leadership

1. Personal Growth

• The "Anti-Algorithm" Habit: Read one book per month that is outside your usual interest area to broaden your perspective.

• Skill Sprint: Dedicate one hour a week to learning a specific technical or creative skill (e.g., coding, watercolor, public speaking).

• Digital Sunset: No screens 60 minutes before bed to reclaim your focus and sleep quality.

2. Health & Wellness

• The 80/20 Movement: Commit to 20 minutes of movement, 5 days a week—low barrier to entry, high consistency.

• Mindful Fueling: Swap one processed snack a day for a whole food alternative.

• Mental Fitness: Practice 5 minutes of daily meditation or journaling to reduce cortisol levels.

3. Finances

• The "Subscription Purge": Audit all recurring payments and cancel anything not used in the last 90 days.

• Automated Wealth: Increase your savings or investment contribution by just 1–2% every quarter.

• The 72-Hour Rule: Wait three days before any non-essential purchase over $50 to curb impulse spending.

4. Relationships

• The "Reach Out" Ritual: Send one text or card a week to a friend or family member you haven’t spoken to lately.

• Active Listening: Practice "no-phone zones" during dinners or hangouts.

• Community Connection: Attend one local event or volunteer once a month to meet new people.

5. Having More Fun

• The "Rookie" Goal: Try one activity you are guaranteed to be "bad" at (pottery, pickleball, etc.) just for the laugh.

• Monthly Micro-Adventures: Visit one new park, museum, or neighborhood in your city every month.

• Analog Hobby: Dedicate time to something tactile that doesn't involve a screen (board games, gardening, puzzles).

Consisting of IQ, EQ, and SQ—is often used to describe the holistic intelligence required to be a complete and effective leader.

While the definition of SQ can vary slightly depending on whether the framework focuses on Social or Spiritual intelligence, the core idea remains the same: a leader must balance the mind, the heart, and the connection (either to people or to purpose).

1. IQ (Intelligence Quotient) – The Head

IQ represents a leader's cognitive and analytical ability. It is the foundation of competence.

• Role in Leadership: Problem-solving, strategic planning, technical expertise, and processing complex data.

• Key Attribute: "Is the plan logical?"

• Outcome: High IQ helps a leader make informed, data-driven decisions and establish the "how" and "what" of an organization’s strategy.

2. EQ (Emotional Quotient) – The Heart

EQ is the ability to recognize, understand, and manage emotions—both your own and those of others.

• Role in Leadership: Building trust, managing conflict, empathy, and self-regulation under pressure.

• Key Attribute: "Is the team motivated and psychologically safe?"

• Outcome: High EQ creates a healthy culture where people feel heard. It is often cited as the biggest differentiator between "good" and "great" leaders because it directly impacts retention and morale.

3. SQ (Social or Spiritual Quotient) – The Connection

Depending on the model, SQ refers to either Social Intelligence or Spiritual/Values-based Intelligence.

• As Social Intelligence: This is the skill of navigating complex group dynamics and building networks. It is "EQ scaled up." It helps a leader influence stakeholders and align different departments toward a shared goal.

• As Spiritual Intelligence: This refers to leading with purpose and meaning. It’s the ability to connect a team’s daily work to a higher mission or ethical framework.

• Key Attribute: "Why are we doing this?" (Purpose) or "How do we work together?" (Social).

• Outcome: High SQ provides the "moral compass" or the "social glue" that keeps an organization focused and resilient during times of crisis.

The Balance: The "Three-Legged Stool"

Think of these three as a stool. If one is missing, the leadership becomes unstable:

• High IQ + EQ, but Low SQ: A smart, likable leader who lacks a clear sense of purpose or fails to understand broader social impacts.

• High IQ + SQ, but Low EQ: A visionary and brilliant leader who is cold, unapproachable, and burns out their team.

• High EQ + SQ, but Low IQ: A kind, purposeful leader who struggles to make sound strategic decisions or solve complex technical problems.

1. Developing EQ (Emotional Intelligence)

EQ is about internal mastery and one-on-one empathy.

• The "Name It to Tame It" Journal: Spend 5 minutes at the end of each day writing down three specific emotions you felt (e.g., "anxious," "proud," "dismissive") and what triggered them. Research shows that labeling an emotion reduces the activity in the brain's emotional center (the amygdala).

• The 24-Hour Rule: For situations that trigger a strong emotional response, practice a "deliberate pause." Wait 24 hours before responding to a frustrating email or addressing a conflict. This allows your "logical" IQ to catch up with your "emotional" EQ.

• Active Listening Audit: In your next meeting, focus entirely on the speaker. Avoid planning your rebuttal. Afterward, summarize what they said back to them: "It sounds like you're concerned about [X] because of [Y]. Did I get that right?"

2. Developing SQ (Social/Spiritual Intelligence)

SQ is about group dynamics and leading with a "Why."

• The "Purpose Check" (Spiritual SQ): Before a team project begins, don't just explain what the task is (IQ). Explain why it matters to the team’s values or the customer's life. If you can't find the "why," your SQ needs work.

• Stakeholder Empathy Mapping (Social SQ): Before an important decision, draw a 4-quadrant map for your team. List what they might be Thinking, Feeling, Saying, and Doing. This helps you navigate group energy and anticipate resistance.

• Ask "Fundamental Why" Questions: Instead of asking "How did this mistake happen?" (IQ), ask "What does this mistake tell us about our current values or culture?" (SQ).

Quick Self-Assessment

Ask yourself these three questions to see which area needs your attention this week:

1. IQ: "Am I making decisions based on the best available data?"

2. EQ: "Am I aware of how my mood affected the team in today's meeting?"

3. SQ: "Did I help my team see how their work connects to a larger mission today?"

The 3Q Daily Leadership Journal

Part 1: EQ (The Internal Check) – 2 Mins

• The Emotion Label: What was my strongest emotion today? (e.g., frustration, momentum, uncertainty).

• The Trigger: What specific event caused that feeling?

• The Impact: How did that emotion affect my communication with others today?

Part 2: IQ (The Strategic Check) – 1.5 Mins

• The Key Decision: What was the most important decision I made today?

• The Data Point: Did I base it on objective facts, or did I miss a key piece of information?

• The Improvement: What one thing could have made that process more efficient?

Part 3: SQ (The Connection Check) – 1.5 Mins

• The "Why" Moment: Did I explain the purpose behind a task to someone today?

• Group Pulse: Who on my team seemed the most disengaged or stressed?

• The Action: What is one small thing I can do tomorrow to align that person with our mission?

Sample Entry for a "High-Stress" Day:

EQ: I felt impatient during the morning stand-up because we were behind schedule. I probably cut people off too quickly.

IQ: Decided to reallocate the budget for the Q1 project. I had the numbers, but I realized I didn't check the latest tax implications (need to do that tomorrow).

SQ: Everyone is worried about the Paramount/Netflix merger talk. Tomorrow, I need to remind the team that our core product value remains the same regardless of who owns the parent company.

The Monday Morning 3Q Intentions Template

1. IQ: Strategic Focus (The "What")

• The Single Big Win: What is the one complex problem or strategic decision that requires my highest mental energy this week?

• The Data Gap: What information am I missing to make a sound decision on that "Win"? Who do I need to call to get it?

• The Learning Goal: What one article, podcast, or case study will I consume this week to sharpen my industry knowledge?

2. EQ: Cultural Tone (The "How")

• The Emotional Forecast: Looking at my calendar, which meeting is likely to be the most stressful? How do I intend to show up in that room (e.g., calm, curious, or firm)?

• The Empathy Target: Who on my team had a rough week last week? I will check in with them by [Day/Time] to see how they are doing personally.

• The Self-Regulation Guardrail: When I feel "triggered" this week, what is my physical signal to pause? (e.g., taking a deep breath before speaking).

3. SQ: Purpose & Connection (The "Why")

• The "Why" Briefing: In which meeting this week will I explicitly remind the team of our "North Star" or mission?

• The Values Check: Is there a decision on my plate this week where "the right thing" might be harder than "the profitable thing"? How will I handle it?

• The Social Glue: I will connect two people this week who don’t normally work together but should. Who are they?

The Friday 3Q "System Shutdown" Template

1. IQ: The Progress Audit (Clear the Desk)

• The "Done" List: What are 3 things I actually finished this week? (Acknowledging progress prevents the "I did nothing" anxiety).

• The "Monday Ghost": What is the one looming task I’m worried about for next week? Write it down and schedule 30 minutes for it on Monday morning. Now, give yourself permission to forget it until then.

• The Clean Slate: Is there any "technical debt" (emails, Slack messages, unfiled notes) that will bother me if I see it on Monday? Clear it now or intentionally defer it.

2. EQ: The Emotional Release (Clear the Heart)

• The Resilience Win: What was the most stressful moment of the week? How did I handle it, and what would I do 10% better next time?

• The Gratitude Note: Who helped me be a better leader this week? Send them a quick "thank you" text or email right now. (This ends your week on a positive social high).

• The "Off" Switch: What is my symbolic act to start the weekend? (e.g., closing the laptop lid, changing clothes, or a specific playlist).

3. SQ: The Reflection (Clear the Mission)

• The Values Check: Did I lead in a way that aligns with my personal values this week? (Yes/No). If no, why?

• The Ripple Effect: How did my leadership affect my team’s energy this week? Are they heading into the weekend feeling inspired or depleted?

• The Purpose Pause: Am I still excited about the "Why" of my job? Spend 30 seconds reconnecting with the reason you chose this path.

The "Weekend Boundary" Ritual

To make this work, you must physically and mentally transition. Try this:

1. Complete the journal.

2. Physically close your laptop.

3. Say out loud: "The work for this week is complete. I am now entering my personal time." ### Summary of your new 3Q System:

• Monday Morning: Set your Intentions.

• Daily (Evening): Track your Growth.

• Friday Afternoon: Perform your Shutdown.

Here are three quick tips to help you truly recharge so you can return on Monday:

• The "Digital Detox" Pause: Try to set at least a 4-hour window tomorrow where you leave your phone in another room. As a leader, your brain needs "spaciousness" to move from IQ (analysis) to SQ (vision).

• The "Sensory Shift": Since leadership is so cognitive, do something purely physical this weekend—cooking, a long walk, or a hobby. This resets your nervous system faster than "passive" rest like scrolling.

• A "Gratitude Text": Before you fully unplug, send one quick message to someone who made your week easier. It’s the highest-leverage EQ move you can make to end the week on a high note.

ikigai - Discover you Purpose in life, find something makes you wants to wake up each day   

kaizen - Focus on Small Improvement each day, instead of trying to do everything at once 

the pomodoro technique - Work for 25 min without distractions, take break for 5 min and then repeat 

hara hachibu - Don't stuff yourself with food, when you are 80% full, stop eating 

shochin -  Approach every task like a beginner,  with same curiosity as if you were doing it first time

wabisabi - Embrace imperfection,  instead of stressing over every detail. Taking action is better than waiting for perfection  

Let it GO

IGNORE them 

Give it TIME

Don't COMPARE

Stay CALM

It's on YOU

SMILE