Even with stabilizers running, the floor swayed from rough ocean waves. Edna left for the bridge to take over navigation, and the quartet played Pachelbel's Canon in D, known to prevent seasickness.
Uncle Benjamin had diligently protected his nephew from the evils of music for more than a decade. As usual, his uncle only knew half the story. Angus was deeply moved by the beauty of the quartet’s performance and immediately understood that music was not just about nastiness, such as Zach and Zappo’s painful shocks.
Angus let his lids grow heavy, focusing his full attention on the sweet strains of sound.
Tok, tok-tok, tok.
Did he hear that? His eyes snapped open.
Tok, tok-tok, tok.
Definitely, and he recognized the sound.
Tok, tok-tok, tok.
It was getting louder.
"Do you hear that?" Angus asked Trevor.
"Yup," said Trevor, "sounds like tapping on a metal pipe."
"I heard that in town," said Angus, "just before I saw this guy who looked like a pirate."
"Pirates aren't around anymore," said Trevor.
Tok, tok-tok, tok.
The string quartet stopped playing.
"I think something is wrong," said Angus.
And he was right.
Abruptly, the stabilizers went offline, and the boat heaved. Glasses fell smashing to the floor, and a chorus of voices cried out in dismay. The boys clung to the table as its legs were securely bolted in place.
With a gust of wind and seawater, the hatchway clanged open. A colossal man burst in, sporting a shabby tricorn hat and a broad smile displaying stained, triangular teeth that looked like he’d never brushed them. He gripped a cowbell in his mechanical left hand, metal fingers tapping in a constant rhythm.
Tok, tok-tok, tok.
Behind him entered a tall, reedy man wearing a threadbare suit. He clutched a wrinkled sheet of paper in one hand and tried to steady himself with the other.
"That big, beefy guy is the one I saw back in town," whispered Angus as they ducked to hide under the table.
"He sure does look like a pirate," said Trevor.
"None of yous move a muscle, or you'll get thonked," yelled the heavyset man over shattering glass and screams.
"Those two over there, Knucks," the tall one gestured at the twin composers, Stewart, and Joey. "And that’s the new kid on the list, under the table." He pointed directly at Angus.
"Angus," hissed Trevor, "I think they're after you."
"I'm pretty sure you're right," said Angus, his face pale.
"Ohh, this is gonna be fun, Scribbs," chortled the cowbell-wielding man.
"You just watch yourself, Knucks. Remember, we need to take them alive!” reminded Scribbs, “We won’t get paid otherwise."
"Yeah, yeah," said Knucks, "but I can obliterate the others, right Scribbs?"
"Um, not sure," Scribbs donned oval glasses and squinted at the paper. "There's a lot of small print on this contract. I think we should only mess them up, just in case."
"Ok, den." Knucks frowned a little. “Let me warm up Thonker and make sure he’s not set too high.”
“Test him on those goofy-looking punks over there.” Scribbs pointed to Zach and his crew, “They don’t look important.”
Zach whimpered as Knucks slapped the cowbell, and purple sonic rings sprayed forth, toppling everything in their path. Zach took multiple hits, and his jaw dropped open, spewing a colorful gush of vomit. The teenagers sank limply to the floor as the smell of sick spread through the lounge.
"Dat's just stun," Knucks boasted. "My cowbell’s name is Thonker, and you just got thonked."
Meanwhile, on stage, an incredible transformation was unfolding. The viola player stood. Polished armor formed over her body with a rattle, and sweeping wings spread from her back. On her face appeared a mask of metal feathers and glowing golden eyes. Her bow shimmered as it transformed into a luminous white sword, and her viola became a heavy war ax.
"Woah!" exclaimed Trevor. "She’s put on her Persona. I've heard about this but never seen it. She’s a Guardian. She’ll save us!"
"That's enough," the Guardian declared, striding forward, weapons held ready for battle.
"Ah, man," said Scribbs, "there’s a Guardian on board. Knucks, maybe she wants to hear your lovely voice."
Knucks inhaled massively, then let loose an ear-splitting roar of phlegmy saliva and roiling, toxic breath. The Guardian blew backward and slammed through the galley doors to a great crashing of cooking pots.
"Little birdie, go bye-bye," giggled Knucks.
“Well, that was easier than I thought,” said Scribbs as a rifle-shaped clarinet appeared in his hands and his glasses darkened. “Knucks, you collect the kids. Clicky, and I’ll finish off the Guardian.” He cocked his clarinet-rifle, Clicky, and followed through the still-swinging galley doors.
“Ok, den,” Knucks regarded the twins seated with the buzz-cut girl. "Yer gonna get a thonking," he crowed, spittle dribbling down his chin.
As he raised the cowbell, to everyone's astonishment, the girl with the buzz cut leaped up, fists raised, and screamed, "You want them? You’ll have to get through Veronica, and that’s me.”
Veronica charged at Knucks, throwing wild punches at his bloated belly. “You’re messing with the wrong person, stink-breath!"
Knucks grabbed Veronica by the collar and hauled her into the air, flailing and kicking. Thonker vanished, and with a snick, nasty-looking spikes emerged from the pirate’s glove as he cocked his metal hand back into striking position.
“Yer lucky the boss said no killin’,” growled Knucks, tossing her to land near where Angus was hiding.
Angus crept out from under the table to see if she was OK, which unfortunately drew the attention of the drooling ogre.
“Yer the one the boss is paying extra premium for,” said Knucks, “I’m going to thonk you extra good.” He slapped his cowbell, and a stream of purple rings poured forth.
Angus reacted. He sprang up to bound from table to table, then nimbly grabbed the tinkling chandelier, avoiding sonic rings as furniture and glassware exploded behind him. It was almost like jumping from tree to tree while squatching, like a character in one of his video games. Knucks roared in frustration.
Scribbs burst through the galley doors, his clarinet in pieces.
"Knucks, she broke Clicky!" sobbed Scribbs hysterically, “She chopped Clicky in half with her stupid ax!” The clarinet-rifle pieces dissolved in a sparkling cloud, then reassembled as a cracked green crystal on his ring.
The Guardian charged through the swinging doors behind Scribbs, brandishing her sword and ax, looking unharmed and magnificent.
Knucks spun around, still slapping Thonker. The Guardian shielded herself with a wing and advanced on the pirates with a cold, merciless expression. “You are violating the code of Thrum. I have the right to subdue you by any means necessary.” She raised her weapons to emphasize the point.
"Knucks, I don't think we can win this one." said Scribbs, "We better get out of here!"
Without hesitation, the pirates bolted through the hatchway and pitched themselves into the ocean. Angus ran to a porthole and saw the dorsal fins of two enormous sharks disappear into the abyss.
***
The lounge was an absolute disaster. Water sprayed from a broken bar tap, shards of glass crunched underfoot, and anything that hadn’t been bolted down lay strewn haphazardly throughout the space. An eerie silence prevailed as people crept out of hiding.
It wasn’t long before Edna got the stabilizers back online, and the cleanup began. The cellist and two violinists struck up a fast, intense melody. Glasses repaired themselves, paintings rehung themselves, and even most of Zach’s vomit lifted in a blob and flew to the sink.
Angus returned to Trevor and Veronica, crawling out from under their table. They watched the lounge straighten up, mesmerized.
“So that’s what Flight of the Bumblebee does,” said Trevor. “I never knew that piece of music fixed things. I should learn it for cleaning my room.”
The Guardian approached the trio.
“I’m Valora. I heard what happened out here.” the Guardian gave Angus a slight nod, "That’s impressive footwork you have. My fellow string players told me your quick thinking saved this girl's life."
"I don't know what came over me," said Angus. "I just knew what to do."
“Saved my life?” Veronica huffed, “He just stupidly jumped out from under the table and drew attention to himself.”
Valora put her arm around Angus, turning their backs towards Veronica.
"You listened to Thrum," said Valora to Angus. "I wouldn't be surprised if you become a Guardian one day."
Veronica, not to be ignored, ran around to confront Angus and Valora, declaring, “But that kid didn’t save me; I don’t need some boy to save my life!”
“You,” said Valora, “need self-discipline. Attacking a well-armed pirate like that was foolish. You might be dead now if it weren’t for your friend.”
Veronica’s mouth dropped open but failed to produce any sounds of protest.
“I hope to see you later in the city. I must get back to work,” Velora nodded to Angus as her warrior Persona flickered and became a tuxedo. She spun on her heel and joined the string players to help them clean up the ship.
"I need discipline?" groused Veronica once Velora was out of earshot, "I was totally fine with that big lug. One more punch, and he was going down. She is freakin’ cool, though. I will prove to her how brave I am, and then maybe she’ll teach me how to swing an ax like that!"
Angus and Trevor looked at each other in disbelief.
"Hey friend,” Veronica addressed Angus, “thanks for trying to help me, even if I didn’t need it. My name is Veronica, Veronica O'Connell. What do they call you?"
"A-A-Angus, Angus Tutter," he stammered. Girls were the most challenging kind of kids for Angus to talk to.
“Hi, A-A-Angus,” said Veronica with an eye roll, "Your parents sure must like the letter A. What’s your middle name? A-A-Aaron? A-A-Albert? A-A-Albatross?”
Angus wanted to retreat under the table again.
“And dude with the ears? Who are you?" asked Veronica bluntly.
"My name's Trevor. You sure talk like a person who doesn't want friends."
"This is how I talk to my friends," Veronica grinned. "Just wait until you hear me talk to my enemies."
Angus and Trevor sat back at their table, and Veronica, inviting herself, joined them.
"So why were they after you," Veronica asked Angus, "You didn't steal something, did you?"
"I don't know," said Angus. "Clavis said someone might be looking for me, but I didn’t understand why."
"It would be alright if you stole something," nodded Veronica, "Sometimes, you have to steal to survive."
"I didn't steal anything," said Angus defensively.
"Just saying," Veronica went on, "If you did, I wouldn't judge you."
"Pretty sure Angus isn't a thief," said Trevor, "Remember, he did save your life."
"Thieves can save people too, duh," Veronica grunted. “And he didn’t save my life!”
A server came by and dropped off three new glasses of soda with paper straws. Veronica blew bubbles while crossing her eyes. The boys had no idea how to respond.
"Did you know time moves slower in Benthos than everywhere else?" asked Trevor, looking only at Angus.
“Time travel?” Angus looked skeptical.
“Not time travel,” said Trevor, “time dilation.”
“You’re nerding out, dude.” Veronica turned her eyelids inside out.
The boys ignored her.
"One day in Thrum is equal to about one hour everywhere else." said Trevor, "So that means this three-day weekend will feel like about," Trevor did some math in his head, "two months!"
"Two months!" exclaimed Angus, "I only packed enough clothes for three days."
"Don't worry," said Trevor, "They'll wash your clothes, and I think you can get new ones too."
"Clothing is boring," yawned Veronica, "I didn't know I was sitting with two fashionistas. I like my school uniform. It makes getting dressed in the morning easier.” Veronica gestured to her red plaid kilt and white dress shirt.
Angus silently agreed with her.
“Fancy clothes won't help when you get in a fight." Veronica held up her fists like a boxer and threw a couple of jabs. "Lotta kids in my family; I learned to box when I was three. Wanna have a go?"
"Um, no thanks," said Angus and Trevor simultaneously.
"Well, if you ever do, I'll teach you some tricks; like my short hair, you can't pull short hair." Veronica pointed at Angus, "With that mess on your head, I could have you on the ground in seconds."
Angus looked at her fearfully.
"Don't worry, silly!" said Veronica, noticing his expression, "You're my pal now. I'd never hurt you, but I would gladly punch out your enemies.” She turned to Trevor,” Even you, elephant head, I'd even beat someone up for you."
Trevor and Angus felt honored but confused. They'd never met anyone who seemed to enjoy fighting as much as she did.
"I can't believe we got to see a Guardian in action on our first day," said Trevor.
"So, what are Guardians?" asked Angus.
"They’re master musicians who protect Thrum," explained Trevor. "They use their instruments as weapons and mostly learn combat spells."
"Guardians, eh?" said Angus. "I could see myself becoming one of those someday. I'd use my skills to teach Zach and his friends a lesson."
Angus gestured at Zach and company. Zach still had a smear of vomit on his jacket and noticed Angus looking at him.
"What are you staring at, Mop Head?" Zach called across the lounge. "Just wait until we get to the city, and I'll show you what Zappo can do at full volume."
Veronica’s head snapped around, and her eyes narrowed to tiny slits.
“Hey, Mr. Cockatoo,” barked Veronica at Zach, “You realize you puked on yourself? How did that alphabet soup taste, by the way? You learn anything?”
Zach’s face went beet red. Edna walked by, glared at them, and both shut up.
"This is unacceptable," said Edna. "We are now ten minutes late. Start the engines, get the didgeridoo going, turn on the phase inverters, and make double time."
The boat hurtled forward as all systems came online.