Parsha Short Talks - Vayishlach 

Jacob sent Esau a message in which he explained why he had not sent him any communication for quite some time. Jacob spent 20 years at Laban’s house. The first seven years were payment for Leah. The second seven years was payment for Rachel. The next six years was so that he could build up some personal wealth. Then the Lord came to Jacob and said it's time to go home to your father and your mother. He sent a message to Esau about his coming home.

In the Hebrew Jacob used the term garti. This word means that he was living temporarily at Laban’s estate and had no intention of staying there longer than he had to. The sage Rashi adds an interesting Midrashic interpretation of the word garti. Hebrew words can be expressed as numeric values. In this case the word garti adds up to 613. There are 613 mitzvot, commandments, that are found in the first five books of the Bible, the Torah. Rashi said that the word garti was used by God to indicate to us that Jacob followed the 613 mitzvot while he was spending his 20 years with Laban.

When you add up the values of the letters that comprise the word garti, or any other word that has the same numerical value, it's not that important that the word adds up to 613. What is important is that we are commanded by God to attempt to follow all 613 mitzvot. It is when you add up all the things you do to follow God's word that your individual judgment before God, when that day comes, is all that matters period.

Jacob was on his way to meet Esau so that they could reconcile their differences. To prepare for the meeting Jacob sent emissaries to Esau. Jacob's message was that he was a sojourner in a foreign land and was now returning home. The sage Rashi tells us that Jacob’s message was stating that he had not become an officer or a Prince. Jacob always remained as a sojourner. Therefore, Esau had no reason to be upset with Jacob.

Something we can learn from Jacob’s time with his uncle Laban was that not only did Jacob continue to follow the ways of God, but he also did not pick up any of the bad habits nor crafty ways of Laban. For us it means that we need to continue God's way but we also have to be very careful that we don't get infected by evil. Satan surrounds the earth with his evil inclination and is constantly trying to drive us toward him and away from God. If you ensure that you keep the ways of the Lord, then you have protection from Satan’s ways because you will be able to recognize evil inclination when you meet it. Always keep your faith in God.

The time had come that Jacob was about to meet his brother. He didn't know if his brother was going to accept him back into the family or whether he was going to try to kill him. Jacob knew that Esau was fast approaching him with 400 armed men. Things didn't look that good for a peace treaty.

Jacob prepared for both possibilities. He prepared gifts to give to Esau to appease him. However, he prepared his family for a battle. Most important thing he did was to pray to the Lord for protection and direction.

Jacob describes Esau in two different ways; he calls him a brother and he calls him by his name. Certainly, in his prayers God knew that Esau was Jacob’s brother. So, Jacob prayed to the Lord for both possibilities and certainly hope that Esau would come to him as a loving brother so that their family could come together.

When Esau met Jacob, he kissed him on the cheek. Was that the kiss of death or was that the kiss of family? Luckily for Jacob it was the kiss of family. When you're approached by an individual, especially if you don't know the person, you must be prepared for the possibility of making a new friend or encountering an enemy. If it is all possible it is better to find out the motives of the individual before meeting them. Always be on your guard because evil inclination can enter the hearts of people at different times in their lives. A person who was a good friend years later may not be a good friend anymore. The best option is to follow Jacob and offer prayers to God for both situations.

Jacob was about to meet his brother Esau after many years of separation. He prepared in three different ways. Jacob first split his camp into two groups, and he instructed his children on how to defend themselves but also how to escape. The second thing he did was he sent a large contingent of men with gifts for his brother’s army. The last thing he did was pray for God’s guidance and providence.

Today, we live in a world of confusion and uncertainty. We have people we may call friends, but the turns out that they're really enemies. I’m sure you heard of the expression about someone being a backstabber. Even cousins, brothers and sisters can become enemies. Sometimes we just don’t know what their intentions are.

Personally, I had a 20-year separation from my family because of the way my mother treated her mother. One day, out of the blue, I got a phone call from my older brother. I directly asked him why he was concerned about me since I hadn’t heard from him in over 20 years? I was happy at the end of that phone call because a reconciliation occurred. Today we talk and text with each other on an almost daily basis. It is nice to have my older brother back.

Sometimes we just don’t know the reasoning of why people do things. When that’s true, ask what the intentions are of the person who is contacting you, whether it be friend or foe or family.

The sinew found in the rear portion of an animal is not considered kosher and therefore not eatable. This is based on the biblical story of Jacob having a struggle with an angel the day before he meets Esau. It is a vague narrative that Jacob struggles with an angel as he prepares to meet Esau. Midrash seemed to tell us that indeed the representative of Esau’s forces was the angel, and thus an evil angel.

The outcome of the battle between Jacob and the angel is intriguing. Because Jacob pins the angel in an inescapable hold and does not let him go. When the angel figures out that he could not physically overcome Jacob, he touches the socket of Jacob’s hip and it becomes dislocated, which allows the angel to escape. You can find this in Genesis chapter 32 verse 26. The Torah tells us that the angel pleaded for Jacob to release him and that the angel changes Jacob’s name to Israel. But there’s a lot more going on than just that. This Torah story concludes with the third Mitzot in the Torah, one that Jews are to keep until this very day because they may not eat the sinew of an animal.

Perhaps the story is teaching us that in every aspect of our lives, there is an ability to connect the most mundane experience to a Torah lesson. Jacob was defeating the angel, which doesn’t seem like much when you think about it. Unfortunately, Jacob bore the mark of his struggle with the angel because he had a limp for the rest of his life. What we must do is look at this narrative and determine the spiritual blessing that we received from it. Perhaps it is simply that every story that we find in Scripture has meaning for our lives. Whether what you’re doing is mundane or full of joy. It doesn’t matter because sometimes in our lives we are doing mundane things, and then there are times of joy and there are times of sorrow. Ecclesiastes chapter 1 gives us all those possibilities. Everything that happens in life is from God, and we need to respect that. We also need to look at the stories in the Torah and see how we can apply them to our lives. 

In chapter 32 of the book of Genesis, we find a narrative about a struggle between a mortal man and an immortal counterpart. The description is about the battle between Jacob and an angel. Jacob was alone in the predawn hours after retrieving whatever was left on the opposite bank of the river for his family. A man approached him that Jacob did not know. When the man got close enough to Jacob, he engaged him in battle. At the end of the struggle, Jacob dislocated his hip socket. The angel said to Jacob to let him go because the dawn was approaching.

It was this statement by this mystery man that Jacob realized he was wrestling with an angel. He believed it was the angel of Esau. Jacob made a condition with the angel that he would release him only if the angel blessed him. Midrash tells us that every one of us has an angelic representative here on earth. Today, we like to call them guardian angels. The Talmud tells us that angels have celestial responsibilities that begin at dawn. That is why the angel begged Jacob to let him go so he could perform his duties for the Lord.

So, Jacob asked the angel for his name. The response was, “why do you ask my name?” That was the only response Jacob received from God, and then he was blessed by the angel. The obvious question is the meaning of the angel’s response? There are many narratives in the Torah that tell us of Jews who asked for names. For example, Moses was in the wilderness at the burning bush and he asked God what is your name? Jacob did not understand the answer he got and what it tells us today is that we need to ask questions even if the answer is going to be vague or not understandable.

God created us to ask questions, even about the Scripture. That’s how we learn and grow in the ways of the Lord by asking questions. So, have you been told in your church or synagogue that you’re not allowed to question the pastor? They are biblically incorrect. Ask questions because it will expand your understanding.

In the middle of the night, Jacob woke up and went to move his family across the river. The Torah says that Jacob took his wives, his children, and all his possessions when he crossed the stream at Yobok. However, Jacob did not go with the rest of the family. He remained on the opposite side of the river. He was alone and there he fought an angel until the morning. A question is why did Jacob not stay with his family?

The sages explained to us that Jacob must’ve forgotten something that was insignificant because the previous verse said that he took all of his possessions. The sages explained to us that whatever that object was; it was not considered important enough to be part of Jacob's possessions. However, Jacob knew otherwise. Whether it was a small jug that had sentimental value for one of his wives or an old blanket, that might’ve been something to one of his children. Jacob risked it all to get that item.

Jacob’s lesson is about risk in our daily lives. The little things in life are just as important as the big ones. It is up to the person who is missing the object as to its value. You might think that a child's blanket, torn to shreds, is junk, but remember that possessions hold unique value for different people. In some cases, you may have to take a risk to recover something you thought was worthless but of great value to a family member.

In the Torah, the word for “kiss” has dots over it. On rare occasions in the Torah, letters are left out of words hinting that there’s a secret meaning that we need to discover. The Torah add symbols even though they're tiny ones, especially dots over a word that tells us to look even deeper to find out what was really going on.

In this Parsha, Jacob lifted his eyes up and he saw Esau was coming toward him. Fear rushed through his body because he didn’t know what Esau planned. He tried to protect his family so that hopefully they would not be hurt. Esau ran toward Jacob and embraced him and gave him a kiss on his neck and then the two of them wept. So why does the Torah highlight the word kiss to us? It is a cryptic coding that tells us a spiritual lesson that we all must learn. Midrash says that Esau wanted to bite Jacob on the neck and bite him hard enough that he would kill him. But when he went to bite Jacob, he actually gave him a kiss. The two brothers reconciled their differences right there.

A lesson here is that when someone embraces you, whether you know them or not you may not know their true intentions. Keep your guard up, probably at all times. I know that sounds a little rough because there are people that I’m sure you trust with your life. Therefore, perhaps this lesson should be about people you don’t know and discover their intentions before we completely open up to them.

I made that mistake once of trusting a person who said he was clergy and it turned out that he really wasn’t and did some interesting things that a clergy person would not do. I should not have trusted immediately his advances toward wanting to help me in the parish. Perhaps this situation of mine explains the kiss of dots.

In Genesis 33:17, we read Jacob had built some huts for his animals and his family to live in after he had his encounter with his brother Esau. He stayed at this place for 18 months. He named the town that he had created Sukkot, which means huts in Hebrew. It is interesting that Jacob did not call the settlement by the name of the homes he built, but by these huts that he built for his animals. This naming has puzzled commentators for many years why Jacob would choose a name representing the temporary animal structures rather than calling the city houses or something like that which would refer to a more permanent dwelling for humans. At that time, the huts that people created for the animals were not intended to last for a long period of time.

So, Jacob did something unprecedented in his era. He was very proud of the huts that he built for his animals, and he wanted to express that pride by naming the town after the huts. By calling the town Sukkot, he showed the world that he cared for not only humans but also for his animals.

What we can learn from the spiritually is how can we leave our mark on the world when it’s time for us to join God in heaven? What kind of legacy are you going to leave behind?

Before I give you the narrative of this short talk, I want to say that it is extremely sad to think that this happened in ancient times but would also still happen today.

Jacob’s family was moving through the city of Shechem. Shechem, the son of King Chamor attacked and violated Jacob’s daughter Deena. Shechem, the son of the King, later claimed that he was madly in love with her and wanted to marry her. No one in the city would bring justice for Deena. Therefore, Jacob’s sons, Deena’s brothers, took justice on their own. In order not to be attacked by surrounding towns, they came up with an interesting ruse. What they did first was to create a harmonious relationship with the people of Shechem. In Genesis 34:16, we are told that the brothers told the men of the city that they all had to be circumcised. Under the direction of King Chamor, all the men were circumcised on the same day.

The third day after circumcision is the most painful, and this is when Jacob’s sons took revenge for their sister. They entered the city and killed all the men. What happened was the city of Shechem was a Gentile city and had become a Jewish city. Therefore, none of the surrounding towns came to the rescue of the people and help them because the city was now a Jewish city, and they didn’t care what happened to Jews.

The sad part of the story is that this happens today in that when Jews are attacked no one cares. We saw this especially on campuses in April and May 2024. Students with false information about the war in Israel reacted by deciding to kill Jews because they just hated them. Why do people hate Jews? Without Jews, many technologies would not exist today. Do the pro-Hamas protestors understand what happened on October 7, 2023? They probably do not! All they care about is that Jews should die. Antisemitism has been around for too many centuries.

God teaches us we are to love one another. It does not matter what your heritage or race or original birthplace is. God teaches love for all people, and we need to learn that badly today.

As Jacob was going home from his father-in-law Laban, tragedy struck the family. Rachel had died in childbirth. Benjamin was born without a mother. He would become an orphan for life. Jacob decided not to bury Rachel in the family plot at Machpelah. Rather, he buried her in Bethlehem. The question then becomes why did Jacob bury Rachel in Bethlehem?

The midrash tells us that Jacob foresaw that one day the Jews would be exiled from the land of Israel by the Babylonians. By placing Rachel’s tomb in Bethlehem near the main pass between Jerusalem and Babylon, every person being exiled could pass by her grave. When the Babylonian exile began, the Babylonians transformed Rachel from a symbol of despair and grief into a symbol of hope for eternity. We are told that as the Jews passed by Rachel’s tomb; they gained hope in the future through Rachel’s death. The midrash also tells us that Rachel cried for all the children of Israel that passed by her while being taken into exile in Bethlehem. It is also believed that Rachel would cry for all Jews until they all returned to the promised land that God had given to them.