Students Theorize Teachers are Making Material Up on the Fly

As the third trimester is underway, lots of classes are getting harder and more specific. Students have gone from learning about verbs and nouns to learning about supposed “pluperfect tenses” and “subjunctive mood”.  Naturally students need to find a way to come to terms with that. And while most students do the normal thing and learn the material, it seems that a group of students decided there’s no way anything is this complex. The only reasonable explanation is that it’s all made up.

That’s right–instead of studying the required material, a group of students spent hours putting together a conspiracy, one that claims that teachers are making up all of their material to see how far they can take the joke.

“It’s very simple,” explained freshman Eamon Daly, pointing to a board with pictures of MC faculty and yarn connecting them. “All the teachers are part of a game show, and there are cameras in every room, and the audience watches how much the teachers can make up.”.

Another member of this conspiracy tried his best to give an example. “There is just no way a SNURF is a real thing in our bodies,” said freshman Anthony Oria, referencing the term he was told to memorize in biology class.

You would think the teachers would be a little bit insulted but most of them are taking it well. Some even find it funny. 

“Yesterday a student came up to me after class and said ‘Right…adverbs’ before winking at me,” laughed English teacher Daniel Haggerty.

While most of the MC teachers find these claims hilarious, they all equally believe them to be untrue. 

“That’s exactly what someone who was part of a secret TV show conspiracy would say,” argued junior Jermey Ingram. So it seems these suspecting students are confident in their theory. But weather their right or wrong they will still be taking finals in two month’s time.