entry #8:
i've already lost count of the days. i still can't open it. this is ridiculous. the change is what scares me more than anything. this is all I've known. before this, it was the After, and before that... nothing. beautiful Void. it was bliss, but... it fills me with dread to consider another unknown variable. I've overcome so many, i can't take any more. I won't take any more.