The college search and application process is just that: a process. In order to navigate the process, students must dedicate time and energy to re-searching, gathering information, reflecting on the information they have gathered, completing specific tasks, weighing their options, and making decisions. Students are often quite capable of doing these things, but it never hurts to have support and assistance. That support and assistance can, and often does, come from parents. There are many opportunities for parents to help make this journey less stressful and even even enjoyable...for all involved! Some suggestions below:
Embedded Files
Interest and Aspirations
Students often know that they want to continue their education beyond high school, but they don’t always know what it is they want to study or how their studies might translate into a career path. Parents can help by providing opportunities for students to just talk about what interests them and encouraging them to pursue coursework and activities that allow them to explore their interests and gain experience.
Exploration and Information Gathering
As students begin to identify and confirm their interests, encourage them to set aside time to explore the educational pathways that will allow them to pursue their passion. Remind them that they have abundant resources for exploration in their Naviance Student account where they can take career assessments, research career options, and conduct a college search using their own personal criteria.
Help your Student "Find their Fit"
Be sure to focus on helping your student follow their own path toward finding a good college “fit”... BDHS has a strong college-going culture, and with that culture comes the possibility that students will stray from their own path and do what they think others expect of them or pursue prestige at the expense of fit. There are over 4,000 colleges and universities in the United States alone, but many students are only familiar with the schools where the majority of their peers go or that appear in national rankings. Encourage them to identify their own personal criteria for finding a college that fits with their preferences, personality, interests, and aspirations. Parents should take care not to confuse their own preferences with that of their student’s.
Provide Support AND Foster Independence
Provide support, but foster independence throughout the process...
Admissions representatives expect that students who are planning to attend College are independent enough to complete their own applications, write their own essays, and send necessary materials. This is a perfect time for parents to communicate to their students that this is an important step on the road to independence and adulthood. Parents should refrain from requesting transcripts or test scores for their student or completing portions of their applications, instead they can best serve as a resource when their student gets stuck or needs suggestions for next steps.
Discuss Family Financial Information
Discuss your family’s financial expectations and commitment to paying for college...One of the most important things parents can do is to have honest conversations with their student about the family’s position to pay for the college options students are considering. This is something that should be done early and often to minimize disappointment and misunderstandings. Sit down together as a family and review financial aid and scholarship resources, costs associated with different schools, and expectations about how much students might be expected to contribute to their own education.
Visit Colleges with your Student
Visit schools whenever possible, and let your student take the driver’s seat...College visits offer a unique opportunity for students to experience the campus environment first-hand. Visiting a variety of campuses is ideal: large and small, public and private, urban and rural. Prior to the visit, parents can help students identify questions they want to ask or things they want to look and listen for during the visit. During the visit, parents should allow their student to ask questions for themselves. Parents are certainly encouraged to ask questions from a parent perspective, but whenever possible, let your student take the lead. After the visit, parents can assist students in narrowing their criteria by facilitating conversation about what they did and did not like about specific schools.
Time management and Organizational Skills
Encourage the use of time management skills and organizational strategies...As students begin the college application process, parents can encourage the use of time management and organizational skills such as keeping a calendar of deadlines, establishing a physical or electronic space for managing applications, or creating a spreadsheet of application requirements. Parents can model and teach these skills (if students don’t already utilize them), but they should avoid taking over the process and doing it for them. Offering reminders, providing suggestions, checking in on progress, and offering words of encouragement are ideal ways that parents can help.
Communicate With Your Student, Not For Them
Communicate with your student, not for them...Communicating via email, phone, or in-person is an integral part of the college application process, and those professionals who work to help shepherd students through the process expect that the student will be the one communicating. Parents can certainly assist students in finding the right words to ask appropriate questions or make specific requests, but the student should always be the one doing the communicating. Parents can remind students to check their email accounts or brainstorm questions before a college visit, but whenever possible, parents should expect and allow students to communicate for themselves.
Celebrate Acceptances and Educate on Denials
Celebrate acceptances with your student AND remind them that admission denials are not a statement of their worth...
When students learn of admissions decisions it can prove both exciting and disappointing depending on the outcome. Parents are among the first to celebrate acceptances, but they also often find it the hardest to weather the denials with their student. Be sure to celebrate the good news while offering confirmation that the denials are not a statement of the student’s worthiness or even ability.
Admissions denials are rarely due to the fact that the student did something wrong, instead it may just be that the candidate pool was competitive or admission representatives felt that their campus did not provide the best opportunity for the student to thrive, i.e. it wasn’t a best fit. Parents can help soften the disappointment by reminding students about all of their previous accomplishments and exciting opportunities that lie ahead.
Listen to your Student’s Questions/Concerns/Frustration
Listen to your student’s questions, concerns, and frustration about the process, and then encourage them to use all available resources to find answers and lessen the stress...This process can prove stressful and sometimes even frustrating, and when that happens parents can be at the ready to listen and help students problem solve. Parents can serve the vital role of providing an alternative perspective or offering suggestions for seeking help. Ultimately, reassuring them that they are capable of getting through the process successfully goes a long way toward helping students feel confident and prepared to take next steps.
Help Your Student Make a Final College Choice
Help your student make a final college choice by listening and being supportive...In most cases, there is likely more than one college that presents a good fit for students, and that often means that they are faced with making decisions about where to go. Parents can serve as sounding boards for students as they weigh the pros and cons of each option. Parents can also offer additional considerations that their student may be forgetting. In the end, students are most likely to be happy (and excited about) their choice when they feel that they’ve come to the decision on their own and know that they have their parents’ blessing.
FAFSA - Information for Parents
Are you looking for information to help keep your Scholars on track for college and career success? Explore the information below to find out everything you need to know about assisting your Scholars on their journey. Still can’t find what you’re looking for? Contact the 21st Century Scholars program here.
While the Free Application for Federal Student Aid (FAFSA®) form is the student’s application, we know that parents often play a large role in the process. Learn More...
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