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The death of a relative or close friend can be a tough experience for many of us. The funeral should give family and friends both an opportunity to celebrate the life that has been lived, as well as to express and share their sadness. Each ceremony deserves to be remembered as an occasion that uniquely and appropriately honours the person’s life with dignity, respect and love.
A growing number of people choose to live their lives without holding any religious beliefs, and it is important for their funeral to respect this. Humanist Funerals are tailored and personalised ceremonies that make no reference to religious concepts; they are both inclusive of and acceptable to those attending for whom religion is part of their lives. The ceremonies can take place anywhere you choose (except in religious buildings or sites), though the majority are still conducted at Crematoria or Burial Grounds.
In recent times some people choose to have a simple direct cremation funeral ceremony, followed by a memorial ceremony - this is a growing trend. Memorial ceremonies can be rich and full of wonderful detail and are typically much more relaxed because they are held in venues where people feel comfortable – e.g. at home, in a pub or hotel, a village hall, a school, a college – even outdoors if the weather is fine.
As a Humanist Celebrant I have conducted in excess of 1,000 funerals and memorials of differing style, formality and size.
When planning a funeral and/or memorial, I usually meet the family and friends in order to jointly create a ceremony that is unique and appropriate. Whatever the circumstances, I am non-judgmental and sensitive to the wishes of everyone involved.
Content of a ceremony usually includes music (recorded/live), poems, readings and tributes (all of which I can advise on).
A typical order of ceremony:
Music for gathering and entrance
Welcome and introduction
Tribute(s) – spoken by Rebecca, family & friends
Poems and/or Readings
Personal Reflection Time – an opportunity for quiet thought & private prayer (silent or with background music and sometimes with a visual tribute)
Closing words – thankyous and announcements
Final Farewell
Closing music
On the day, I act as the "mistress of ceremonies" and coordinate the whole ceremony. If required I write tailored pieces, particularly the tribute, and will also read pieces on behalf of family and friends.
Some recent testimonials:
I have finally found myself ready to read through this again, almost 2 years on.
You did such a beautiful job of celebrating Pete’s life, and I want to thank you for helping us to do the best we could for him at such a difficult and distressing time. Reading through it again it truly reflects who he was and what he would have wanted. You took so much time and care to understand that, and I really appreciate it.
Aug 2024
Hi Rebecca.
Many thanks for all your help on Monday and for sending us through the final script.
We had lots of feedback from people saying they thought the service was perfect for mum (regardless of the rain), which has been lovely to hear.
Wishing you all the best,
Mar 2024
May I send a big thank you for all your help at such a difficult time. We have had so many lovely comments about the Memorial Service at the club and we are especially grateful to you for helping us to take the control of the proceedings at the outset. We would have found that very difficult without the benefit of your experience.
We all felt that she had a good send off!
Many thanks,
Mar 2023
Thank you so much for conducting mum's service and travelling so far to do it. I think we gave her a very good send off.
Thank you the script I will treasure it along with the programme.
Love to you, take care
Feb 2023
We are so pleased that we chose you as celebrant. The ceremony was exactly as we had hoped it might be. All the family thought you were excellent, and I am sure Jean herself would have been impressed. Interestingly, several of Jean’s friends told me they had no idea what to expect but were pleasantly surprised. Jan 2020
Dear Rebecca, our families are extraordinarily grateful for conducting yesterday’s ceremony to celebrate Chris’s life. Everything about the ceremony had just the right touch and the love flowed like water. We could not ask for more. Please accept our sincerest thanks for all the good work, guidance and kindness you gave us at a time when we were at out lowest ebbs. Anyone who was there will remember a truly unforgettable event which showed that Chris was a very special person who loved and was loved and whose love will be remembered for evermore. Aug 2019
Thank you.
What a great job you did ! ..... at the crematorium and Rowing Club. It was almost as though you knew my sister, from picking up bits of information from family and friends. The whole occasion was well co-ordinated by you and had just the right ‘feel’. Thank you again May 2019
Thanks for everything. The day went as I hoped and many people commented afterwards that they've never been to a funeral of that style before and how it was the best they've ever been to, which is what I wanted. Feb 2019
Hi Rebecca
Thank you for the script and thank you for the ceremony you provided. I feel it all went according to plan. I had a very large number of people saying how great the service was, and how much Jonathan would have been thrilled about it. Jan 2019
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