The Timekeeping Act

Timekeeping Act

June 10th, 2025

Article I

The Duffian Republic of Uhopia now officially adopts George Standard Time (GST) as the national timezone. George Standard Time is defined as exactly 4 minutes and 20 seconds ahead of the former national timezone, Eastern Standard Time (EST). George Standard Time is measured according to The Duff’s personal bedside clock, which overpowers all other sources of time. Tampering with The Duff’s bedside clock or attempting to synchronize it with real-world time is a criminal offense punishable by Time Dissonance Correction.

Article II

All governmental functions, national broadcasts, holidays, and official documents must reference George Standard Time, unless interacting with foreign powers. Citizens are encouraged, though not required, to adjust personal clocks to George Standard Time. Public clocks in Uhopia must reflect George Standard Time or be marked as “Non-GST.”

Article III

When interacting with foreign governments, digital services, or external entities, Uhopia may temporarily adopt Coordinated Universal Time (UTC) or the time zone of the foreign power. However, all final Uhopian records shall convert and preserve times in George Standard Time.