The funny 55s - 25. David Joins the Show

#25. David Joins The Show - (BFDI 18-20)

Hello all my theFunny55s readers. So things are going to work a little differently today. Because I thought it was high time I shake some things up. So for this article, I will be handing things to Alien. He has been a vital member of theFunny55s, for quite a few articles now. And I decided what better way to show my appreciation would be to let Alien have a chance to write one of the articles. He's got so many creative ideas, and I'm excited to see what he comes up with for his article And for that he has picked number 25: David joins the show.

So without further ado, please show us how you write articles on Mars.

Not from Mars

Thank you, Remy. Hello people, I am Alien, your residential unfunny extraterrestrial from Mars, or whatever planet I may potentially be from. Now the topic of this article is about David, or more specifically, David joining the show in Season 1.

Useless Stick Figure

This abomination right here, he is the source of my disdain and misery. This goddamned stick figure might look pretty simplistic and innocent, but don't let its static look fool you. He hides some terrible secrets that become incredibly apparent if you have seen any season of BFDI.

His first appearance wasn't as bad as later episodes and seasons of BFDI, but he still had some hints of being whiny and being pretty unlikable by the fanbase in general. Yes, that is how unlikable a non-contestant (at the time) could truly get, even in the early days of BFDI as a whole.

Yeah?! (His first line, never repeated again)

In BFDI 15, during the elimination, there were a bunch of recommended characters that were shown in the background. Out of all of them, David was the only one to get votes, with 39 votes during the elimination. For context, the two contestants at risk, Ice Cube and Eraser got 33 and 99 votes, respectively. So even if Ice Cube wasn't in the danger zone, David would still face a sort of uphill battle as he is considered unlikable by the audience.

Even with Ice Cube and Eraser in the bottom two, David still has more votes than Ice Cube, who is already unlikable and bland.

At the end of BFDI 17, there was a vote to choose which character would start competing near the VERY end of the first season. David was one among many of the recommended characters (RCs), but that might be because he already got votes against him even before the debut vote already started. He was that unlikable.

Unfortunately for many, when it came down to the last few RCs, Ruby was next to be voted of, which funnily enough, would've joined the game if repeat votes were allowed. Of course, this wasn't the case, and she got sent to the Loser Jail Cell. Same thing with Evil Leafy and Nickel, directly lifted from Inanimate Insanity minus the extra arms he had in the debut.

His introduction is shown by him shouting. He, again, never does this again.

Afterwards, the choice was down between Bomby or David, one of which is a recipe for explosive moments in the series, and the other who is just a bland stick figure who apparently counts as an object. Personally I would have loved for Bomby to join, and let's see what that leads into.

The top two votees, I hope it's Bomby!

WHAT?!

HOW DID HE LOSE?!

GODDAMNIT, BOMBY DIDN'T MAKE IT IN. WE GOT A USELESS STICK FIGURE AS A COMPETITOR. WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE? WHY DID YOU VOTE A STICK FIGURE AS A COMPETITOR? WHY DOES HE ONLY SAY "Aww, Seriously?" WHY?

I HATE ALL OF YOU WHO VOTED A USELESS STICK FIGURE OVER AN ACTUALLY COOL CHARACTER, BOMBY!

Take that, asshole.

So anyways, onto the challenge itself. It consists of a staring contest, in a boxing ring no less! So one would think, "This is going to be absolutely boring." You'd be right, except until we get to the final round. Here is a selection of images from throughout the challenge.

Beginning of the Staring contest.

It is nighttime, and they are still going?! God, how long is this going to go on?

In the end, we have the fight between Pencil vs David. It lasts so damn long too, even by BFDI standards, as the challenge goes from afternoon to nighttime, all the way back to sunrise and morning hours. Long story short, David lost due to the sunrise, which I find super odd.

Onto Episode 19, after an amusing intro with Pencil, and Rocky speaking again, we go onto the Cake at Stake segment. After Pencil got eliminated with 259 votes, it was down to 7 people, including the goddamn useless stick figure, a leaf who can't make up her damn mind, and a pair of characters who get killed constantly. This is alao the point in the game where points are no longer a thing. About time they got rid of it.

The points are gone

The contest this episode was to to down a slope and reach the finish line before one gets locked out and gets put up for elimination. This being BFDI, expect lots of fuck-ups of different varieties, especially one that could potentially be dragged out for longer periods of time.

Leafy and Ice Cube falling off the cliff.

And they're STILL falling. Are you sure that the plains of BFDI are even actual territory with THIS kind of stacking?

As for David's performance in the challenge, he kept saying the very same line that he always does, but not long after, he starts to act differently, singing the "Mary Had a Little Lamb" song, but in a weird way. Just like him shouting and turning red, he does this in one episode, and is never brought up again.

David might be Cerberus. This is, once again, NEVER shown again. God, he is a waste.

He nearly won the challenge, having enough speed to jump through the gap. However, Firey was climbing up, desperately trying to get the win in time before David got the chance to win. David burned up, instantly dying. What a pathetic loser.

Getting burned alive near the finish has got the be the worst way to lose a challenge.

For being a loser, he was put up for elimination in BFDI 19, along with 2 other characters. Seeing as he is a bland stick figure who only has one line of dialogue, one can guess how that turned out.

Come BFDI 20, at the Cake at Stake, David is faced with two others to see who goes to the loser jail box. As shown with how one-dimensional his personality is, he got the most votes, and he was out so damn quickly too.

David got the most votes, both for getting into BFDI, and even more for getting out of the game. Way to fucking go, guys.

Yeah, take that, you useless piece of shit.

After the space challenge was over, there was a rejoin, IMMEDIATELY following David's elimination. Of course, only a few people took the bait of bringing David back, especially considering that voters have screwed Bomby over, who was considerably way more interesting than the useless stick figure would ever be.

P.S. I hate this character so much, I wish he got retconned into never showing up or at least, I wish they at least retired David as he barely has any fans to begin with. At the time of writing, the EXITors are MIA, or inside the EXIT, but that could change. Maybe David could be written off the show?

P.P.S. Heyo, Remy here again, thanks for writing this article, it was entertaining to read and oversee. I would like to put in my two cents about David. Firstly I am so happy that he was eliminated immediatley, even if he was insufferable to many, he was only annoying to me, and while he did have some great moments like the cerberus and getting burned alive by Firey. I'm happy he was eliminated before he could truly do some damage to the show. But to think that he is a player with one of the highest averages is pretty insulting to think about. Eighth place, that's stil higher than characters like Ruby and Bubble. So thank goodness he was booted right before a second dark age would begin, imagine having this guy in the finale. Imagine him winning? It's impossible, but still concerning that he made it that far in the first place.

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