Freshman Set Mount Carmel Record of Worst Freshman Yet

As another wave of fresh meat hits Mount Carmel, mischief is arising again and roaming in the hallways. This year’s class of freshmen turns out to be the worst ever recorded. Since their arrival, nothing has seemed to go right: ducking class to play Clash Royale in the bathroom, bringing anything but a phone to put in the caddy, sounding a dog whistle in class to silently torment the teacher—the list goes on and on.

Overall, freshmen have been on a downward trend due to learning poor behaviors from the previous classes. Sophomores and juniors do things that the underclassmen pick up on and later pass on to new students, creating new super-bad students each year. Faculty speculate that if something doesn't change soon, MC’s reputation may tank, and those boys at 77th and Western will take the reputation of a “Man of Carmel,” winning it like some last-place consolation prize.

The reason for this bad behavior is unknown. Although, some think it has to do with developmental issues that arose from COVID, it really has to do with changing social standards of kids in society. Kids roam around on scooters, hang out at the park after curfew, and wander around in packs, getting up to no good. When doing these activities kids are known to not give a care in the world and damage others or their belongings.

“I don't know why people suspect me of anything, said freshman Abel Krammer. Krammer, a Beverly native, dreamed his entire life about coming to MC. “I'm just here to better my education. I’ve worked so hard to get here my whole life, I wouldn’t do anything to get kicked out of this place.” 

After speaking with The Merchant, he reportedly cannot be located because of how short he is.

A cure for the freshman needs to reach MC. The only ones who will step up to face this year's freshman are the seniors. One of the staple characteristics of MC's iconic leadership, seniors usually lead the class and show the younglings how to act. The kids are set in their old menacing ways now, but after a couple of months they will be broken into the MC way of living by Carmelite values.

During the process of their transformation, the freshmen still go out each weekend and cause havoc throughout the Chicagoland area. The breaking-in process takes time, and unfortunately this is one of the side effects they harbor until they are fully treated.

Given enough time, though, these freshmen should be churned out into reasonably good men. This is not the first time that the school has seen malicious kids, and in the past the school has always prevailed.