Nice Definitions

Wonderfully described definitions.........

CIGARETTE:

A pinch of tobacco

rolled in paper

with fire at one end

and a fool at the other!

MARRIAGE:

It's an agreement

wherein

a man loses his bachelor degree

and a woman gains her master

LECTURE:

An art of transmitting Information

from the notes of the lecturer

to the notes of students

without passing through the minds

of either

CONFERENCE:

The confusion of one man

multiplied by the

number present

COMPROMISE:

The art of dividing

a cake in such a way that

everybody believes

he got the biggest piece

TEARS:

The hydraulic force by which

masculine will power is

defeated by feminine water-power!

CONFERENCE ROOM:

A place where everybody talks,

nobody listens

and everybody disagrees later on

ECSTASY:

A feeling when you feel

you are going to feel

a feeling

you have never felt before

CLASSIC:

A book

which people praise,

but never read

SMILE:

A curve

that can set

a lot of things straight!

OFFICE:

A place

where you can relax

after your strenuous

home life

YAWN:

The only time

when some married men

ever get to open

their mouth

EXPERIENCE:

The name

men give

to their

Mistakes

DIPLOMAT:

A person

who tells you

to go to hell

in such a way

that you actually look forward

to the trip

OPTIMIST:

A person

who while falling

from EIFFEL TOWER

says in midway

"SEE I AM NOT INJURED YET!"

MISER:

A person

who lives poor

so that

he can die RICH!

FATHER:

A banker

provided by

nature

BOSS:

Someone

who is early

when you are late

and late

when you are early

POLITICIAN:

One who

shakes your hand

before elections

and your Confidence

Later

DOCTOR:

A person

who kills

your ills

by pills,

and kills you

by his bills!