFL before the public had seen it, so Goodell had knowingly suspended a criminal for a mere two games. In another incident, former New York Giants kicker Josh Brown admitted to abusing his wife and was only suspended one game. Goodell needs to get his priorities straight with the suspensions or else felons will keep getting to play in the league.
Debatably, the worst decision Goodell has ever made came from the NFL’s “Salute to Service” campaign. Having the NFL wear camo gear and support the military is a great thing, but what Goodell didn’t telling us is that he made the military pay 10.4 million dollars to have soldiers come out onto the field before games and to have teams support camo equipment. Yearly Goodell makes more money than most of the players in the game. Last year he earned a salary of 34 million dollars. Goodell has become very greedy and the NFL is about only money since Goodell has taken over.
Goodell is the villain of the NFL and needs to be removed as soon as possible. The problem is that he has all the power, so it is hard to overrule him. For the sake of the game he will hopefully be removed in the future and there will be a new commissioner who appreciates the game and players a little more.
YearEnd 2017
Women have a Choice that’s Safe and Legal
By Brooke Perlee
When people hear the word abortion, the hairs on the back of their neck stand up, it’s murder, dangerous, and just plain terrible. To many people's surprise, abortions are safe, reliable, and common; women get shunned if they get an abortion when it is their choice.
Women seek abortions to end pregnancy for all sorts of reasons that may include; poverty, bad health, incest, rape, problems with developing fetus, or they don’t want a baby because it’s not the right time in their lives. No matter the reason, there are options and it’s important for women to know what those options are and how they work.
There are two common and safe ways to get an abortion: with medication or in a clinical procedure. The abortion pill is a safe and reliable way to end a pregnancy in the early months. The pill is 98% effective for women who take the pill at eight weeks or less. Planned Parenthood offers the pill, and it costs about $800 or less. MedlinePlus explains the process of the abortion with medication, the doctor and nurse will give the patient the first pill at the clinic, Mifepristone. Mifepristone blocks the body from producing estrogen, and a pregnancy requires this hormone to continue. A few days later, the patient will take Misoprostol, the second pill. The medication will cause the women to basically think she is having a very heavy and crampy period or a miscarriage as the medication works to empty the uterus. “The medication is less invasive and more natural than the clinical procedure,” (https://medlineplus.gov/ency/patientinstructions/000835.htm).
According to Planned Parenthood, there are different clinical procedures, depending on how far along the pregnancy is, and the doctor will determine the best option for each patient. Typically, the most common clinical procedure is the suction abortion; the procedure is only used 14-16 weeks after the patient last period. It uses mild suction to pull the uterine contents through the cervix.
Most abortion occurs in the first trimester of pregnancy, but for pregnancies that are farther along, a dilation and evacuation (D&E) is the most common procedure. In some states a D&E is illegal unless the mother is in danger or the fetus is dead. A D&E is like the suction abortion, with the vacuum like tool, except that the cervix will need to be dilated for this procedure. The doctors will use other instruments during the procedure, like a curette, to scrape the inside of the uterus to ensure all contents are gone, (https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/abortion#sthash.dZj87rmA.dpuf).
The mother is carrying and feeding this unborn fetus; the father or anyone else involved couldn’t possibly be the one who gets the right to choose to terminate or to continue with a pregnancy. Ultimately, women have the right to choose what is done to their body.
According to Guttmacher Institute, “Nearly half (45%) of all pregnancies among U.S. women in 2011 were unintended, and about 4 in 10 of these were terminated by abortion,” (www.guttmacher.org/fact-sheet/induced-abortion-united-states).
Why do People Cheat?
By Shyanna Cram
Some people cheat because they think the other person isn’t good enough, or sometimes they don’t realize what they are doing because they aren’t sober. People get mad, upset, or hurt over the fact that their other spouse cheated. People usually think that it would never happen and they have trust, then it just happens and we don’t know why.
I have been cheated on before and the excuse always was “I didn’t know what I was doing baby, I’m so sorry.” Guys or even girls usually say, “It will never happen again if you just take me back.”
Usually if a person can cheat once and not feel bad or not tell the truth then you always can cheat and feel that way. Cheaters usually feel really guilty, but still try to lie about it, thinking that the other spouse wouldn't find out. Others might feel like cheating is unnecessary. If you don’t want to be with someone, then just break up with them, don’t cheat.
If you know your boundaries, then use them. Don’t just do it because you don’t want to make things uncomfortable with the person that is trying to make moves. If you know you’re going to do something, then walk away and say, “I should be heading home.”
Cheating is not needed and no one should do it or even think about it. Stay faithful, stay loyal.
Studying abroad and new opportunities for learning June 2015
Are you a high school student looking for ways to expand your education beyond the wall of Mt. Abe? Are you interested in non-traditional academic settings for your learning? Kiley Pratt and Izzy Moody, both of whom have had the opportunity to study outside of Mt. Abe, have put together a pamphlet for anyone who is looking to study abroad, experience semester school, or learn leadership and other skills at summer and weekend camps. Programs featured include:
SEGL, a semester and summer program in Washington, DC focusing on politics and international relations
Where There be Dragons, running semester and summer trips to developing countries to study religion, language, development, and a variety of other topics
The Island School, a semester school in the Bahamas which teaches marine biology and traditional topics in an island setting
And many more! Stop by the guidance office to check out the official copy, or email Kiley Pratt at 15pratk@anesu.org for more information.
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